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This PowerPoint is ©2014 by Robin L. Simmons. All Rights Reserved. Robin L. Simmons Robin L. Simmons This PowerPoint is ©2014 by Robin L. Simmons. All.

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Presentation on theme: "This PowerPoint is ©2014 by Robin L. Simmons. All Rights Reserved. Robin L. Simmons Robin L. Simmons This PowerPoint is ©2014 by Robin L. Simmons. All."— Presentation transcript:

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2 This PowerPoint is ©2014 by Robin L. Simmons. All Rights Reserved. Robin L. Simmons Robin L. Simmons This PowerPoint is ©2014 by Robin L. Simmons. All Rights Reserved. Robin L. Simmons Robin L. Simmons

3 Cutting Words, Weeding Errors, & Planting Ideas for Maximum Effect Cutting Words, Weeding Errors, & Planting Ideas for Maximum Effect

4 So you must learn to trim “overgrown” phrasing from your essays. So you must learn to trim “overgrown” phrasing from your essays. Workplace writing won’t have word count requirements. Your boss will frown on unnecessary padding.

5 Cut unnecessary words.  In this day and age in which we live  Today  In order to succeed  To succeed  I began to panic  I panicked  Sylvia started to giggle  Sylvia giggled  James proceeded to eat  James ate

6 Rake up needless rubbish.  A multitude of  many  A plethora of  many  An immense number of  many  A great deal of  many  many  A myriad of  many  Countless examples of  many Never use more than one word when a single word will do! Never use more than one word when a single word will do!

7 Rubbish words keep you from getting to the point. We were unable to complete your request due to the fact that we are lazy and disorganized. We were unable to complete your request because we are lazy and disorganized. We were unable to complete your request since we are lazy and disorganized.

8 Clip weak verb-adverb pairs  I walked slowly through the mall.  I strolled through the mall.  Brenda ate the slice of cake quickly.  Brenda devoured the slice of cake.  Mark read his notes carefully.  Mark studied his notes.

9 Prune description that reads like a driver’s license or police report.  The oval-shaped, brown, six-legged cockroach  The cockroach  My 6-foot 3-inch, 225- pound older brother with 24-inch biceps slammed down his fist  My tall, well built brother slammed down his fist.

10 In order to receive a good grade in these modern educational times, I will begin to start to proceed to edit my essay carefully. In order to receive a good grade in these modern educational times, I will begin to start to proceed to edit my essay carefully. To receive a good grade today, I will revise my essay. 

11 Dig out pretentious language. We sat on the beach and enjoyed the pulchritude of the sunset. That has got to go! That has got to go! We sat on the beach and enjoyed the beauty of the sunset. Use a thesaurus with care! Use a thesaurus with care!

12 Eradicate the weeds of writing.  Carefully hoe the rows of your paragraphs, removing any sentence errors.  The best method: Cover your essay with a sheet of paper, and scan line by line.  Read the essay aloud to catch phrasing that doesn’t sound right.  For your diagnostic essay, remove unnecessary second-person pronouns: you, your, yours, etc.

13 Visit the Writing Center for help. Building 5, Room 155, West Campus ! Building 5,5, Room 155, West Campus ! Call – – to schedule an appointment. Call – – to schedule an appointment.

14 Plant details with care.  Your job is to transfer the pictures in your head into the heads of your readers.  Use specific names for people, places, things. The studentThe student  grill cook at Burger King, where I slave at least 25 hours per week  grill cook at Burger King, where I slave at least 25 hours per week My jobMy job My carMy car  my beat-up Civic with a muffler that drags on the ground  my beat-up Civic with a muffler that drags on the ground  Fred, my lab partner, who picks his nose  Fred, my lab partner, who picks his nose

15 Compare these two sentences:  The  The woman got angry with the man. AngryAngry Alice decided to run over her husband George with the Cadillac because, for the forty years of their marriage, he had refused to put the cap back on the toothpaste.

16 Avoid a mess like this in your essay … Avoid a mess like this in your essay …

17 … to create well organized beauty instead. … to create well organized beauty instead.

18 Avoid dry, dusty generalizations … Avoid dry, dusty generalizations …

19 And plant vibrant details to color your writing. And plant vibrant details to color your writing.

20 “Landscape” your draft.  Use a pen of a different color to mark at least 7 places in your essay that require revision: Cut 5 unnecessary words or phrases.Cut 5 unnecessary words or phrases. Plant 2 new sentences that will flower in your reader’s mind.Plant 2 new sentences that will flower in your reader’s mind.  Next, weed out all sentence errors.  Bring the edited draft to me for your prewriting points.  Compose the final draft of your essay, obeying all format requirements on the syllabus.  Be sure to print a hardcopy and upload an e-copy to SafeAssign.

21 The End. The End.


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