Presentation on theme: "BIBLICAL COUNSELING Tok Corpus October 2008. IS COUNSELING BIBLICAL? An aging Paul to a young, shy, and reluctant Timothy. Barnabas to his inconsistent."— Presentation transcript:
IS COUNSELING BIBLICAL? An aging Paul to a young, shy, and reluctant Timothy. Barnabas to his inconsistent relative named John Mark. Mordacai to his young cousin Hadassah, aka Esther Queen of Persia and Media. Naomi to her widowed in-law Ruth. Moses to the young Joshua.
IS COUNSELING BIBLICAL? None of them were trained in psychotherapy nor possessed a degree in counseling. They were not trained theologians, but they were versed in Scripture and led by God in helping the flock to overcome difficulties and fulfill God’s loving purpose for them. Ministry servant-leaders are in similar positions today.
IS COUNSELING BIBLICAL? A leader consoles a sister who did not get asked to go dating. A leader discovers a teen disturbed and distracted by the parents marital problems. A leader prays silently beside the bed of a friend who just attempted suicide. A leader comforts a spouse who was physically abused by the husband. A leader chats with a disciple about her ministry SHAPE.
IS COUNSELING BIBLICAL? This is what you are signing up for – and even beyond…. Are you ready? (Motivation to pursue study) Amidst all the apprehension of ability and skill always remember that as disciples we are incidentally gifted…. Acts 2:38-39, 1John 2:20 our giftedness John 14:16,26, 15:26 and John 16:5-15 Counselor combines the ideas of comfort and counsel. As He does so we do…
CHARACTERISTICS OF BIBLICAL COUNSELING Several assumptions underlie Christian counselling… But the heart and soul of these assumptions are based on the principles and teachings of Scripture – God’s authoritative, infalliable Word, which is the ultimate source of healthy living. There are 7 characteristics we must first take and then we go to the practicals..
I. LOVE AND TRUTH LOVE (1JOHN 14:6) AND TRUTH (JOHN 14:6) God’s love motivates Him to reveal the truth to us. The major thesis of biblical counselling is that truth makes people free when they believe and obey it. John 8:31-32 The task of counselling is to replace misbeliefs with truths.
II. Right Size God Because of the Fall of Man, the malady of the soul – depression, guilt, shame, anger, addictions, etc., - are related to the underdevloped image of God within the soul. The soul is having difficulty recognizing God. The soul is having difficulty recognizing God. “Emotional wholeness lies in the working out of the image of God within us”. – Dr. Henry Cloud “Emotional wholeness lies in the working out of the image of God within us”. – Dr. Henry Cloud Though not all crises or problems are spiritual in their cause or in their correction, they are definitely connected in some form, shape, or influence to their spiritual convictions and spiritual wellness. Though not all crises or problems are spiritual in their cause or in their correction, they are definitely connected in some form, shape, or influence to their spiritual convictions and spiritual wellness.
III. Right Relationship With God A crucial and integrating factor in achieving healing and wholeness is a right standing and relationship with the living Christ. “Relationship with Christ provides resources that are utterly indespensible in substantially resolving every nonorganically caused psychological issues”. - Larry Crabb “Relationship with Christ provides resources that are utterly indespensible in substantially resolving every nonorganically caused psychological issues”. - Larry Crabb Wholeness cannot be achieved apart from Jesus Christ. Wholeness cannot be achieved apart from Jesus Christ.
IV. Right Relationship With Others Healthy relationships are the linchpins of mental, emotional, and spiritual health. Many of the crises faced by the disciples are inextricably related to relationships – with parents, siblings, children, relatives, friends, disciplers, disciples, leaders, and even with God. Loneliness, low self-esteem, peer pressure, rebellion, homosexuality, under acheivement, and other issues have their basis in unhealthy or broken relationships. Always, always look into relationships…
V. Healing is Possible Healing of the mind, emotions, and the spirit is possible. It will require a lot of work from the helper and the helpee – even in the helpee’s circle of family and friends. But more vital is the work of God through the HS. It may take a long time to do it, but God is willing and able. Be aware that the possibility is not self generated but inspired and spiritually supplied.
VI. Goal is to be like Christ The goal of biblical counselling is not happiness, but Christlikeness. “Many of us place top priority, not on becoming Christlike in the middle of the problems, but on finding happiness”. – Larry Crabb The paradoxical truth is this: One will never be happy if your primary concern is merely to be happy. The paradoxical truth is this: One will never be happy if your primary concern is merely to be happy. Our overriding goal as disciples must be in every circumstance – the good and the bad- to respond biblically.
VI. Goal is to be like Christ And biblical response is to put the Lord first and to seek to behave the way He desires me to. “The wonderful truth is this …. If we obediently abide in the truth in order to become more like Christ and thus make Him known, the by-product will by our eventual happiness – here and beyond..” The goal is not happiness but discipleship.
VII. Submission to the Will and Word of God Healing and wholeness will not come without sound biblical teaching and obedience to the Word and will of God. (AMS CR) We must always be ready to sound the alarm on those who try to substitue psychological techniques in place of bibilical teaching and understanding. As leaders, “we must do soul work on the realm of the deep things of the Bible and the Spirit and not be wading in the shallow waters of behavioral modification” – J. MacArthur.
