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Multi-Paragraph Essay:

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1 Multi-Paragraph Essay:
Jane Schaffer Writing Teaching the Multi-Paragraph Essay:

2 Jane Schaffer Background
Jane Schaffer Curriculum materials for novels, composition and mythology can be found at: Jane Schaffer Publications offers tested and proven curriculum materials for composition and literature. The guides have been successful in grades 7 through 12, at all ability levels. For many decades, in English classrooms, writing instruction tended to follow a pattern: teachers assigned essays each Monday, collected them the following Friday, and in the meantime, devoted class time to other activities including reading and discussing literature. Students turned in their essays at the end of the week, teachers graded them over the weekend and returned them the following Monday. Most students would glance at the grade, ignore carefully written comments, and file their work in their notebooks (at best) or the trash can (at worst). Then the cycle would repeat itself.

3 Jane Schaffer Terminology Types of writing include:
Essay – a piece of writing that gives thoughts (commentary) about a subject. Types of writing include: CLASSIFICATORY: To Inform The first term defined is an essay. There are different types of essays that we teach for Standards PERSUASIVE: To Persuade DESCRIPTIVE: To Describe

4 Jane Schaffer Terminology
Essays must be a minimum of 4 paragraphs including the following parts: I: Intro 40+ words II: 1st body paragraph (100 + words) III: 2nd body paragraph (100 + words) IV: Concluding paragraph 40+ words) The Schaffer model should include an outline and graphic of what the essay looks like. Students often need a visual layout- or guideline. Essays must be a minimum of 4 paragraphs long – Intro, 2 body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Without the diagram, students may indent every sentence, forget to indent at all, or merge all paragraphs together as one.

5 Jane Schaffer Terminology
Overview: Steps in the Writing Process: Pre-Writing 2. Shaping the Essay 3. First Draft 4. Peer Response 5. Revision 6. Final Draft Students need to see the “big picture” of the writing program to realize that all of the pieces they will learn are connected. We tell them that they will be taking notes on 18 terms and definitions and break the list into two parts: Steps in the Writing Process and Parts of the Essay.

6 Jane Schaffer Terminology
Introductory Paragraph 2. Thesis 3. Body Paragraph 4. Topic Sentence 5. Concrete Detail 6. Commentary 7. Chunk 8. Concluding Sentence 9. Conclusion Paragraph Parts of the Essay: Students are introduced to the essay format and students get a copy of it. They won’t necessarily understand all of it, but they will have a sense of where the unit is going.

7 Jane Schaffer Terminology
Thesis – a sentence with a subject and opinion. Often appears at the end of introductory paragraph. (#2) Students are guided through the process of recognizing and writing a thesis sentence. A thesis is a sentence with an a subject and opinion. Students practice writing and identifying thesis sentences.

8 Jane Schaffer Terminology
Pre-writing – the process of getting concrete Details on paper before organizing paragraphs. Prewriting is the process of getting concrete details down on paper before organizing an essay into paragraphs. After thesis instruction, time is spent teaching the different ways to pre-write: bubble clusters, spider diagrams, outlines, line clusters, and columns.

9 Prewriting - Bubble Clusters
Jane Schaffer Writing Prewriting - Bubble Clusters BBQ Stay up Late Time with Siblings Daily Routine Family SUMMER TIME The first method is bubble clusters. It is also called mapping, webbing and clustering. Many teacher have learned this approach through the National Writing Project sites across the country. Students come well-trained in this method. Bubble clusters are not effective with everyone. The Schaffer materials come with detailed instructions for labeling the types of prewriting. Movies Vacation Pleasure Reading

10 Prewriting - SPIDER Clusters
Jane Schaffer Writing Prewriting - SPIDER Clusters Time with Siblings Stay up Late and sleep in BBQ SUMMER TIME Daily Routine Family Another method is spider diagrams. They are laid out on the page like bubble clusters, but they use straight lines instead of circles. Some students feel more comfortable with the linear, horizontal/vertical layout rather than the circular one. Pleasure Reading Movies Vacation

11 I. II. III. Jane Schaffer Writing Prewriting - Outline Outline
Getting A Computer I. II. I. Picking One Out A. Comparison Shopping B. Talking to Sales persons Outline III. Outlining is another method. Some students prefer this approach because they like to move from top to bottom or left to right. The elaborate Roman numeral-Arabic letter structure is not required as long as students indent properly and keep their ideas, flexibility is allowed. II. Setting it Up A. Tried to Read the Manual B. Friend came into Teach

12 Prewriting - Columns Jane Schaffer Writing TWO CHARACTERS
ALIKE DIFFERENT 1. 2. 3. 1. 2. 3. Another method is columns. This approach combines a linear form like spider diagrams with vertical columns for listing ideas. This method often produces the greatest number of concrete details because students fill whatever space given. Here is an example of a Likenesses/Differences column chart.

13 Prewriting - Columns Jane Schaffer Writing BEING FAMOUS
ADVANTAGES DISADVANTAGES 1. 2. 3. 1. 2. 3. Other columns may include Advantages/Disadvantages or FOR/AGAINST columns.

14 Prewriting - Columns Jane Schaffer Writing 1. MY TWO BEST FRIENDS
2. CHERYL JOE Known since first grade Have four classes together Lives down the street. Take martial arts class with 3. Students often comment that they didn’t know they had a choice of prewriting techniques and they feel more confident because they have more options that may appeal to them.

