1. Andrew L. Urich, J.D. Associate Professor of Legal Studies in Business Oklahoma State University aurich@okstate.edu www.andrewurich.com 405.744.8619 Influence Skills The Power of Influence

2. www.andrewurich.com Can I Influence You? McDonald’s Coffee Case Is $3 Million Reasonable?

3. www.andrewurich.com Idea #1 The Facts Don’t Matter……… If No One Believes You The FACTS don’t matter! – Politics – Marketing vs. Finance Literally a matter of life and death. Ability to influence is a key to success.

4. www.andrewurich.com Idea #2 People Are Annoying I am a hypocrite. I play favorites. I interpret rules in a way that benefits me. I have been known to ignore rules that get in my way. I like people better if they like me.

5. www.andrewurich.com Idea #2 People Are Annoying I like my ideas better just because they’re mine. I think it’s fun to say “no” when I have the power to do so. You cannot change how I see the world. It is important to me to look good in the eyes of others. I don’t even know 1/10 th of 1% about anything, but I think I know everything.

6. www.andrewurich.com Idea #2 People Are Annoying I like to be “right.” I love to say “I told you so.” I hate to admit I’m wrong even in those rare situations when it looks like I might be. Here’s how I make decisions: I decide what I want the answer to be – and then make up the logical reasons to support my decision.

7. www.andrewurich.com Idea #3 Conflict Is Underrated Everyone wants to participate in decisions that affect them. Dispersion of power causes conflict and growing pains. Conflict identifies opportunities for improvement.

8. www.andrewurich.com Idea #4 Authority Is OUT – Influence Is IN Use competence and commitment instead of position and status. Team building and leadership are not based on authority. We are influencing all of the time – positively or negatively. The sign in PS 101 My daughter wants to go to Vegas Authority at Tinker Air Force Base

9. www.andrewurich.com Idea #5 When is “Sucking Up” actually “Sucking Up?” It’s not what you say….it’s how you make them feel. My neighbor’s pictures Baby pictures The IT people

10. www.andrewurich.com The Advantage of Ethical Influence “A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.” -- Mark Twain

11. www.andrewurich.com Keys to Influence & Informal Negotiation  Strategy for Success: Plan in advance!  A little preparation saves the day.  It’s not always what you do say – it’s often what you don’t say.

12. www.andrewurich.com Keys to Influence Strategy for Success: Five Factors for Planning 1.Overcome communication blockers. (First, get them to listen) 2. Look for win/win opportunities (manage self-interest). 3.Become a persuasive messenger. (Be likeable and look the part) 4.Don’t create conflicts and confrontations. (Make them feel good about you) 5.Get control of information and misinformation. (It’s not all about the facts…but facts are important)

13. COMMUNICATION BLOCKERS If They Aren’t Listening… It Doesn’t Matter What You Say.

14. www.andrewurich.com Communication Blockers Multiple Choice Question a)U.S.D.A. b)A.A.A.E. c)OSU Ag College d)K Fed

15. www.andrewurich.com Communication Blockers Multiple Choice Question a)U.S.D.A. b)A.A.A.E. c)OSU Ag College d)K Fed

16. www.andrewurich.com Limit the Impact of Your Point of View Are you impacted by experience? (Driving Rule of Relativity) Are you assuming everyone should think like you? Could you be wrong?

17. www.andrewurich.com Overcome the Bias of Others What stereotypes might they have about you? How can you outflank their bias? People can only hear and incorporate things they understand.

18. www.andrewurich.com Learn to Open Closed Minds Things are exactly as people choose to see them. Is it important enough to care? Value diversity.

19. Win/Win Opportunities Managing the Impact of Self Interest.

20. www.andrewurich.com Factor in the Interests of Both Sides How will the other person profit from your relationship? Can you make the other person’s job easier? Can you help the other person appear better in the eyes of his/her superiors?

21. www.andrewurich.com Win/Win Make the Pie Bigger Instead of Arguing About How to Slice It Win/Win is an attitude. – 62% believe in the fixed pie fallacy. – Pay close attention to their concerns. – Use creativity, diligence and enthusiasm to identify new options.

