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HR ‘79 2009 Report What’s more interesting than us? 1.

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Presentation on theme: "HR ‘79 2009 Report What’s more interesting than us? 1."— Presentation transcript:

1 HR ‘79 2009 Report What’s more interesting than us? 1

2 – today’s presentation – Overall survey results 2

3 Our Agenda Harvard – Radcliffe MJR Marriage & family MJR Health, lifestyle, fertility JCS Careers, work & money JCS Sex JCS Spirituality MJR Politics JCS Happiness MJR Open ended ?s JCS Changes across the years MJR 3

4 Overview - 150 responses 61% Male 89 % Caucasian, 3% Hispanic, 3% African American, 5% Asian 40% Urban, 51% suburban, 6% small town, 3% rural 93% heterosexual 28% Protestant, 16% Jewish, 17% Catholic, 30% atheist or agnostic 4

5 Starting at the beginning – Harvard? 52% encountered most stimulating people at HR – 58% for women – 48% for men For 19% of us, closest friends are HR folks 65% look back w/ pride, 78% w/ fondness, 50% w/ gratitude, 17% regret, 3% anger 5

6 Impact on career and “personal satisfaction” Career: – HR significant impact on career for 57% – HR “afforded me opportunities I never dreamed of” for 10% Personal Satisfaction: – Significant effect for 57% – Life changing for 24% 6

7 HR Today...better or worse than 30 years ago? 17% no clue 18% worse and much worse 9% much better 56% somewhat better 3 X as many women think much worse, and 2X as many men think much better (small #s) 7

8 Marriage, Family – 8% of Men, 9% of Women, Never Married – 75% both men and women married 1X – 11% women, 15% men married 2X – 6% women, 1% men married 3X – Of the currently unmarried, 75% of women and 37% of men would rather be married – 85% With Kids – 95% Of The Married Have Kids 8

9 Inbreeding 33% of women and 12% of men are married to a classmate 76% of classmate marriages described as great or very good compared to 80% of non- classmate 8% divorce rate for classmates vs. 24% for non 9

10 If not married, which of the following best describes why you are not married? 10

11 My marriage or committed partnership is: 11

12 Have you ever been unfaithful to your partner? 12

13 Have you ever attended counseling to attempt to salvage or improve a marriage or relationship? 13

14 How old is your spouse? (3% have had a spouse die) 14

15 What is your partner's highest level of education? 15

16 How many children do you have? 16

17 How old were you when you had your first child? 17

18 Children have changed my life: 18

19 Who spends more time caring for the children? 19

20 How have children affected your relationship with your partner? 20

21 My children are(check all that apply): 21

22 My children's high school was/will be: 22

23 Do you have children in college? 23

24 Putting aside your own kid (if any) I believe the current younger generation ( mid- to late teens) is... 24

25 Again, leaving your own kids out, I believe this younger generation is: 25

26 Health, Fertility, Lifestyle 26

27 Have you or a partner undergone treatment to enhance fertility or bring a pregnancy to term? 27

28 How much alcohol do you consume weekly? (1 beer=1 glass of wine=1 mixed drink) 28

29 How many cigarettes do you smoke daily? 29

30 How many times a week do you use recreational drugs? 30

31 Have you ever been treated for substance abuse? 31

32 How many hours per week do you devote to exercise? 32

33 The level of stress in my life is: 33

34 Have you ever sought psychiatric or psychological counseling? 34

35 Have you taken prescription medication to treat depression and/or anxiety? 35

36 Have you had cosmetic surgery/treatments to (check all that apply) 36

37 Have you been diagnosed with any form of cancer? 37

38 Have you had any serious heart problems? 38

39 Conscientious? 76% of men have an annual prostate exam 84% of women have an annual mammogram 39

40 How many of your (birth) parents are still alive? 40

41 Are you responsible for or do you care for a parent? 41

42 How many hours per month do you spend on volunteer work? 42

43 Career, Work, Money – 85% Went On To Further Education – 77% work “outside” and 7% “inside” the home – 58% Work In Business/Medicine/Law – 2% retired – 39% 200K and > Individual Income – 65% 200K and > HH Inc. 43

44 What is your highest level of education? 44

45 If you work for money, how many hours per week do you devote to paid work? 45

46 Are you a founder or co-founder of the enterprise where you work? 46

47 Law, Business, Medicine = 57% 47

48 Business & Law most lucrative 48

49 How many jobs have you held since graduating from college? 49

50 How many times have you changed careers? 50

51 How frequently have you had to compromise your ethical standards in pursuing a career? 51

52 If you work for pay, how would you describe your feelings about your career? 52

53 47% of women stayed home w/ kids 53

54 Do you feel trapped in your career? 54

55 How satisfied are you with the balance you have struck between a paying career vs. family, friends community, self? 55

