1. Principled Decision-Making for Leaders & Teams Patrick F. Bassett Bassett@HeadsUpEd.com 202.746.5444 The Endgame? Bassett@HeadsUpEd.com The End

2. How To Be Useful to your Head of School Who’s Got the Monkey? (“Houston, We’ve Got a Problem”)

3. Whose Got the Monkey? I walk into the head’s office to say, “We have a problem – Mrs. Regalia in on the warpath….” What’s the problem?

4. Difficult Conversations

5. Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen How’s the project coming? Fine, thanks. You’re holding me up. You’re a jerk. I hate you. Levels: Stated vs. Implied. Business at hand vs. Threats to my image.

6. Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen. Can it wait? I’m busy Puzzle: Mishandled conversations create the very outcomes we dread.conversations She doesn’t get what my work demands.. Fine. You think you’re only busy one? You don’t love me. The Spouse/Partner Version You’re a jerk. I hate you.

7. Leading from the… Middle

8. Positional Power  We’re ambivalent about power: not sure where the right balance is between coercion and freedom, power and persuasion, to secure the common good.  “The Imposter Phenomenon.”  Do you have all the authority you need to effect the change you want? Does the President?  Yes, if you follow Gandhi’s dictum “to be the change you want to see in the world.”  That’s where education comes in: the underutilized repertoire of non-coercive power.

9. Creating a Movement Creating a Movement ~ Derek Sivers, Ted TalkTed Talk

10. Creating a Movement Creating a Movement – 4 Principles 1. A lone nut does something great... (PFB: Leaders don’t have to be talented, just a bit crazy.)talentedcrazy 2. …but no movement without the first follower. (PFB: You can’t care too much about what others think or about the risk of looking crazy too.) 3. Cultivate and celebrate the first follower… (PFB: Show the way, then honor the first followers.) 4. …or have the courage to be the first follower. (PFB: Moral courage the 1 st virtue: Be the John Hancock to Thomas Jefferson or the Reverend Abernathy to Martin Luther King, Jr.)

11. Lessons in Leadership from Montpelier  James Madison arrived at the Philadelphia Convention in 1787 with no positional power but a big idea. Instead of reforming the Articles of Confederation, abandon them. 1. Informational/Expertise Power: What does history tell us? 2. Interpersonal/Relational Power: High EQ trumps all. “Neither a lender nor debtor be.” 3. Associative Power: Networking. Tipping point leadership: Gladwell’s maven, connector, salesperson. How Do You Lead without much positional power, in flat organizations? (Who has the positional power?)

12. Lessons in Leadership from Montpelier  Positional Power: Not that important or even effective, since without coercion, it’s rooted in the “willingness of the governed” to accept the dicta of people in power.  Leaders in the middle have little real “assigned” power: but that you have (expertise and relational and associative), learn to develop and extend it.  Leaders in the middle can and do change the world. Remember Margaret Meade’s observation: “Never underestimate the power of a handful of people to change the world. After all, it’s the only thing that ever does.”

13. Myers-Briggs Profiles

14. Myers-Briggs Types Your Team’s Profile? Our ProfileEISNTFJP Totals:1068897151 ESTJESFPINTJENFJENTJISTJISFJESFJINFJ 311232112

15. Z Decision-Making (What’s your Team’s Myers-Briggs Profile)

16. Myers-Briggs Z+2 Model I/E (introvert/extrovert); S/N (sensing/intuition); T/F (thinking/feeling); J/P (judging/perceiving) Adapted from The Zig-Zag ™ Process for Problem Solving, developed by Gordon D. Lawrence, Center for Applications of Psychological Type, Inc., 2004. How do you make decisions? How do you process info? S (Sensing): What problem are we trying to solve? What are the facts, details, frequency? N (iNtuition): What are the patterns and theories for why this might be happening? How do we brainstorm solutions? T (Thinking): What are the criteria by which we should make this decision? What is the logical way to address the problem? The ethical dimensions? F (Feeling): What is the impact on people? How can we deliver this info in the best way to get results? See “slow thinking” process in the “Bassett Blog on the Horns of a Dilemma”Bassett Blog on the Horns of a Dilemma

17. Dilemma Case Studies… NAIS’s & Yours The IGE (Institute for Global Ethics) “Four-way Test)Institute for Global Ethics

