1. Today all students will:  Discuss the different types of bystanders and the roles they play in bullying situations  Discuss examples of how you can demonstrate a greater concern for bullied students  Describe memories you are creating in the minds of your peers  List the kind words you hope their peers will use after graduation to describe how they treated others in high school  Describe how it feels to be betrayed by peers when they are bullied  Describe how it feels to betray those who are bullied  Discuss the pain of regret and how regret can be avoided relative to bullying. Bully Free Sophomore Class Session 5

2. Lesson 26: Types of Bystanders (handout)  Which One Describes Me?  -Bully’s Helper  -Bully’s Encourager  -Ignorer  -Victim’s Helper

3. Bullying involves everyone  There is a student who bullies and the bullied student. Everyone else is a bystander and makes a choice regarding the role they will play when someone is bullied. The handout I have given you describes the different types of bystanders and the typical role they play.  (Handout) Be honest when completing this worksheet. Indicate which role you typically play in a bullying situation by checking in the “yes” column or “no” column.

4. Journal Entry #10 Describe the role you are personally playing as a bystander. Explain why you play that role.

5. Lesson 27: Bystanders Part 1 – Compassion and Concern for Others)  What does the word “Maturity” mean to you?  What behaviors indicate that a person is mature?  “Maturity begins when you can sense your concern for others outweighing your concern for yourself.”

6.  Can you think of examples in history when people demonstrated a greater compassion and concern for mistreated individuals than themselves? If so, please share what they did to demonstrate their compassion and concern.  Can you think of examples when someone you know demonstrated greater compassion and concern for bullied individuals than for themselves? If so, please share what they did to demonstrate their compassion and concern.

7. Compassion  How would you define compassion?  “Compassion is feeling for another’s need and helping that person without expecting anything in return.”

8. Quotes  In groups, discuss how your quotes relate to how we treat others and our willingness to help those bullied?  Paraphrase (Reword) your assigned quote  Share your responses with the class

9. Journal Entry #12  Reflect on the class discussion of the quotes and to describe the level of compassions and caring they have for students’ who are bullied.

10. Lesson 28: Creating Positive Memories  It is important for us to understand that every day we have an opportunity to create a negative or positive life-long memory in the minds of others.  Please understand that bullying is very powerful and often remembered for a lifetime. Bullying leaves scars on the minds of people.

11.  Kindness is also very powerful and remembered for a lifetime.  We should care about what our peers will remember about us. Our reputation will follow us into and through the adult years.

12. Memories about Me (handout) -read and follow the instructions to complete the “Memories about Me” handout.  “Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless” -Mother Theresa of Calcutta Let’s challenge ourselves to use kind words with others to create kind memories about us.

13. Lesson 29: Betrayed  What does the word betray mean?  “To have people you trust let you down by not supporting you or defending you. For example, they allow you to be delivered into the hands of your abusers or the bullies. They are not loyal or faithful to you. They violate your trust in them. They may mistreat you or join in on the bullying, laugh or just ignore what is happening to you.”

14. Have you ever felt like you have been betrayed by others?  How did you feel? -Lonely? -Sad? -Angry? -Humiliated? -Rejected? -Confused? -Disappointed?

15. What are some do’s and don’ts for coping with betrayal? Don’t…  Scream at them  Get even or retaliate  Cry and beg them to help you  Go out of your way to show them kindness

16. Do…  Avoid letting them know they have hurt you. Try not to let them see you upset.  Make it clear that you feel they have betrayed you and that you can’t have friends you can’t trust.  Tell them you value their friendship, but if they betray you in the future, then you will have to find other friends you can trust.  Assume everything you say behind the person’s back (anyone’s back) will get back to them.  Be careful what you put in writing about people because they can get into the hands of people who want to hurt and embarrass you.  Ask for an apology. You deserve it.

17. Journal Entry #13  Reflect on the lesson and write a paragraph regarding your thoughts and feelings.

18. Lesson 30: Regret and Bullying Prevention  How would you define regret? Regret is a feeling of sorrow or remorse for a fault, act, loss, disappointment, etc.

