1. Chemical Dependency’s Impact on the Family
Jenna Washuleski

2. Audience
Clients going through substance abuse treatment because of their addiction
The client’s family that is affected by the chemical dependency
The general public

3. Objective
In order to develop new strategies to change the family functioning into one that is healthier and more effective, client’s and their family members must reflect on their family functioning and experience, and gain insight into their behavior and family dynamics.
This presentation will help with that process by creating awareness of how one’s chemical dependency affects their family system, and how the family’s behavior influences the chemically dependent member.
(Curtis, 1999)

4. What is Chemical Dependency?
When an individual is addicted to alcohol or other drugs. The person is dependent on the substance, and as the addiction progresses, it not only consumes the person but their family.
Can be multigenerational
A disease that can be the result of one or several issues related to chemical dependency
(Curtis, 1999)

5. Specific Issues Related to Chemical Dependency
Multigenerational dependency
Emotional Abuse
Domestic Violence
Sexual Abuse
Abandonment
Physical or Mental Illnesses
The stage of addiction the dependent and family are in
Whether or not the family targets issue right away or if the family adjusts to the dependency
(Curtis, 1999)

6. Chemical Dependency is a Disease
If chemical dependency is not addressed, it begins to consume each family member which leads to the disruption of internal regulations
Daily Routines (Day to Day Activities)
Family Rituals (Holidays and Traditions)
Problems become easily activated and members often overreact to the context of the problem
It becomes normal to blame others for problems to avoid resolution
Short-Term Problem Solving
(Curtis, 1999)

7. Short-Term Problem Solving
Accommodation and adaption to the chemical dependency – Focus on short-term stability
Isolation of the dependent member from others with intentions to protect dependent’s reputation – “If you don’t see it, it isn’t there.”
Denial – “If it’s ignored, it will go away.”
Accept behavior due to chemical dependency in previous generations – “It’s inevitable”
Short-term problem solving prevents families from attempting an effective solution
(Curtis, 1999)

8. Disruption to the Family’s Developmental Process
When chemical dependency becomes known in the family, there are two options:
Challenge the associated behavior
Adapt short-term problem solving techniques and accommodate to the dependent
Families that chose to adjust to the dependent’s behavior could experience one or all of three phases of families with chemical dependency
The early phase, the middle phase, and the late phase
(Curtis, 1999)

9. The Early Phase
All other issues in the family tend to become ignored when chemical dependency arises
Family begins to revolve around managing drug-affected behavior
Typically, only select members of the family are aware of the dependency
Former generations effect whether or not this behavior will be tolerated
Members may have developed patterns based on previous chemical dependency in the Family
(Curtis, 1999)

10. The Early Phase The challenge now is whether the family:
Accepts chemical dependency as a “fact of life” and adjusts to the behavior
Makes effort to effectively target this issue
Typically, families begin to focus on the member’s chemical dependency, but overtime, the family eventually adapts to the behavior.
The family then moves to the middle phase
(Curtis, 1999)

11. The Middle Phase
Currently, the dependency plays a central role in the family. It becomes the family’s sense of self and controls the family life
Family members adapt their lives around the dependent’s use and behaviors
The dependent does not do the same
The major task is committing to a set of family norms that will maintain stability
Prevent the family from long-term growth
Members have immensely adapted to the chemical dependence instead of challenging it
Family is developmentally inflexible and distorted
(Curtis, 1999)

12. The Late Phase
By now, the perspective on substance abuse and the beliefs and values regarding substance abuse are incorporated into the “family culture” and is transmitted to the children in the family
Major tasks are developing a plan for the future.
The family can only maintain short-term stability for so long
Chemically dependent families may not reach this point of change until a crisis has forced them to confront their problem
The family discusses different options they can take
Four Distinct Pathways
(Curtis, 1999)

13. 1) The Stable Wet Dependent Family
Requires the least amount of energy
Initially, the family takes a firm stance and indicates there will be consequences for dependency
May threaten to leave or create crisis to force an end to dependency
There is no change rebuild the structure of the family
When the chemically dependent member doesn’t meet the expectations, the family loses the ability and will to change
(Curtis, 1999)

14. 2) The Stable Wet or Controlled Use Nondependent Family
This option allows the members to no longer have chemical dependency be the focus of the family and apart of the family’s identity
The chemically dependent member’s substance abuse does not stop but it reduces to stable or controlled use of substances
(Curtis, 1999)

