Presentation on theme: "1 读写任务作文点评 六中 钟慧鸣. 2 THE WOLF IS COMING （狼来了） 3 Can you tell us the story? What can you learn from the story? (Who/what/the result)"— Presentation transcript:
1 读写任务作文点评 六中 钟慧鸣
2 THE WOLF IS COMING （狼来了）
3 Can you tell us the story? What can you learn from the story? (Who/what/the result)
4 1) 以约 30 词概括这篇演讲稿的要点； 2) 以约 120 词写一篇读后感， 说明 “ 诚信的重要性 ” ， 内容包括： a) 你读后的感受； b) 以你或他人的经历说明； c) 谈谈你从中悟出的道理。 Writing tasks 写作内容 2011 广州一模
5 title ( or omit 省略 ) summary (about 30 words) body (about 120 words ） structure How to Write Task Writing An outline( 提纲）
6 Glance through the text, and find out the style of the text. And try to find out the main points. Part one: How to write a summary ： After finding all the main points, use the conjunctions to write your own summary.
7 Can you grasp the main idea ? Good morning, ladies and gentlemen. This is Li Hua from Senior Three. I’m here today to share with you a good lesson from an overseas Chinese student living in Germany. It is a true story. After years of hard word, this Chinese student graduated with amazing academic achievements. Everyone thought he was going to get a good job easily and have a bright future. But to his disappointment, he was not even allowed the chance for an interview! The third time he was turned down, he couldn’t help telephoning the company to ask why they didn’t want him. The answer was simple, “We don’t hire dishonest people in Germany.” What was wrong you might wonder? The truth is, shortly after he arrived in Germany, this clever student found that is was easy to skip buying subway tickets. So, to save money, he often went without a ticket. As a result, he had been caught without a ticket in the subway three times. From this story, we learn that we may get short-term benefits by dishonest means, but the truth will come out sooner or later and the cost is high. So remember: honesty is the best policy. That’s all for my speech. Thank you. narration what we learn
8 This speech tells us a true story that a student was dishonest in Germany. So he couldn’t find a job though he had an amazing academic achievements. 许光琼 Please evaluate your classmates’ writings (summary) In the speech, the author Li Hua tells us that an overseas Chinese student, who went to get a good job after graduation in Germany, but failed. The reason was that he didn’t buy a ticket in the subway for there times, So we know that the honesty is important in our life. 黄国丽 2’ 4’ lack of points too long, 30words
9 The passage is mainly about an oversea Chinese student who is outstanding was rejected by many companies because he didn’t buy tickets when taking the subway. We should take honesty seriously. 冯淑清 4’-5’ Good: use the conjunctions to write the summary in own words write in third person Please evaluate your classmates’ writings (summary)
10 1.The author tells us__________ through his experience/by doing sth. 2.The passage is mainly about _________,which shows us______. Rewrite your summary and polish it Useful patterns:
11 In his speech Li Hua spoke of an overseas Chinese student who couldn’t find a job because of his dishonesty. The story shows us that honesty really is the best policy.
12 your feelings use your or other’s experience 5-6experience (who? what happen? why? what’s the result?) what you can learn from the text 2-3 Step 1: Analyze the structure of your composition past tense present & future tense honesty/dishonesty Part two :Body of the composition Body divide the passages according the questions +supporting sentences1-2
13 Step2: evaluate your classmates’ writings (feelings) From the story, I realize that the honesty is so important that it can influence your life. It reminds me of something happened to my friend. When we were in middle school…. 陈丹 After reading this passage, I deeply realized that the honesty is so important in our social life. I felt sorry for the boy, and he really gave us a good lesson. I can well remember there was a time that a neibouhood of mine got good grades when he was at the university... 许光琼 better your feelings +supporting sentences1-2
14 Step3: evaluate your peers’ writings (experiences) In my class, there is a classmate, Liu Tao, who often borrows money from us and never returns one time, although he said that I must return you tomorrow. Is he very poor? No, he always escaped from class after borrow money from class, and go to play computer games. Now, all classmates know his bad behavior and but unwilling to borrow money to him. What’s worse, some classmate would ignore him and don’t talk to him, especially his best friends because they are so disappointed that they can’t speak anything. too long just set down a series of fact…
15 Having read the story, I feel sorry about the student and also be shamed of his dishonest behavior. The story reminds me of an experience of me. When I was eight, I had a good friend called Tom, who always played with me in my house. One day, Tom and I were playing football in the yard but carelessly I broke my father favorite car’s glasses. After he came back, he was really angry, seeing that. Due to the fear of blame, I told a lie that it was Tom that broke the glasses, I was got away from the blame however I lost my best friend, who had looked down upon me. Please evaluate your peers’ writings (experiences) being blamed 陈斯娜 Having read the story The story reminds me of an experience of me. When One day After Due to