VII. Submission to the Will and Word of God As disciples we have the tools for spiritual transformation. “Not to use spiritual tools for spiritual issues is like a surgeon wreaking havoc with a butter knife instead of using a scalpel.” – J. MacArthur “the most skilled counsellor is the one who most carefully, prayerfully, and faithfully applies the divine spiritual resources to the process of sanctification, shaping another in the image of Christ Jesus.”
VII. Submission to the Will and Word of God The leader who seeks to help people in crisis must make every effort to develop sound biblical tenets and techniques for such a ministry of comfort and communication. More important than techniques, however, will be a thorough and constant reliance upon the Holy Spirit of God.
“Methodology and technique, skill and the excersise of gifts are all constant work of the Spirit. What makes the difference is one’s attitude and inner motivation: does he do what he does in reliance upon his own efforts, in dependence upon methods and techniques, or does he acknowledge his own inability and ask the Spirit to use his gifts and methods? Gifts, methodology and technique, of course, maybe abused; they maybe set over against the Spirit and maybe used to replace His work. But they may also be used in complete subjection to Him and to the glory of God and the benefit of his children.” – Jay Adams
Counseling Practicals Pray before the appointment, at the start, in the middle, and the end. And pray some more later. Here is a tool to guide you to determine the root problem and address it effectively using the acrostic of L.E.A.D.E.R L-LISTEN E-EMPATHIZE A-AFFIRM D-DIRECT E-ENLIST R-REFER
Counseling Practicals L-LISTEN: Encourage them to talk freely. What is bothering you? How long has this been bothering you? When did it start? When do you feel most/least disturbed? Are there times when these feelings go away? Describe them. What are some ways you try to cope with it? How do you think you can or want to respond next time? Stay away from Qs using “why”. Stick with “What”, “When” and “How”.
Counseling Practicals E-EMPATHIZE: As the helpee shares, you must be able to communicate your empathy and interest. Leaning slightly forward in your chair. Nodding to indicate emotional companionship. Expressing desire to go deeper and understand. Reflecting key statements (“you feel..”, “your saying”.., “you responded”..etc.) Waiting patiently through pregnant silence. Allow tears to flow. Never stop tearful catharsis. Be careful “NOT” to say “I know how you feel”, or relate your similar past. Just assure that He is not alone with his feelings.
Counseling Practicals A-AFFIRM: Be alert and generous to offer “sincere/truthful” affirmation at every opportunity. Hurt people must be helped to see and acknowledge their strength, abilities, spiritual gifts, as well as their weaknesses. Helpee must be reminded that God values and love them. No sin is bigger than God. Any sin can be forgiven Everyone has abilities and gifts which can be developed. People have weaknesses which can be lived with and for which we can compensate.
Counseling Practicals D-DIRECT: Gently but firmly guide the helpee to talk through the causes and effects of the issue, and seek opportunity to sensitively steer him to appreciate his part and accept responsibility Ultimately, if issues have spiritual dimensions, then we are responsible to recover from our issues. If we do nothing, then nothing will happen. If we blame others entirely – we become bitter. If we blame ourselves entirely, we fall into shame. Point him back to fellowship with Christ & church. Focus him on prayer and worship. Pray harder…
Counseling Practicals E-ENLIST: Once the issue is revealed, enlist the helpee’s participation in developing a plan of action. Guide him to establish specific goals. Action plan should be small and manageable baby steps. Uncomplicated, measurable, reasonable and workable. Also involve the concentric circle of influence in His life. Spouse, family, siblings, children, BTs, Disciplers, disciples, etc. But must always have the last say on whom He wants to seek help from.
Counseling Practicals R-REFER: If the issue persists or worsens, particularly if his behaviour becomes erratic, self defeating and unmanageable refer him as soon as possible to professional biblical counseling. Talk to your Region leader for referal advice. You can call me for referal inputs 09178260746 Send them over to AMS Celebrate Recovery. Involve the helpee in your decision to refer. Show continuing care by being ready to support them during and after the referal procedure. Caution on refering to non-disciple counselors.
Close Out Counseling is biblical. As He does so we do… Counseling is biblical. As He does so we do… Characteristics of Biblical Counseling Characteristics of Biblical Counseling 1. Love and Truth 2. Right Size God 3. Right Relationship with God 4. Right Relationship with Others 5. Healing is Possible 6. Goal is to be Christlike 7. Submit to the Will and Word of God
Close Out Counseling is biblical. As He does so we do… Counseling is biblical. As He does so we do… Seven Characteristics of Biblical Counseling Seven Characteristics of Biblical Counseling L.E.A.D.E.R. Counseling Practicals L.E.A.D.E.R. Counseling Practicals 1. LISTEN 2. EMPATHIZE 3. AFFIRM 4. DIRECT 5. ENLIST 6. REFER Resources: Handbook on Counseling Youth by Josh McDowell’s Resources: Handbook on Counseling Youth by Josh McDowell’s