15. 3) The Stable Dry Dependent Family
The dependent member successfully stops using substances, but that is the only thing that changed
Family members have established behavior patterns around chemical dependency and it continues to be central role in the family identity
(Curtis, 1999)

16. 4) The Stable Dry Nondependent Family
This option consist of both the chemical dependency has stopped and the family has moved past drug related issues.
Some families just “no longer focus on drug-related behavior and issues… And make no particular commitment to reorganize the family
For other families, all members make a proactive effort to significantly make changes individually and as a family
Members know that the end of dependency doesn’t solve their problems and that an effort for reorganization and transformation of family members will benefit the family
(Curtis, 1999)

17. Critical Issues in Chemically Dependent Families
Child Abuse
“Alcohol- and drug-abusing parents were 3 times likelier to abuse their children and 4 times likelier to neglect them than parents who did not abuse these substances (CASA, 2005).”
Abuse can be physical sexual abuse, overt sexual abuse, covert sexual abuse, and emotional sexual abuse
Very traumatizing and is linked to issues in their adult years
Internalizes a sense of shame related to childhood abuse
(Curtis, 1999)

18. Critical Issues in Chemically Dependent Families
Shame
Major factor identified wit chemically dependent systems
“An inner sense of being completely diminished or insufficient as a person… the ongoing premise that one is fundamentally bad, inadequate, defective, unworthy, or not fully valid as a human being”
Shame-bound systems show addictive, compulsive, abusive, and anxious/irrational behavior
Dependence is a result of shame. Shame typically derives from childhood, likely from a chemically dependent parent, which shows how chemical dependence can be multigenerational
(Curtis, 1999)

19. Family Survival Roles
Each member may make assumptions about his or her personal responsibility for the dependent’s use and increasing family dysfunction.
Internalized pain and anger are developed from guilt and failed attempts to make things better
To protect themselves from further pain, family members develop various survival roles to cope with the increasing conflicts stemmed from dependency
Survival roles are used as a defense mechanism to cover up and protect the painful feeling their actually experiencing and to make them ‘fit’ within the unit.
(Curtis, 1999)

20. Family Survival Roles
“As an individual’s protective barriers intensify and strengthen, the entire family grows more out of touch with the reality of their emotions. As the dependent person’s compulsion to use grows, so does the dysfunction between the dependent’s behavior and the family’s reactionary compulsive coping behavior.”
The characteristics of survival techniques are broken down into six different roles between the family
(Curtis, 1999)

21. The Chemically Dependent Person
Does not correlate internal and external issues with their dependent behavior
“As the disease progresses, this person loses more and more personal control, not only of actual usage but also of behavior”
As a result, the person internalizes feelings of shame, guilt, inadequacy, fear, and loneliness
Doesn’t necessary live in the reality of what is actually occurring
(Curtis, 1999)

22. The Chemically Dependent Person
Tries to project or place others responsible for their dependency and family problems
Is usually not aware of their increasing dysfunction, but notices their relationship changing with others in the family
Their sense of responsibility in the family decreases
Takes on defensive behaviors and characteristics as a result of their disease
Denial, rationalization, and minimization
Other defenses that are displayed are irrational behavior, charm, rigidity, grandiosity, perfectionism, social withdrawal, threats, hostility, and depression
(Curtis, 1999)

23. The Codependent
Is the closest person to the chemically dependent person
Is usually the first family member to react to dysfunctionally to dependent’s behavior
Is protective of dependent, makes excuses, rationalizes behavior, and tends to make personal sacrifices for the dependent
Assumes the responsibility for dependent’s emotional well-being and decision making
Self-worth begins to correlate with the dependent’s chemical use
(Curtis, 1999)

24. The Codependent
Member thinks they are the reason for the chemical dependency
“If I caused it, I must be able to cure it.”
Members feel guilt and self-blame when there is an increase in dependency
“If only I would have done this.”
Declining self-worth results to emotional isolation, loneliness, internalized feelings of pain, anger, and low self-esteem which result in the member becoming more compulsive
(Curtis, 1999)