19. Tim McGraw – One of These Days We used to chase that boy home from school We called him freckle faced red headed fool He was different, he wasn't cool like me Sticks and stones didn't break any bones But we never left well enough alone One day he ran away from home you see And I passed him as he walked away And in his eyes I heard him say One of these days you're gonna love me You'll sit down by yourself and think 'Bout all the times you pushed and shoved me And what good friends we might have been And then you're gonna sigh a little And maybe even cry a little But one of these days you're gonna love me Patty Sue was a small town beauty I took one look at her and had to pull her to me Lord knows she should have seen right through me When I promised her the world But at 17 you only want one thing I left her standing with my high school ring Innocent tears in a pourin' rain As I walked away And I still see her in my dreams And to this day she's whispering One of these days you're gonna love me You'll sit down by yourself and think About the time you turned from me And what good friends we might have been And then you're gonna sigh a little And maybe even cry a little But one of these days, you're gonna love me Now everybody stands up The congregation sings It's a song of sweet forgiveness And as the chorus rings The wind blows clear my memory The pages start to turn And suddenly I'm singing The moment that I learn One of these days I'm gonna love me And feel the joy of sweet release One of these days I'll rise above me And at last I'll find some peace And then I'm gonna smile a little And maybe even laugh a little But one of these days... I'm gonna love me

20. Kelly Rowland - Stole He was always such a nice boy The quiet one With good intentions He was down for his brother Respectful to his mother A good boy But good don't get attention One kid with a promise The brightest kid in school He's not a fool Reading books about science and smart stuff It's not enough, no Cause smart don't make you cool, whoa He's not invisible anymore With his Father's 9 and a broken fuse Since he walked through that Classroom door He's all over primetime news Mary's got the same size hands As Marilyn Monroe She put her fingers in the imprints at Mann's Chinese Theatre show She could've been a movie star Never got the chance to go that far Her life was stole Now we'll never know No no no no oh They were crying to the camera Said he never fitted in He wasn't welcomed He showed up to the parties He was hanging in Some guys was puttin' him down Bullyin him round round Now I wish I would've talked to him Gave him the time of day not turn away If I woulda been the one to maybe go this far He might have stayed at home Playing angry chords on his guitar He's not invisible anymore With his baggy pants and his legs in chains Since he walked through that classroom door Everybody knows his name Mary's got the same size hands (Oh) As Marilyn Monroe She put her fingers in the imprints (Ooh) at Mann's Chinese Theatre show She coulda been a movie star (She coulda been a movie star, oh) Never got the chance to go that far Her life was stole, ohh Now we'll never know (Now we'll never know, oh) Greg was always getting net from 20 feet away (20 feet away) He had a try out with the Sixers Couldn't wait for Saturday (Saturday) Now we're never gonna see him slam Flying high as Kobe can His life was stole (Stole) Oh now we'll never know Now we'll never never never know Mmm now we'll never never never never know Stole (Stole) Oh whoa yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah Mary's got the same size hands (Same size hands) As Marilyn Monroe (Oh) She put her fingers in the imprints At Mann's Chinese Theatre show (She was gonna be a star) She coulda been a movie star (Oh no) Never got the chance to go that far (Never got the chance) Her life was stole (Stole, stole) Oh now we'll never know (Now we'll never never know, no) Greg was always getting net from 20 feet away (He had game, oh) He had a try out with the Sixers Couldn't wait for Saturday Now we're never gonna see him slam (Never see him) Flying high as Kobe can His life was stole (Stole, oh) Oh now we'll never know (Now we'll never never know) Oh no no no Yeah their lives were stole now we'll never know Stole Stole Stole We were here all together yesterday Stole stole stole

21. Quotes (handout)  Discuss the quotes as a group Journal Entry #14:  What are some of the things you’ve done that you regret because it hurt someone?  What are some of the things you regret not doing that would have made someone happier?