18. NAIS Case Study Vignettes Download films: http://client.blueskybroadcast.com/NAIS/case/ http://client.blueskybroadcast.com/NAIS/case/ General Rule of Thumb: “Boards should err on the side of under- involvement in operational matters and over-involvement in reputational matters.” ~Dick Chait A Role Play: What do you say when you get the “concerned parent” call? IGE’s 4-Way Test: 1. gut test; 2. the legal test; 3. front- page test; 4. role-model test. NAIS Case Study #1 : Harsh Transitions in the Second Grade#1: NAIS Case Study #2 : Clash of Styles of Leaders#2 : NAIS Case Study #9 : Administrative Evaluations#9: NAIS Case Study #11 : Digging Deeper for the Campaign#11: NAIS Case Study #13 : Taking Charge…by a Trustee#13: NAIS Case Study #29 : Anonymous Letter from the Faculty#29: NAIS Case Study #30 : Breaking the Rules…by the Adults#30: NAIS Case Study #31 : Admissions Package Deal#31: Z Decision-making manifest (S/N + T/F) in IGE’s 4-way test: i.) gut test ii.) legal test iii.) front page test; iv.) role model test c: d:

19. Highly Functional vs. Dysfunctional Team (What’s your Team’s Functionality Factor?)

20. Five Dysfunctions of a Team Manifest by… Paranoia

21. Five Dysfunctions of a Team

23. Five Elements of Highly Functional Teams

24. 5 Dysfunctions Survey ?s Return

25. Five Dysfunctions of a Team 3 = usually; 2 = sometimes; 1 = rarely 0.0 Our Team’s Average Totals on StatementsStatements (higher scores better)

26. Understanding & Managing Change in Change-Resistant Cultures

27. What Leaders Really Do ~ John Kotter Management: Manages Complexity by… Planning & Budgeting Organizing & Staffing Controlling & Problem- solving Producing predictability, order, and consistency Leadership: Leads Change by… Setting a direction Aligning people Motivating and inspiring Producing useful and dramatic change Examples of a board doing “the right thing”? (i.e., “doing things right”)(i.e., “doing the right things”)

28. NAIS Strategic Planning: Breakout Groups (partnerships; school of future; sustainability, etc.) Why doesn’t anyone want to sit at the innovation table? A risk-averse culture…and client.

29. Seven Stages of the Change Cycle Source: Center for Ethical Leadership (Bill Grace, Pat Hughes, & Pat Turner), Kellogg National Leadership Program Seminar, Snoqualine, WA, 7/10/97. Reference: William Bridges, Transitions; Kurt Lewin, Field Theory in Social Science; Virginia Satir, The Satir Model; George David, Compressed Experience Workplace Simulation; Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, On Death & Dying; Tom Peters, In Search of Excellence.  The research on change indicates that there are predictable stages individuals experience whenever a major change event appears. What are they?  An Exercise:  Identify 2 major change events in your life  Indicate the stages you went through as the change occurred.  As a small group determine what stages you had in common despite differences in the change events you were thinking of.

30. The Seven Stages of the Change Cycle Source: Center for Ethical Leadership (Bill Grace, Pat Hughes, & Pat Turner), Kellogg National Leadership Program Seminar, Snoqualine, WA, 7/10/97. Reference: William Bridges, Transitions; Kurt Lewin, Field Theory in Social Science; Virginia Satir, The Satir Model; George David, Compressed Experience Workplace Simulation; Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, On Death & Dying; Tom Peters, In Search of Excellence. 1. Business as Usual: the routine; the frozen state; the status quo 2. External Threat: potential disaster; propitious change event; an ending; a “death in the family”; an unfreezing via the introduction of a foreign element; disequilibrium; dissatisfaction with the status quo. 3. Denial: refusal to read the Richter scale; anger and rage; chaos.

31. The Seven Stages of the Change Cycle 4. Mourning: confusion; depression. 5. Acceptance: letting go. 6.Renewal: creativity; the incubation state of new ideas and epiphanies; new beginnings; movement; vision of what “better” might look like; reintegration; first practical steps; practice of new routines. 7.New Structure: sustainable change; the new status quo; new “frozen” state of restored equilibrium; spiritual integration; internalization and transformation of self.

32. Overcoming Resistance to Change Conventional Wisdom: Raise the Volume…  Declare war, demonize the enemy, mobilize the public Problems with Raising the Volume in School Culture…  Skepticism: Teachers are intellectuals--declarations of imminent collapse are met with suspicion.  Good is the enemy of great: Jim Collins’ Good to Great. Absence of provoking crisis makes avoidance easy.

33. Overcoming Resistance to Change Problems with Raising the Volume in School Culture…  Success: Track record of independent schools the greatest impediment to change: We can’t declare war when schools are enjoying decades of peace and prosperity. So why advocate change???? Increasingly the public identifies high quality schools with innovativeness, and least identifies innovativeness with independent schools. The independent school model may not be financially sustainable in it current incarnation of skyrocketing tuitions. What’s best for kids needs to be reasserted as institutions almost always over time gravitate towards doing what’s best for adults.