56 Have you ever been a victim of sexual harassment in the workplace? 56

57 Have you ever been the victim of racial discrimination in the workplace? 57

58 Have you ever been the victim of gender discrimination in the workplace? 58

59 What was the primary factor in your choice of work? 59

60 How often do you think that you might have chosen the wrong work? 60

61 Have you attained the level of success you anticipated you might enjoy 30 years out of college? 61

62 Are you fairly compensated for the work you do? 62

63 All right, what is your annual personal earned income? 63

64 And your annual household earned income? 64

65 And after we’re gone... 76% have a will 58% believe in the possibility of a significant inheritance for their children 65% not concerned about the prospect of leaving significant wealth to children, 35% are concerned 65

66 Income by Hours worked / week 66

67 Income by success attribution 67

68 Income by tenure w/ current employer 68

69 Income by primary motivation for career choice 69

70 Income by satisfaction level 70

71 Income by feelings about career 71

72 Income by “feeling trapped” 72

73 Income by satisfaction w/ balance career / family / friends / community / self 73

74 Income by level success 74

75 Income by feelings about compensation 75

76 If you won the lottery (and had zero financial concerns) 76

77 And those dream jobs are... talk-show host photography, writing, teaching writer teach practicing psychiatry in Australia's outback Teaching Writing Political additional real estate development Dreaming volunteering overseas working farm in upstate NY helping disadvantaged people teaching Writing writer school system superintendent executive director of a non profit charity being a life coach helping find solutions to global climate change writing photography setting up a film and television production co. Teaching or Acting reinventing public schools Writing and volunteering with kids Perform medical research full time. music and medicine, writing healthcare/public health in third world producing films writing books build more sentient underwater robots Boat captain Writing I'd go back to Law School, get my degree. Write fiction Writing poetry & composing music teaching politics / screen writing 77

78 SEX 78

79 How many times per month, on average, do you have sex? 79

80 Lately, my sex life is: 80

81 As I get older, my need for sex is: 81

82 With how many people have you had sexual intercourse? 82

83 Do you or your partner use Viagra or a similar treatment? 83

84 How old is your spouse? 84

85 Have you ever been laid off or fired? 85

86 Which of the following best describes your current marital status? 86

87 Lately, my sex life is: 87

88 I live: 88

89 Sex frequency by Spiritual Affiliation 89

90 If you work for money, how many hours per week do you devote to paid work? 90

91 The level of stress in my life is: 91

92 How much alcohol do you consume weekly? (1 beer=1 glass of wine=1 mixed drink) 92

93 I am a registered: 93

94 Spirituality 94

95 Over the last 5 years, the importance of spirituality to me has: 95

96 Over the past 5 years, the importance of organized religion to me has: 96

97 Do you believe in God or a "higher power"? 97

98 How often do you attend religious services? 98

99 My child/ren is/are being or will be imbued with: 99

100 Politics 100

101 I consider myself: 101

102 For whom did you vote in the 2008 Presidential election? 102

103 How would you rate Bush's presidency? 103

104 How would you rate Obama's presidency (so far)? 104

105 Have you changed your party affiliation since 1979? 105

106 Do you believe the country is better off now than it was five years ago? 106

107 Do you work for social change? 107

108 Are you politically active in your community? 108

109 I am a registered: 109

110 All right, what is your annual personal earned income? 110

111 The biggest threat to the security of the U.S. is: 111

112 Other... Out of control government spending growing national debt reliance on oil for energy Our own arrogance. lack of understanding other cultures/systems unbridled illegal immigration lack of proper education Lack of good education American affluence broken political model, can't address challenges oil instability Narcissistic "it's all about me" attitude in U.S. pervasive & persuasive antagonism and ignorance government fiscal policy A Congress & White House w/ o real-world experience Lack of education both within the U.S. and without Mediocre educational systems & resulting extremism all of the above naive and self serving policies in government Misguided liberal economic policies increasing inequity of resources and opportunities Islamic fundamentalism Budget deficit economic!!!! global warming social, economic & environmental unsustainability 112

113 Are term limits for elected officials a good idea? 113

114 I am: 114

115 The recent economic crisis has: 115

116 For the economic crisis, I most blame: 116

117 Other... not regulating what should be & over-regulating rest congress those who want much for little ($, effort, time) The Democrats who required subprime loans human nature government agencies, politicians, financial instit George Bush and his administration the Bush admin's failure to enforce finan regs Greenspan and repeal of Glass-Steagall All of the Above and Myself. 117

