I understand that when I am unkind, it impacts on others Year 3 – Friends and family I understand that when I am unkind, it impacts on others Teacher notes For this lesson, arrange the children in groups of 4. Draw 2 Rainbow Fish, one happy and one sad, on large paper and display this on the wall of the classroom. Provide the children with some cut out fish scales, the size will depend on the size of the fish that you drawn as the intention is for them to blue tack the scales onto the fish later in the lesson. ( It may be helpful to put a piece of blue tack on each scale before you hand them out or you may find it easier to use a glue stick). Each child also needs a felt pen to write on the scales. The scales can be on coloured paper if you are wanting to make a more permanent display of them. © Leeds South and East CCG

Learning outcomes Knowledge Skills I recognise what is fair and unfair, kind and unkind, what is right and wrong I recognise when people are being unkind either to them or others I know what to do when someone is unfair or unkind I can think of a time that I have been unkind and have apologised I can think of a time when someone has been unkind to me and how it made me feel Teacher notes Read these through with the children, ensure they are understood. It is important for the children to understand how we can all show unkind behaviours at times; it depends on what it happening in our lives. Children should take these considerations into account when they respond to other people’s unkindness. 2

How we will work together Can you remember the ground rules we have already talked about, let’s take a minute to think about them. Teacher notes Read these through with the children. Hopefully the ground rules will be displayed in the classroom already. 3

What do we already know? Which of these characters is unkind and which is kind? Why do you think this? How would you respond to these characters if you met them? Teacher notes Ask the children the questions and note down some of their answers. Try and establish why they think what they think, is it from their own experience of people? Do not influence their answers at this stage. It will be interesting to see if the children simply think a mean face implies an unkind person and equally a kind face implies a kind person. Do they understand that a kind person can be unkind at times? 4

Let’s get started I am going to give you extra homework. You are going to all miss your play. Teacher I think you are rubbish at English. You can sit on your own over there. Teacher notes Ask the children to imagine that you, their teacher, said some of the above comments to the class. How would they feel? What would they think of you? What would they do? Who would they tell? Would it be fair or unfair if you did this? Would it be right or wrong? How would they expect their own teacher to behave and why? EVEN BETTER, if you feel that it is appropriate and that there is a suitable child to participate: role play a small scene where you are in fact unfair/unkind to a child. Only do this if you feel that a child would enjoy participating in a small role play. At the end of the role play ask the class to say how they felt you behaved to the child and how it made them feel. 5

What happens when you are faced with someone being unkind? https://youtu.be/RbKr-k1PTvA Teacher notes Remind the children of the clip that they watched about the Sneetches, last year in Y2, remind them of what they learnt about how their behaviour affects others. Now watch this very well known story. Click on the fish to open link. Focus the children at the start of the clip by asking them to observe Rainbow Fish’s behaviour and the behaviour of the other fish. Who starts being unkind? How are the acts of unkindness responded to? What is the turning point in the story? What does Rainbow Fish learn about being unkind and kind? How does it make him feel? How does Octopus help Rainbow Fish? Who could be our Octopus when we need someone? Can the children start to relate this story to real life incidents that they have experienced? Watch the video clip Copyright 1995 Reed Business Information, Inc. 6

How does our behaviour affect others? This is Rainbow Fish. Watch his adventure to see what he learns about being unkind and kind. Can you remember the clip about the Sneetches from last year? In the Rainbow fish clip: Who starts being unkind? How are the acts of unkindness responded to? What is the turning point in the story? What does Rainbow Fish learn about being unkind and kind? How does it make him feel? How does Octopus help Rainbow Fish? Who could be our Octopus when we need someone? Can the children start to relate this story to real life incidents that they have experienced? Copyright 1995 Reed Business Information, Inc. 7

What did Rainbow Fish learn? Think: Why did the fish behave as they did? Why was Rainbow Fish unkind / kind? How did Octopus help? How should you respond when people are unkind / kind? Talk to the people in your group. Discuss what you think Rainbow Fish learnt about being unkind and kind. Teacher notes Give the children 3-4 minutes to discuss what they think Rainbow Fish learnt. Ask for a comment from each group/table. Walk around and encourage the children to think deeply about their answers, try to pull out the fact that there are often reasons why people behave in an unkind manner, it is not just because they are unkind people. Try to get the children to think about how Rainbow Fish felt. Was it right or wrong for him to act in the way he did? Did the other fish have a reason for their behaviour? How else could the fish or Rainbow Fish have reacted? Can the children start to relate this to how things can go wrong in the class/ playground. 8

How does it feel? Skill Practice Can I think of a time that I have been unkind and have maybe apologised? Can I think of a time when someone has been unkind to me? You have each been given two fish scales. On one of the fish scales write down a word that describes how Rainbow Fish felt when the other fish were unkind to him. On the other scale write down a word that describes how he felt when they were kind. Teacher notes Give each child two fish scales (paper). Read the above to the children and ask them to think about the feelings associated with kind and unkind behaviour. Ask them to really think about how they feel in such situations, encourage them to try and ‘dig deep’ for different feelings; it is too easy to write ‘happy’ and ‘sad’. As they write and talk, can they think of a time when they have been unkind and maybe have apologised? Can they also think of a time that someone was unkind to them? Ask them to write their words on the scales with a felt tip. Ask the children what the word empathise means, explain if they do not know. It is really important to get the children to empathise with these feelings and ask what they would do in someone else’s situation, be aware of any issues a child may have before doing this. 9

Let’s discuss… Skill Practice Can I think of a time that I have been unkind and have maybe apologised? Can I think of a time when someone has been unkind to me? You have been given some cards showing some different situations where people are being unkind. Discuss these situations with your group. Can you put them in order of unkindness? Start with the least unkind and carry on to most unkind Think about who the person in the situation could ask for help Teacher notes Read the above to the children and ask them to think about the feelings associated with unkind and kind behaviour. Ask them to really think about how they feel in such situations. As they write and talk can they think of a time when they have been unkind and maybe have apologised. Can they also think of a time that someone was unkind to them? With a felt tip ask them to write their words on the scales, encourage them to try and ‘ dig deep’ for different feelings; it is too easy to write ‘happy’ and ‘sad.’ Ask the children what the word empathise means, explain if they do not know. It is really important to get the children to empathise with these feelings, be aware of any issues a child may have before doing this. 10

So, what do you feel you have learnt today? So, which of these characters do you think is unkind and which is kind? How would you react to someone who was unkind or kind? Who would you ask for help? Teacher notes: Now ask the children to revisit this slide. Do another blind vote and ask the children the question. Compare the answers. Ask some individuals their opinion on the answer to the question. Compare their answers to the initial slide. 11

Do something kind for someone at home Remembering everything we have learnt about being kind and unkind Go and do something kind for someone at home this week This may be helping with tea, tidying up the lounge, tidying the table after tea How did it make the person feel? Teacher notes Ask the children to be a bit more mindful of how they respond to their parents when they are asked to do jobs/go to bed/ get up/ do homework at home. Ask them how their parents react when they do exactly what is asked of them. Do they feel that by doing what is asked of them that they are cooperating or not? 12

Additional resources and help Talk to your teacher or an adult in school Talk to your Mum, Dad or someone you trust at home about how you are feeling If you have them: – Write your worry down and post it in the class worry box – Talk to a peer mediator in your school – Write your worry down on the worry wall on the school’s website Contact: www.mindmate.org.uk/ im-a-young-person Where can I go for help? 12