22. Become a Persuasive Manager Be Likeable and Look the Part!

23. www.andrewurich.com Learn to Become EVEN More Likeable We prefer to comply with the requests of people we like. We like, trust, and believe people who like us.

24. www.andrewurich.com Learn to Become More Likeable It’s not fair– but people judge you by your appearance. Well-Dressed People are Perceived As: – More productive – Responsible – Personally acceptable – More intelligent – More honest – Hardworking – Taking their job seriously – Being raised properly

25. www.andrewurich.com Learn to Become More Likeable Consistently search for similarities between yourself and those with which you deal. Develop the habit of giving sincere compliments. Familiarity and contact enhance liking.

26. www.andrewurich.com Learn to Become More Likeable Listening and taking an interest in the other person Friendliness Body language – smiling, nodding, leaning in, eye contact People like optimistic and enthusiastic people.

27. Avoid Conflict and Confrontations Make Them Feel Good About You.

28. www.andrewurich.com You Will Never Prove Them Wrong Have you ever done it before? Would you rather be right, or would you rather be happy? How would you feel if someone proved you wrong?

29. www.andrewurich.com Avoid Confrontations What they say – has a lot to do with what you already said. Their life experience is different than yours. Focus on the issue – don’t make it personal. Be very considerate.

30. www.andrewurich.com Keys to Influence Strategy for Success: Five Factors for Planning 1.Overcome communication blockers. (First, get them to listen) 2. Look for win/win opportunities (manage self-interest). 3.Become a persuasive messenger. (Be likeable and look the part) 4.Don’t create conflicts and confrontations. (Make them feel good about you) 5.Get control of information and misinformation. (It’s not all about the facts…but facts are important)

31. www.andrewurich.com Summary of Influence and Persuasion The Ten Most Important Things to Remember 1. The most important thing – do they like you? 2. The other most important thing – break through communication blockers. 3. Authority is out – influence is in. 4. Planning influence opportunities in advance can lead you to great success. 5.Look for Win/win opportunities.

32. www.andrewurich.com 6. You have a point of view. 7. Do not underestimate self-interest. 8.You will never prove them wrong. 9.It’s not what you say….it’s how you make them feel. 10. Good relationships provide power, security and success! Summary of Influence and Persuasion The Ten Most Important Things to Remember

33. www.andrewurich.com Thank You Please keep in touch. aurich@okstate.edu www.andrewurich.com I Like You!

34. www.andrewurich.com References Ailes, Roger. You Are the Message. New York. Doubleday, 1988. Cialdini, Robert B. Influence: Science and Practice. 3rd Ed. New York: Harper Collins, 1993. Cohen, Herb. You Can Negotiate Anything. Secaucus, N.J.: Lyle Stuart, 1980 Covey, Stephen R. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. New York: Simon & Schuster, 1989. Dayton, Doug. Selling Microsoft. Holbrook, MA., Adams Media Corporation, 1997. Fisher, Roger and William Ury. Getting to Yes. New York: Viking Penguin, Inc., 1981. Forsyth, Patrick. The Negotiator's Pocketbook. London: Alresford Press Ltd., 1993. Johnson, Spencer. The One Minute Sales Person. William Morrow, N.Y, 1984. Karrass, Chester L. Give and Take. New York: Harper Collins, 1993. Karrass, Chester L. The Negotiating Game. New York: Harper Collins, 1992. Kozicki, Stephen. The Creative Negotiator. Pyrmont, Australia: Gower, 1993. Lewicki, Roy J., et.al. Negotiation. 2nd Edition. Burr Ridge, Il.: Irwin, 1994. Nierenberg, Gerald 1. The Art of Negotiating. New York: Barnes & Noble, 1995. Paul, Richard. Critical Thinking. Santa Rosa, CA: Foundation for Critical Thinking, 1993. Schoonmaker, Alan N. Negotiate to Win: Gaining the Psychological Edge. Englewood Cliffs, N.J.: Prentice Hall, 1989.