34. Effecting Change Developing Followership for Change:  Coercive model works (“We’re about to close unless all faculty including department chairs teach five classes instead of four with 20-25 kids in each class”)… …but it works at a high cost to morale.  Appeal to idealism works (“We have an opportunity to create a new model here and become pioneers”)… …but it works only if you have a highly committed “band of brothers & sisters” and strong, visionary, and inspirational leadership.

35. Effecting Change Developing Buy-in for Change:  Mutual benefit (“What’s in it for me?”) model works (“Beyond supporting this direction because ‘it’s the right thing to do,’ we are designing a new framework that is mutually beneficial to the school and its staff”)… …but it works only if you build in significant incentives.

36. Effecting Change Alternative to Conventional Wisdom (Raise the Volume)… Lower the Noise… By…  Talking about/Personalizing Change: Anticipating the Seven Stages  Betting on the Fastest Horses

37. Acknowledging Denial & Mourning All change begins not with a beginning but an ending. Example: Getting married = end of… being single unconditional love (cf. Rob Evans) having your own bathroom (and towels) the sports car

38. Effecting Change Abstracting and Personalizing Change Faculty exercise: What are your own major change events? A move? Marriage? Admin job? Can we predict & prepare for stages?

39. Change Agency: Bet on the Fast Horses  Main Impediment to Change: Consensus model of decision making. (“My biggest challenge is convincing my faculty members that they are not self-employed.”) ~Lou Salza  Coalition-building Model: Betting on the Fastest Horses: targeted buy-in via modeling. Ride the “tipping point” horses. (Malcolm Gladwell’s mavens, connectors, and salespeople).  Recruiting “the coalition of the willing.” Margaret Mead Dictum: “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it’s the only thing that ever has.”

40. Overcoming Resistance to Change

41. Immunity to Change What examples in our personal or professional lives do we find ourselves or others “immune to change,” even when we know it’s in our best interests to change?

42. Robert Kegan’s Immunity to Change Well-Intentioned Goals: Case Study 1: Quitting Smoking ----------- Intentions and Actions: The Gap

43. Robert Kegan’s Immunity to Change Well-Intentioned Goals: Behaviors I Do/Don’t Do that Undermine Goal Quitting Smoking

44. Robert Kegan’s Immunity to Change Well-Intentioned Goals: Behaviors I Do/Don’t Do that Undermine Goal Quitting SmokingSneaking an occasional smoke Rewarding myself with a smoke.

45. Robert Kegan’s Immunity to Change Well- Intentioned Goals: Behaviors I Do/Don’t Do that Undermine Goal Invisible Competing Drivers Quitting Smoking Sneaking an occasional smoke Rewarding myself with a smoke.

46. Robert Kegan’s Immunity to Change Well-Intentioned Goals: Behaviors I Do/Don’t Do that Undermine Goal Invisible Competing Drivers Quitting SmokingSneaking an occasional smoke Smoking as pleasurable pastime Rewarding myself with a smoke. Smoking as anxiety reliever Smoking as oral fixation preferable to eating/weight gain Foot on gas……………………and on brake

47. Robert Kegan’s Immunity to Change Well- Intentioned Goals: Behaviors I Do/Don’t Do that Undermine Goal Invisible Competing Drivers Big, Untested Assumptions Behind Col 3 Drivers Quitting Smoking Sneaking an occasional smoke Smoking as pleasurable pastime I can’t find equally pleasurable alternatives Rewarding myself with a smoke. Smoking as anxiety reliever I might become someone who is not me Smoking as oral fixation preferable to eating/weight gain

48. Robert Kegan’s Immunity to Change Well-Intentioned Goals: Case Study 2: Be an Innovator Lead the Change Agenda

49. Robert Kegan’s Immunity to Change Well-Intentioned Goals: Behaviors I Do/Don’t Do that Undermine Goal PFB Case Study 2: Be a Change Agent Lead the Change Agenda

50. Robert Kegan’s Immunity to Change Well-Intentioned Goals: Behaviors I Do/Don’t Do that Undermine Goal Case Study 2: Be a Change Agent Fail to align resources and incentives Lead the Change Agenda Make the case for the rider but not the elephant

51. Robert Kegan’s Immunity to Change Well-Intentioned Goals: Behaviors I Do/Don’t Do that Undermine Goal Invisible Competing Drivers Case Study 2: Be a Change Agent Fail to align resources and incentives Lead the Change Agenda Make the case for the rider but not the elephant

52. Robert Kegan’s Immunity to Change Well-Intentioned Goals: Behaviors I Do/Don’t Do that Undermine Goal Invisible Competing Drivers Be a Change AgentFail to align resources and incentives Keeping peace more important than effecting change Lead the Change Agenda Make the case for the rider but not the elephant Fear that you won’t have followers; that the change won’t work - seen as a failure