118 My political opinions are primarily shaped by: 118

119 All right, what is your annual personal earned income? 119

120 Have you ever sought psychiatric or psychological counseling? 120

121 How would you rate Bush's presidency? 121

122 How would you rate Obama's presidency (so far)? 122

123 Have you changed your party affiliation since 1979? 123

124 Are you politically active in your community? 124

125 For the economic crisis, I most blame: 125

126 Do you or your partner use Viagra or a similar treatment? 126

127 Is your standard of living better or worse than that of your parents at the same age? 127

128 How often do you attend religious services? 128

129 Do you believe in God or a "higher power"? 129

130 So, how happy are we? 130

131 How would you describe your spiritual affiliation? 131

132 What is your highest level of education? 132

133 Which of the following best describes the location of your primary residence? 133

134 My current primary work is: 134

135 What was the primary factor in your choice of work? 135

136 Have you attained the level of success you anticipated you might enjoy 30 years out of college? 136

137 All right, what is your annual personal earned income? 137

138 Do you feel you are making an important contribution to society? 138

139 The level of stress in my life is: 139

140 How much alcohol do you consume weekly? (1 beer=1 glass of wine=1 mixed drink) 140

141 I am a registered: 141

142 Which of the following best describes your current marital status? 142

143 My marriage or committed partnership is: 143

144 Lately, my sex life is: 144

145 I live: 145

146 The happiest person in the class is Male, Buddhist, doctor, living in a small town, chose his career for flexibility, had low expectations when he graduated, making $400K / year, low stress, 7-10 drinks a week, republican, living w/ non-married partner, in a great relationship w/ a great sex life, and no kids around 146

147 The biggest surprise of the last 30 years is... 147

148 The personal... "that so many things slipped away because I was too busy to be there! How unprepared I was for the everyday challenges of life - raising children, How, inside, I'm still the same...and then I look in the mirror.. that I could successfully break away from my parents' expectations and follow my own values and proclivities professionally. Getting sober in AA changed my life for the better. 148

149 Continued... I never married. How wonderful my kids are and how much I love being with them. I am not in jail How much I enjoyed being a father finding the love of my life after too many years apart how little I got done! 149

150 The philosophical How the world is simultaneously magnificent, glorious and utterly fallen and corrupt how much I learn each day; there are very few days when I am not broadened in some way by the world around me. how fast they sped by how quickly time went by 150

151 The political Fall of Soviet Union/Russia and the rise of China. President Obama's election that the american people sadly elected George Bush George Bush was elected President for 2nd time America finally elected an African American President. 151

152 The parochial the Red Sox finally winning the World Series Red Sox winning the World Series Red Sox winning the World Series (twice!) 152

153 The biggest disappointment of the last 30 years is... 153

154 The personal I never married. Getting divorced. going through two divorces never married, no family Sadness is a better word. Discovering that my children have behavioral, emotional and learning issues that I can ameliorate but not fix. That I'm not so head-over-heels in love that I'd want to get married again. The death of my parents before our children were born. 154

155 Continued... not being more famous not having accomplished more in my career what a consuming career really cost me in time and family without giving me more freedom and financial security; the discovery that nice guys might really finish last. how quickly it passed by while I focused only on work -- I missed the ride the death of my wife That I've had repeated health problems. 155

156 The philosophical How much official morality and values are flimsy veneers for the coarsest, self-serving, selfish purposes Observing the moral breakdown of our society and being stuck in one of the epicenters - Massachusetts. The failure of our generation to have a positive impact on the major problems facing the world 156

157 The political The mistakes, especially on the war, economy and climate change, made by the country over the past 8 years. The rise of the religious right The rise of religious, ethnic and political extremism everywhere. The strong anti-tax, me-first, anti-choice political voice in this country, exemplified by George W. Bush. I didn't know we could all be so selfish and short- sighted. 157

158 The Profound the last episode of Seinfeld finding out that some people never grow up past the middle school phase, like one of my freshman roommates 158

159 What one thing do you wish you had known in 1979? 159

160 Self-Knowledge Be brave. Be bold. You really can do whatever you want. Think big. Take advantage of youth to take risks and don't fear failure It's important to be ambitious - not just to be talented! Talent won't open the doors, but may keep them open. What you fear is often what you should choose, and where you should go. 160

