What is Counseling? A relationship building process A teaching tool to aid the youth with situational –Problem solving –Decision making Teaching-Family philosophical component
WHY COUNSEL? Counseling helps build relationships between treatment providers and the youth. Counseling helps solve day-to-day problems. Examples: Other
When not to counsel When teaching a new skill When dealing with a skill deficiency When youth exhibits avoidance behavior Rule violation During an intensive situation When youth complains about "unfair"
When to Counsel When a problem is –Youth initiated –Teaching-Parent initiated When a problem requires specific decision making
Ways to enhance positive counseling interactions Physical Setting Family Teacher or Treatment Parent –Listening skills –Verbal skills –Empathy –Consistency –Confidentiality –Other counseling considerations Pre-teaching for counseling sessions –Use of point card –Swearing –Social behavior
Time Breakdown 65% Teaching 25% Talking 10% Counseling
Counseling Checklist Situation: Family Teachers: Evaluator: YesNoRational Components Close physical proximity? Body Oriented toward youth? Good eye contact? Calm voice tone?
YesNoRational Components No interruptions? Verbal feedback? Non-verbal feedback? Reflective statements? Empathy Statements? Concern Statements? Help youth specify problem by asking specific questions?
YesNoRational Components Discuss options and alternatives with youths? Discuss consequences of options? Let youth make final decision with guidance from family teacher? Offer role-playing if appropriate? Express support for youth? Express interest for tomorrow?
Loss & Grief I.Kinds of Loss –Minor Pen, pencil, pocket change, time, place in book, poise, grace, teacher, boss, friend, hair, slimness, neighbors, home (through moving), children, hearing, eyesight, health, job (termination, retirement). –Major Family member (through divorce, death) Note: How we handle minor losses usually determines how we handle major losses.
II.Child's Losses From Placement –Parents, siblings, friends, school teachers, neighbors, relatives, room, possessions, cultural foods, known worth, shops, playground, etc. church. III.Stages of Grieving –Shock --denial--panic: This can't be happening. –Physical distress -- insomnia, fatigue, ulcers, headaches. –Anger -- resentments: Why me? –Depression -- loneliness: I don't/can't have what I want and haven't found a replacement.
–Inability to take part in usual activities. –Preoccupation with and idealization of lost object (or person), bargaining to get it/him/her back. –Guilt -- I should have known/been/done better. Very common in loss by death, especially suicide.
IVResolution of Grief –Identify the loss and what it means to you. –Express feelings -- talk with others. –Face facts -- what is lost is lost. –Renounce what was lost: Not judgment or condemnation, but recognition that lost object/person is no longer part of your life. –Actively, rather than passively, letting go. –Re-define and re-invest self in terms that don't include lost object/person.
Problem-Solving with SODAS SODAS stands for a five step problem solving approach It can be used to help think through most issues and problems It helps develop a solution so that youth are focused on solving problems rather than dwelling on them
What is a SODAS A planned problem solving technique that can be used independently or with your help to enable youth to make good choices. S= define the problem situation. O= specify options to deal with the problem situation. D= determine the disadvantages of each option. A= determine the advantages of each option. S= decide on a solution and role-play.
Situation Define situation by asking specific questions. Ask focused explorative questions in a non-threatening manner. Use empathy often to break up the questioning and establish a comfortable, communicative atmosphere. Caution= be careful not to assume you know what the problem situation is. You will damage the relationship and not clearly define the situation.
Options Help the youth look at a variety of options/ alternatives to deal with the problem situation. Sometimes youth can only think of are aggression or escape. (e.g. “I’ll deck him if he does that again,” or I’m never going to class again.”) These are unacceptable options, but rather than dismissing them, help the youth evaluate the natural and logical consequences of these options.
Options Continued By taking the time to do this with the youth, you are teaching them to evaluate the pros and cons and make an informed decision. You may suggest alternative options only after the youth has exhausted their own options. Remember! We are teaching them to solve their own problems. Youth need to list at least three options. Youth are often black and white thinkers who see things as “yes or no” so listing three options helps them look at the whole picture.
Disadvantages/Advantages For each option it is vital to help the youth come up with several disadvantages and advantages. By doing this you are teaching youth the skill that helps them make a connection between his behavior and what happens to him in his environment. Youth need to list at least three disadvantages and three advantages for each option. Youth are often black and white thinkers who see things as “yes or no” so listing three things helps them look at the whole picture.
Solution Once all options have been evaluated, the youth will pick the best solution available. Finally, you will role-play the solution in a “true-to-life” situation, using all the skills that might apply in the situation. This should include a demonstration, practice and possibly multiple cued practices.
Final Thoughts By providing a variety of practice situations, the Family Teacher is ensuring that the youth will know when and where to appropriately use the skills.