53. Robert Kegan’s Immunity to Change Well- Intentioned Goals: Behaviors I Do/Don’t Do that Undermine Goal Invisible Competing Drivers Big, Untested Assumptions Behind Col 3 Drivers Be a Change Agent Fail to align resources and incentives Keeping peace more important than effecting change Lead the Change Agenda Make the case for the rider but not the elephant Fear that the change won’t work - seen as a failure; fear change agent punished

54. Robert Kegan’s Immunity to Change Well-Intentioned Goals: Behaviors I Do/Don’t Do that Undermine Goal Invisible Competing Drivers Big, Untested Assumptions Behind Col 3 Drivers Be a Change Agent Fail to align resources and incentives Keeping peace more important than effecting change No one wants change Lead the Change Agenda Make the case for the rider but not the elephant Fear that the change won’t work - seen as a failure; fear change agent punished Failure will be punished instead of trying being rewarded

55. (Not) The End! What are the 1-3 leadership principles I’d like to work on? 1-3 our team needs to work on? Return

56. Tiananmen Square Return

57. Difficult Conversations between the Head & Board Chair Difficult Conversation Role Plays

58. Difficult Conversations between the Head & Board Chair  School Head to Board Chair: “I’d say that at least half of our board members, mostly current parents, despite all of the articles and board workshops we’ve conducted with the experts, at the end of the day want to weigh in and “fix” problems they and their circle of parents experience or imagine. They really want to do my job, and they shrink away from doing their job, which is to think strategically and advance the school in every way, including fund- raising. I’m about to throw in the towel.”  Board chair to School Head: …

59. Difficult Conversations between the Head & Board Chair  Board chair to head of school: “I know that last summer you and I and the Executive Committee hammered out some goals for the board and some goals for you relative to the strategic plan to be the basis of this year’s evaluation of you as head of school, and so far, so good. But given the recent uproar about the “Black Lives Matter” assembly, there’s some pressure to add some categories to the evaluation. Related to that, there’s a group of trustees who think your evaluation should include a 360 with input that we see from the faculty, staff, parents, and board in terms of your overall leadership style and effectiveness. We do this in our firm, and it’s a clarifying experience. Are you game for these changes in your evaluation process?”  School Head to board chair: …

60. Difficult Conversations between the Head & Board Chair  School Head to Board Chair: “I really appreciate the fact that whenever we discuss very sensitive matters at the board meeting you remind the board that the information is confidential and not to be shared outside of the board room. I’m sorry to report to you that one of the faculty members heard one of our trustees and your wife discussing the matter with some non-board member parents and faculty members in the parking lot. From my perspective, this is a harmful breach of our basic rules of conduct and best practice. Any ideas on how to address it?”  Board chair to school head: …

61. Difficult Conversations between the Head & Board Chair  Board chair to head of school: “Many members of our board have been approached by faculty members and members of your admin team regarding the issue of perceived favoritism in setting salaries. I continue to counsel my colleagues on the board to rebuff these approaches because these are internal matters the head is assigned to address, and not our business to get involved in. But the pattern persists because many say they’ve repeatedly raised the issue with you, but you won’t address it. Help me understand the situation.”  Head to board chair: …

62. Difficult Conversations between the Head & Board Chair  School head to board chair: “The board has made it clear to me that it wants a wholesome, drug and alcohol-free environment a the school, and we’ve strengthened the handbook to extend school reach outside the environs of the school for serious student breaches that break our rules of conduct. As you know, a drug or alcohol citation by the police would now carry with it school disciplinary consequences, as all our students and parents know when they sign the handbook clause as part of the year’s re- enrollment contract. So I want you to know we’ve learned that one of our families is “aiding and abetting” senior class parties at their home under the excuse that it’s better for the drinking (and I suspect the drug use) to be in supervised quarters with no driving allowed, than at large. We need to make an example of this family. But when I’ve mentioned this to a couple of trustees, they’ve warned me off, saying its an overreach on the part of the school. Maybe they think it’s a good idea or maybe their kids are at those parties, I don’t know. What do you think?”  Board chair to school head: …

63. Difficult Conversations between the Head & Board Chair  Board chair to school head: “You know that I understand the difficulty of your position regarding our senior faculty member whose been a legendary contributor at the school or decades. The word on the street is that she’s still sharp, knows the kids and their learning styles, and gets a lot out of them. But apparently she also is increasingly sharp-tongued with them, and parents are perceiving her to be short-tempered, overly strict, and very critical of their children. I know you’re trying to mentor her, but apparently it’s not sticking. And I know she’s an icon among her colleagues. But the board is getting pressure to pressure you to act on this more assertively. Any thoughts?”  Head to board chair: “… Return