25. Difference Between The Codependent and an Enabler
Enabling is “anything done to protect the chemically depended person from suffering the consequences of, or makes allowances for, his or her behavior.”
Both prevent the dependent person from acknowledging the severity of the behavior
The codependent consumes themselves with and is very close with the dependent; whereas, the enabler does not require an on going relationship
The codependent becomes a victim of the disease
(Curtis, 1999)

26. The Family Hero Generally the oldest child
Works in close alliance with the codependent
Sees and hears more than other children in the family
Feels most responsible for the family plan and improving the family situation
Often excels in personal endeavors and is a perfectionist
May be a workaholic
Most likely to work in the helping profession
Continuously seeks approval of family
When it is not achieved, member typically develops independent lifestyle away from family
(Curtis, 1999)

27. The Scapegoat
Is noticeably the “tip of the iceberg of stress experienced by the family”
Has disruptive behavior
Demands urgent attention from family
Stress creates too much effort for other members
Destructive behavior has become apart of their lifestyle; therefore, the individual and family’s energy loss is not even noticed
Family often blames the scapegoat for being responsible for family’s dysfunctional state
Distracts family from the main issue – the chemical dependency
(Curtis, 1999)

28. The Scapegoat
Is aware of the unhealthy relationship between the hero, the chemically dependent, and the codependent members.
Is accused of not caring about the good of the family, labeled as disloyal
Feels rejected and alone in the family
May separate themself from family and may consider suicide
Has built up anger and resentment making it hard to keep a job or build relationships with others
Feels jealously toward the hero
Defense behaviors are self-pity, strong peer values, defiance, and hostility
Chemical dependency and criminal activity are not uncommon, especially at an early age
(Curtis, 1999)

29. The Mascot
Distracts members and relieves tension by using humor and fun
Feels good making members laugh during difficult times
Acts as family pet
Characteristic defense behaviors are hyperactivity, charm, being super cute, and doing anything to get a laugh or be at the center of attention
Avoids pain through humorous control
Being the center of attention develops a sense of power in the family
(Curtis, 1999)

30. The Mascot Feels alone, low self-esteem
No one knows the real person
“No one sees the tears behind the clowns mask”
Most members do not take the mascot to seriously
If the mascot shows sadness, it is seen as lack of intimacy
Fails to show true emotion for the fear of being rejected and upsetting others
Develops into an immature and insecure adult that is unable to seriously recognize and express feelings
(Curtis, 1999)

31. The Loner Is liked by everyone in the family
Has much in common with the scapegoat
Both feel insignificant and unimportant within the family
Finds it easy to distance themself from the family
Stays on the outside of the family, rather than becoming involved in it
Builds a private world
Privacy creates isolation from family which results in broken promises, exclusion from family activities, and doesn’t get certain information by other members
(Curtis, 1999)

32. The Loner May experience problems with
Being under- or overweight
Physical and emotional distances
Promiscuity and sexual dysfunction
Sexual identity problems
Characteristically has difficulties developing close relationships in their personal life
As an adult, is most likely to be
Highly independent
Quiet
Extremely creative
As a result of childhood dreams of having the perfect family
Attached to things and being materialistic
(Curtis, 1999)

33. The Chemically Dependent Family Survival Roles
Are distinct, but members can switch roles
For example, “the hero is a natural step into the codependent role”
All family members are victims of the dependency
Members should take the responsibility to change this
Children rarely have a choice
Children cannot prevent being victims but can be benefited by developing one of these six roles
(Curtis, 1999)

34. Children of Chemically Dependent Families
“Parents who used tobacco or illegal drugs or abused alcohol put half the nation’s children—more than 35 million of them—at greater risk of substance abuse and other physical and mental illnesses." The report found that of all children under age 18:
13% lived in a household where a parent or other adult used illicit drugs
24% lived in a household where a parent or other adult was a binge or heavy drinker
37% lived in a household where a parent or other adult smoked or chewed tobacco 
(CASA, 2005)

35. Children of Chemically Dependent Families
“Children in dependent homes learn to not feel, not trust, and not talk about the family’s problems. As a result, they shut down emotionally.”
Growing up in this environment was typically not fun and the child could develop severe trauma
Socializing for them is difficult
Children of dependent families are ore likely to develop behavioral disorders, depression, or anxiety than other children
These characteristics increase their risk to smoke, drink, and use other drugs
Their hopes, wishes, and plans were often set aside or forgotten
Are taught conditional love
Have an increased risk of accidents, injuries, and academic failure
(Curtis, 1999)
(CASA, 2005)