16 Who? How to write your or other’s experience What happen? Why? What’s the result?
17 Step4: arrange on the whole. (use the conjunctions ) your feelings+supporting sentences use your or other’s experienceexperience (Who? what happened? why? What’s the result?) what you can learn from the text summary honesty/dishonesty The story reminds me of my experience of… After reading the speech,… From these stories, I really learned the lesson that… 过渡句
18 After reading this speech, I felt really sorry for the student who had ruined his own promising future just for some short-term benefits. On the other hand, I also thought it was correct to punish someone who had been dishonest. I once read another story about dishonesty. In that story the author found himself alone in his headmaster’s office, where he accidentally found the writing contest paper. He was going to take part in the competition and so couldn’t resist the temptation( 诱 惑 ) to read it. As he prepared well beforehand, he won the first prize in the contest. But instead of feeling happy and proud, he felt guilty. This feeling started the moment he decided to read the paper and it followed him all his life. From these stories, I really learned the lesson that honesty is the best policy. In life we are often tempted to be dishonest, but for a happy and guilt-free life we know what the best choice is. Possible version:
19 Conclusion 读写任务型写作模板 1. A title 标题 ( or omit 省略 ) 2. A summary 3. Transitional words to lead in ( 过渡句） --- story or argumentation ( 经历或说理论证） 4. Conclusion （结尾） 养 成良好的写作习惯 一、书写规范，卷面整洁； 二、审清题目，提炼要点； 三、组词造句，组句成篇； 四、仔细检查，认真修改。
20 Let’s Practise Writing 《 360° 高考二轮专题析与练》 P100 Facing the Trials of life 1 、 用 30 个左右的词概括短文内容。 2 、用 120 个词以 “ Facing the Trials of life” 为题 进行讨论，内容包括： ⑴、你阅读短文后的感受； ⑵、简述你经历过的一次困难或考验； ⑶、你认为应当如何看待生活中的考验。
21 Thanks for your listening!
22 句型必备句型必备： 1. I had an unforgettable experience…. From the experience I realize that…. 2. The story reminds me of my experience of… 3. I also had a similar experience, from which I learn that…. 4.One’s experience is a good example to prove that… Another similar experience of mine jumps into my mind.
23 说明事物的重要性或意义 1.…is of great importance/significance/value/help. 2.…plays an important/significant role in… For one thing… For another… 3.No…/Nothing is more important/impressive/unforgettable than… 4.Why is …so important? 5.It is essential that people… 6.…is/are an important part of …,which carry great importance….
24 The boy who cries wolfOnce there is a boy. He has many sheep. He looks after them every day. Nobody plays with him. He feels very lonely. He thinks his work is not interesting at all. He wants to have some fun. So he decides to play a trick with the people in the village. “Help! Help! Wolf! Wolf! I see a wolf, a big wolf.” The boy shouts loudly. The villagers hear the shouting. They go quickly with sticks and knives. When they arrive, they asks the boy. “Where is the wolf?” “Wolf? I don’t know where the wolf is. I am just kidding. Ha ha ha…” Says the boy. The villagers reply angrily, “You are so naughty. We are all busy. That is not funny at all.” All of the villagers go back to the village. The boy laughs. He thinks it is so fun that so many adults are cheated. He wants to have a rest and do that again. A few minutes later, the boy is crying for wolf again. Some villagers think the boy is fooling them again. But others think maybe this time the wolf is really coming. So all the villagers trust the boy once more. They asks the boy where the wolf is. The boy laughs once again. He laughs at the villagers, “Don’t be silly. There is no wolf here. There are some foolish men. Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!” The villagers are very angry. They promise not to help him next time if he doesn’t correct. The next day, a wolf comes. “Hello, my friend. How are you? I am glad to meet you. ” “Oh, my God…” The boy says scared. Then the boy shouts loudly and scared. “Wolf! Wolf! Help! Help! The wolf is eating my sheep.” But now no one will trust him any more. No one will come to help him. The wolf takes away all the boy’s sheep 从前，有个放羊娃，每天都去山上放羊。 一天，他觉得十分无聊，就想了个捉 弄大家寻开心的主意。他向着山下正在种田的农夫们大声喊： “ 狼来了！狼来了！救命 啊！ ” 农夫们听到喊声急忙拿着锄头和镰刀往山上跑，他们边跑边喊： “ 不要怕，孩子， 我们来帮你打恶狼！ ” 农夫们气喘吁吁地赶到山上一看，连狼的影子也没有！放羊娃哈 哈大笑： “ 真有意思，你们上当了！ ” 农夫们生气地走了。 第二天，放羊娃故伎重演， 善良的农夫们又冲上来帮他打狼，可还是没有见到狼的影子。 放羊娃笑得直不起腰： “ 哈哈！你们又上当了！哈哈！ ” 大伙儿对放羊娃一面再再而三地说谎十分生气，从此 再也不相信他的话了。 过了几天，狼真的来了，一下子闯进了羊群。放羊娃害怕极了， 拼命地向农夫们喊： “ 狼来了！狼来了！快救命呀！狼真的来了！ ” 农夫们听到他的喊 声，以为他又在说谎，大家都不理睬他，没有人去帮他，结果放羊娃的许多羊都被狼 咬死了。