15 1 part concrete detail (CD) and
Jane Schaffer Writing Ratio the ration of 1 part concrete detail (CD) and 2 parts commentary (CM) Of all the skills students learn in this writing unit, commentary is the most difficult. Writing commentary means giving an opinion, interpretation, insight, analysis, personal reaction, feelings, or reflection about a topic. Students must write two or more points of commentary (CM) for every concrete detail (CD) in a body paragraph. We write this ratio as CD:CM 1:2+ CD : CM 1 : 2

16 Jane Schaffer Terminology
Introduction – the first paragraph in an essay. It includes the thesis, most often at the end. (#1) The introduction is the first paragraph in an essay. It includes the thesis, most often at the end of the paragraph. Students begin their essay after becoming familiar with the steps of the writing process by this time they can focus on the more difficult contrete detail and commentary within personal papers.

17 Jane Schaffer Terminology
a middle paragraph in an essay used to develop a point and support the thesis. (#3) The body paragraph has a

18 Jane Schaffer Writing Shaping the Essay done after the prewriting and before the first draft of an essay. It’s an OUTLINE of a THESIS, TS, CD, CM ideas (#2 top) Two or three days are taken to “shape” the essay. Depending on the needs of the class. Students use anyone of a number of formats, or their own paper for this process.

19 Topic Sentence the first sentence in a body paragraph.
Jane Schaffer Writing Topic Sentence the first sentence in a body paragraph. (#4) Topic sentences require thought and practice.

20 Jane Schaffer Writing Concrete Details (#5) Examples Facts Details
Specifics Statistics Illustrations Students will say that they can’t tell the difference between concrete detail and commentary. It is a difficult skill for anyone that demands extra effort. They can distinguish between the two, despite their misgivings or initial lack of confidence. Concrete details include examples, facts, details, specifics, statistics, illustrations.

21 Jane Schaffer Writing Commentary (#6) Opinions Supporting sentences
Explanation Commentary is a difficult skill to master because all the thoughts must from from the student Students are “commenting on” a point they have made. Commentary echoes the focus in the thesis and topic sentences.

22 ONE Concrete Detail (CD)
Jane Schaffer Writing Chunk ONE Concrete Detail (CD) and TWO Commentary (CM). (#7)

23 Jane Schaffer Writing PRACTICE:
Sentence 1: (TS) The walls in this room are dull and boring. Sentence 2: (CD) For example, Ms. Yen only has about 4 posters in her room. Students practice simple and more complex skills of developing “chunks”. Sentence 3: (CM) This proves that the walls reflect Ms. Yen’s uncreative personality. Sentence 4: (CM) Both Ms. Yen and her room are plain and unexciting.

24 Jane Schaffer Writing PRACTICE:
Sentence 1: (TS) Shirley Jackson uses mood and tone to provide suspense in her short stories. Sentence 2: (CD) For example, she uses an ordinary tone in “The Lottery.” Practice can include literary concrete detail and commentary as well as personal concrete detail and commentary. Sentence 3: (CM) This shows that Jackson is successful in making her readers feel shock at the end of her stories. Sentence 4: (CM) She is a great at writing short stories.

25 PRACTICE: One body Paragraph
Jane Schaffer Writing PRACTICE: One body Paragraph Sentence 1: (TS) Ms. Yen is a great teacher. Sentence 2: (CD): For example, she posts our grades frequently. Sentence 3: (CM) She obviously cares for her students. Sentence 4: (CM)She wants all her students to succeed. Sentence 5: (CD)Another example, Ms. Yen tries and makes time for her students. Sentence 6: (CM: She is understanding and kind Sentence 7: (CM) Ms. Yen loves all her students. Sentence 8: (CS) There should be more teachers like Ms. Yen. Practice can include literary concrete detail and commentary as well as personal concrete detail and commentary.

26 Jane Schaffer Writing Concluding Sentence- the last sentence in a body paragraph. (#8) ALL COMMENTARY DOES Not include KEYWORDS from the paragraph Gives a finished feeling to the paragraph

27 Jane Schaffer Terminology
Concluding Paragraph – may sum up ideas, reflect on what was said in the essay, give more commentary, or a personal statement about the subject. (#9) ALL COMMENTARY Gives A Finished Feeling To The Essay Does Not Repeat Keywords From The Paper Or Intro.

28 Jane Schaffer Writing BODY PARAGRAPH SAMPLE TS = Topic Sentence
CD = Concrete Detail CM = Commentary <-- Chunk Cm = Commentary CM = Commentary <-- Chunk CS = Closing Sentence Before students start writing their own commentary, they should understand the format. For the first few “training” essays, there is an 8-sentence requirement for body paragraphs. When they are ready to leave the format, they may weave themselves from the sentence requirement and WEAVE concrete detail and commentary as long as they adhere to the ratio.

29 Jane Schaffer Writing AUDIENCE
many of the same factors which affect the writer also affect the audience age social class education

30 Jane Schaffer Writing PEER RESPONSE

31 A – Brilliant/Excellent A – Brilliant/Excellent
Essay Scoring Guide A – Brilliant/Excellent Format includes excellent concrete detail Format includes insightful commentary Find corrections Organization is clear and logical Very few, if any mechanical errors Excellent sentence variety Correct and skillful use of transitions Repeats little or not at all A – Brilliant/Excellent Format includes excellent concrete detail Format includes insightful commentary Find corrections Organization is clear and logical Very few, if any mechanical errors Excellent sentence variety Correct and skillful use of transitions Repeats little or not at all

32 Jane Schaffer Writing Title Introduction Body Paragraphs Conclusion
Thesis statement Body Paragraphs TS CD CM CS Conclusion


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