161 Continued... I should have been more confident about my intellect, appearance, and potential to accomplish more. My potential to contribute to society. I somehow expected less of myself than I found I was capable of giving. I wish I had had higher expectations. Maturity is so much more fun than it looks, and worth the effort to acquire. Middle age is a joy. We will always look at the young and remember ourselves; they will not look at us and see their future. 161

162 Some practical advice would have been nice... Babies and dogs are babe magnets Put more money away for retirement Buy Microsoft. Buy and keep New York City real estate the importance of playing the field more with the opposite sex to get more perspective. 162

163 Life lessons how precious every moment is... that the time passes more quickly than you realize Take life less seriously Don't sweat the small stuff. 163

164 Finally, words to live by Stretching before and after exercise is really important to being able to continue to exercise comfortably. 164

165 The single most important choice/ event / circumstance that determined the course of your personal life - for good or ill... 165

166 Continued... following up on meeting my wife at work Meeting my current partner. choice of spouse Getting married to my Harvard classmate/boyfriend Making the decision to live with my life partner, even though we were in a law firm where that was frowned upon. Meeting and marrying my wife (despite her having been engaged to someone else when I met her) 166

167 Continued... My choice of spouse My marriage. Meeting the man I hoped to marry when I was at college - and being unable to imagine life without him. Meeting my wife on a warm summer night. marrying my high school sweetheart falling for my husband's turquoise eyes! FOR GOOD: the sweet Harvard boy that I married 167

168 Advice for those contemplating retirement Simplify your life. Focus on what is truly meaningful to you. Follow your bliss. Don’t spend it idly-enjoy life, savor the moments with family and friends and give something back to society give yourself freedom to see if you enjoy it; if not, reenter workforce "I am semi-retired and it took a long time to get used to a slower pace, less pay and lower status. But I think I have finally rounded the bend and found satisfaction in contributing to life on many different levels and then watching how the ripples emanate outwards. 168

169 Continued... I am no longer in need of the status or the money to determine my sense of self worth and that is a big change for the better and provides a feeling of freedom." Enjoy the free time instead of feeling like one should always be busy doing something productive. Don't feel guilty about liking it (as I sometimes do). Enjoy each moment fully. Keep doing things for OTHERS. Leave USA 169

170 Finally, anything else you’d like to share? For all its horrors, this world and this life remains an infinitely breathtaking, awesome, blessed source of joy, majesty, delight, comedy, wonder and love. What have I learned? Appreciate and make the most of today. The past is gone and cannot be changed. The future is not here yet and can be shaped. 170

171 Continued Everything that worked for me for 45 years has now started to work against me and so I am rewiring myself to cultivate patience, grace, non- judgementalism, resiliency and a less competitive way of living, because I think that is the only way to embrace aging so as not to become old and bitter. 171

172 And thoughts on Harvard... Harvard has been a label I've carried with me my entire life...sometimes good, sometimes bad but nearly always to my advantage Harvard is broke and needs your help Thank you, Harvard. I am more thankful than ever today. If I were selecting a college, I would choose Harvard again. 172

173 Continued... My Harvard roommates have been a never-ending source of support. God bless the person who matched us up. I miss Harvard. It's been a good 30 years. Our kids are doing very well -- they're both undergraduates at Harvard. It's hard to keep loving Harvard when my own child - far more qualified than I was -was denied admittance. I wish I could compartmentalize my own college experience apart from my hopes for my children, but I find I cannot 173

174 Continued... As a parent, I continue to be surprised at how much better some other liberal arts colleges conduct their undergraduate education, e.g. small classes, faculty contact, academic counseling. I think the best thing about Harvard were the dorms, but I can't say that my education was first rate. My daughter at Brown is having a better academic experience (although, to use the vernacular, their dorms "suck"). 174

175 Major Changes over past 15 years Urban dwelling down from 47 to 40%, suburban up from 41 to 51% “serene and content” w/ the balance we’ve struck, up from 59 to 71% How we explain our success – Intelligence down from 47 to 29% – Getting along w/ people up from 12 to 25% 175

176 Continued... Making an important contribution to society..up from 70% to 82% Career as first priority down from 30% to 15% 78% of us still think time to switch careers – down from 84% 23% who describe stress as high down to 13% Those who drink 7 or more per week up from 19 to 29 11% care for a parent, up from 5% 176

177 How do we see the world Biggest threats – 15 years ago: domestic poverty (35%) and diminishing international competitiveness – 10 years ago: domestic poverty (26%) and regional conflict – Now: Financial crisis (26%)...domestic poverty down to 5% 177

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