Presentation on theme: "You Professional !! Are you a Good Parent?... Dr. SHAVINDRA R.DIAS MBBS,MD Psych.(colombo) Dip in Psychol.,BA(Oxon UK) Senior Lecturer in Psychiatry Department."— Presentation transcript:
You Professional !! Are you a Good Parent?... Dr. SHAVINDRA R.DIAS MBBS,MD Psych.(colombo) Dip in Psychol.,BA(Oxon UK) Senior Lecturer in Psychiatry Department of Psychiatry Faculty of Medicine University of Peradeniya Kandy, Sri Lanka
We want our children to behave well, and to: ■ have respect for themselves and others; ■ be polite to others; ■ know how to behave in different situations; ■ be able to concentrate and pay attention; ■ share and to take turns; ■ know how to win and how to lose;
But children often behave quite differently, and we may feel annoyed, frustrated and embarrassed. Parents of teenage children or children with a disability may face additional challenges and pressures.
Authoritarian Style Parent – Not involved or responsive, but set strict limits – Expect children to follow strict rules – Does not explain why rules should be obeyed – Punish children who disobey rules – Are controlling/power-oriented – Use verbal threats or spanking Child Children lack social competence Mental illness and abuse Obedient Proficient (Good at what they do) May view parent as enemy May be confused about what is right/wrong Have levels happiness & self-esteem
Permissive Style Parent Child – Very involved and responsive, but don’t set limits – Has no firm rules, lenient – Accepts child as he/she is – Disciplines through love, praise and affection – Communicates and nurtures child – Acts more like a friend than parent Dependent Irresponsible / Lacks self-control Immature Experiences problems with authority Experiences problems in school (i.e. completing projects)
Neglectful Style Parent Child – Makes few demands – Low responsiveness to child – Detached from child, but fulfills his/her basic needs – In extreme cases parents REJECT or NEGLECT needs of child Children not well adjusted; resentful Feel neglected / abandoned, have self-esteem Lack self-control
Authoritative Style Parent – Very involved and responsive, but set limits – Supportive of child’s decisions – Child centered; foster independence – Guides and shows by example – Willing to discuss choices they or their child makes and the reasoning behind these choices – Disciplinary methods are nurturing & forgiving Child Well adjusted children Good decision makers Independent, but seek help when needed Happy Capable Successful
Parenting Styles Demandingness (control) High Low AuthoritativePermissive NeglectfulAuthoritarian High Low Responsiveness (involvement)
Tip 2: Understand Changes As They Grow Exploring: Independence: Encouragement Consider the age of child. Use age-appropriate methods
Tip 3: Set Boundaries Set Reasonable limits; do not set them too high or too low Children need clear rules, boundaries and routine. Word the instructions positively. Be consistent. If you make promises keep them. Be true to your word.
Tip 4: Reward and Notice Good Behaviour Rewards do not have to be material things. Real praise and encouragement is the best reward as it can boost a child and build self- esteem and confidence
Think practically about the applicability of disciplinary actions, and let children know that you are serious. Flexibility is fine – life can be chaotic and having a flexible approach will help your children learn to do the same.
Do not punish accidents. Give a second chance. Let bygones be bygones.