Authoritarian: Highly controlling, little responsiveness. Permissive/Indulgent: Highly responsive, little control. Authoritative: Highly Controlling, highly responsive. Uninvolved/Neglectful: Little control, little responsiveness.
Children also have styles called temperaments. Parenting is interactive; a child’s temperament and their parent’s style of parenting mesh, each affecting the other.
Authoritarian parents are strict and highly controlling. They set high standards and expect obedience and maturity from their children. They expect their rules to be followed and not to be questioned. Authoritarian parents love their children but can seem aloof, rarely showing affection.
Example: “Because I said so!” “My way or the highway!” “You’ll do as I say when I say it!”
Children with Authoritarian parents tend to be quiet, obedient, and stay out of trouble. They feel guilty and depressed, internalizing their frustrations. They lack self esteem, confidence, spontaneity, and curiosity. They tend to be socially withdrawn and have difficulties forming relationships. As adolescents, they sometimes rebel, leaving home before age 20.
Permissive parents are warm and accepting but exert little control over their children. Very low levels of maturity and demands are required of their children. Extensive parent-child communication but little discipline. Parent is more of a friend than a disciplinary figure. They are supportive, but do not feel responsible for shaping their children.
These children are impulsive and lack self control. They tend to be selfish and immature because they’re not taught how their actions affect others. They tend to achieve less at school and have trouble forming relationships. They usually maintain a good relationship with their parents into adulthood.
Authoritative parents are firm but kind. They set limits and use natural consequences to help their children learn. They set high standards and encourage independence. They demand maturity but are more forgiving than punishing if the child does something wrong. Authoritative parents consider themselves more as guides rather than authorities or friends.
This parenting style gives the best outcomes. This child is cheerful, self-controlled, lively and self-reliant. The have good self confidence, are achievement orientated and socially successful. They cope well with stress and regulate their emotions well. Teachers and peers usually like these children.
Uninvolved parents demand little and respond minimally. There are no rules for the child but also no communication or encouragement from the parent. Parents don’t know what their kids are doing and seem not to care. This parenting style is often associated with neglect and abuse.
Like children of authoritarian parents, these children are socially withdrawn and lack self esteem. They are not securely emotionally attached to their parents and this leads to confusion and depression. They are more likely to engage in anti-social and/or risky behavior. Many exhibit antisocial behavior and may end up as criminals. They are the worst performing of all the parenting styles. The combination of permissiveness and indifference or rejection in varying degrees has detrimental effects on children.
“Children everywhere benefit if they believe that their parents appreciate them; by the same token, children everywhere suffer if they feel rejected and unwanted.” (Berger, Kathleen Stassen. Invitation to the Life Span. New York: Worth, 2010. Print.)
The End Sources: Berger, Kathleen Stassen. Invitation to the Life Span. New York: Worth, 2010. Print. Gurian, Anita. "Parenting Styles/Children's Temperaments: The Match | AboutOurKids.org." Parenting Styles/Children's Temperaments: The Match. NYU Child Study Center, n.d. Web. 02 Apr. 2013. "Effects Of Parenting Style." Effects Of Parenting Style. All-About- Motherhood.com, n.d. Web. 02 Apr. 2013. Sailor, D. H. "Effects of Parenting Styles on Children's Behavior (page 2)." Effects of Parenting Styles on Children's Behavior. Education.com, n.d. Web. 02 Apr. 2013. Moore, Ayra. "The Impact of Parenting Styles on Children's Development." LIVESTRONG.COM. N.p., 12 Sept. 2011. Web. 02 Apr. 2013.