36. Adult Children of Chemically Dependent Families
A person will remain a victim of their past if he/she continues to allow it
It becomes a matter of personal responsibility for an adult to work through painful issues in order to let go of the past
If adult does not work on this deep issue, the member will be attached to this past and to those that have inflicted the pain
(Curtis, 1999)

37. These Adult Children tend to…
Have difficulties in intimate relationships
Have a deep fear of abandonment or rejection
Be controlling, rigid, and lacking in impulsiveness.
Over react to changes that they have no control over and judge themselves harshly based on standards that were internalized from childhood
Have great ideas, but procrastinate and have difficulty completing projects
Identify with what they do and how well they do it, and not from who they are
(Curtis, 1999)

38. Ten Ways Family Members Can Help
Educate yourself
Addicts thrive in an environment of ignorance and denial
See the member as a “sick person” and not a “bad person”
Talk to someone professional and attend open meetings to learn recovering addicts’ personal experience
Don’t try to rescue the dependent member
It is crucial that the member experiences the consequences of their behavior
Don’t financially support the addiction
Don’t try to analyze the reason for chemical dependence
Say what you mean, and mean what you say
Don’t make false threats, actions speak louder than words
(TCC, n.d.)

39. Ten Ways The Family Can Help (Cont.)
Don’t expect them to follow through with promises
Don’t preach or lecture to them
Avoid the reactions of pity or anger
Do not accommodate the disease
Members should not putting all their energy on the chemical dependency
Don’t forget to take care of yourself and your own needs
This is a complex disease where professional support is highly encouraged
(TCC, n.d.)

40. Therapy and Treatment
Al-Anon has been a powerful influence for recovery
Narcotics and Alcoholics Anonymous meetings
Individual therapy
Family therapy based on any of the family systems theories and methods
(Curtis, 1999)

41. The Recovery Process
Understand that this is a highly emotional process for all members of the family
It is not an easy process and that it takes time
If it therapy doesn’t work at a particular time, that doesn’t mean it won’t work in the future
Along with family therapy, the chemically dependent member should have their own individual therapy
(Curtis, 1999)

42. Maintaining Successful Recovery
Members should focus on their individual needs and continue therapy
Members should know how to healthily demonstrate coping mechanisms during dysfunctional periods
Confront conflict when it arises instead of ignoring or adapting to it
(Curtis, 1999)

43. Exercise: How is Your Family Impacted by Chemical Dependency?
Does one or more family member have chemical dependency?
Does it affect the family’s daily routines and family rituals?
Do members use short-term problem solving to achieve stability?
Has your family gone through one or more of the three phases based on how chemical dependency impacts the developmental stages?
(Curtis, 1999)

44. Exercise: How is Your Family Impacted by Chemical Dependency?
Has your family experienced any of the four distinct pathways in an attempt to achieve stability?
Do any of your family members fit the characteristics of the six survival roles? What role do you identify with?
Do you believe recovery and therapy will benefit you and your family?
(Curtis, 1999)

45. If so, It’s Not too Late!
Do not wait for a crisis to happen before your family decides it is time to change. Continuing to achieve short-term stability is preventing the family from progressing forward. The only way to achieve a healthier way of life is for the members to confront their problems. By doing this, members will communicate and function more effectively as a whole. This is a highly emotional experience, but it will be worth it in the end. Do not let chemical dependence control you and your family’s life anymore!
(Curtis, 1999)

47. Resources
Curtis, O. (1999). Chemical Dependency's Disruption of Organization. In Chemical dependency: A Family Affair (1st ed., Vol. 1, pp ). Pacific Grove, CA: Brooks/Cole Pub
Curtis, O. (1999). Critical Issues in Chemically Dependent Families. In Chemical dependency: A Family Affair (1st ed., Vol. 1, pp ). Pacific Grove, CA: Brooks/Cole Pub
TCC. (n.d.). The Counseling Center. The Family Role. Ten Ways Family Members Can Help. Retrieved December 1, 2014, from .html
CASA. (2005, March 1). Ending Addiction Changes Everything. Family Matters: Substance Abuse and The American Family. Retrieved December 1, 2014, from research/reports/family-matters-substance-abuse-and-american- family