THEY’RE BORING THEY’RE DIFFICULT THEY ARE POINTLESS SCARED OF FAILING??? THEY ARE STRESSFUL
IT IS YOUR JOB TO MAKE SURE YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT YOUR ASSESSMENT IS ASKING OF YOU! For any subject, you are assessed on criteria. They will be different for different subjects and different teachers. But if you know what your marker/teacher/assessor wants it makes the process easier.
RUBRICS In English we use rubrics Low (2)Very Low (1)UG (0) Introduction Sophisticated contention developed in response to the topic. Main points have been very well introduced. Clear contention developed in response to the topic. Main points have been well introduced. Some direct response and development of contention in response to the topic. Main points have been introduced. Limited direct relationship between contention and the essay topic. Some points have been introduced but they are not clear. No direct relationship to the essay topic. Points are not clear Not shown/ incomplete Body Paragraphs Contains excellent evidence that supports points made and are clearly linked to the topic sentence. TEEL structure used with confidence. Points are thoroughly elaborated on. Quotes are well integrated into the writing. Contains good evidence that support the points made and are linked to the topic sentence. Key points are elaborated on. Clear attempt at integration of quotes into the writing. Contains satisfactory evidence that, in part, support the points made, but are only vaguely linked to the topic sentence. Some attempts made to elaborate on key ideas. Quotes are not well integrated into the writing. Does not contain enough evidence and/ or evidence does not support the points made. Evidence is not linked satisfactorily to the topic, main points are not elaborated on. Quotes show no direct relationship to the writing. Evidence is not linked to the topic. Paragraphs are primarily descriptive in nature. No evidence of quotes or examples being used to support points being made. Not shown/ incomplete Conclusion All main points are restated and contention is very clearly reinforced. Most main points are restated. The contention is reinforced. Some main points are restated. The contention is reinforced. Important points have been left out of the conclusion. The contention is not effectively reinforced. Conclusion is vague or non-existent. The contention is not restated. Not shown/ incomplete Knowledge of Text Excellent knowledge of text – evident in textual examples, quotes, analysis of themes, characters and setting. Very good knowledge of text – evident in textual examples, quotes, analysis of themes, characters and setting. Satisfactory knowledge of text – evident in textual examples, quotes, analysis of themes, characters and setting. Some knowledge of the text– evident through some textual examples, quotes, analysis of themes, characters and setting. Poor knowledge of the text– evident through the lack of textual examples, quotes, analysis of themes, characters and setting. Not shown/ incomplete Mechanics of Language, including spelling & Punctuation Excellent sequencing and organisation of subject matter, grammatical accuracy, control of sentence structure and paragraphing. Very minimal spelling or punctuation errors. Very good sequencing and organisation of subject matter, grammatical accuracy, control of sentence structure and paragraphing. Few spelling or punctuation errors. Satisfactory sequencing and organisation of subject matter, grammatical accuracy, control of sentence structure and paragraphing. Some spelling and punctuation errors. Adequate sequencing and organisation of subject matter, grammatical accuracy, control of sentence structure and paragraphing. Numerous spelling or punctuation errors. Poor sequencing and organisation of subject matter, grammatical accuracy, control of sentence structure and paragraphing. Contained frequent errors that detract from the writing. Not shown/ incomplete Comments: /25
WHAT YOU ARE BEING ASSESSED ON THIS TIME : Introduction Body paragraphs Conclusion Knowledge of text Mechanics of language
To what extent does Christof genuinely care for Truman? OR Do you think that Christof is right to prevent Truman entering the real world? Your Turn - Practice Essay!
1.UNDER LINE KEY WORDS 2. SYNONYMS FOR KEY WORDS 3. QUESTION THE QUESTION 4. REWRITE TOPIC IN YOUR OWN WORDS 5. MINIPLAN ….
5. MINI PLAN Short Answer to essay question or statement of what you will argue Change to Contention in formal, direct language Main reasons - aim for at least three, more if you can 1.TS, LS & egs Truman wants to travel and leave Seahaven - it’s wrong not to allow him this freedom 2. TS, LS & egs Truman wants real relationships and emotions, not ones with actors that are scripted and manipulated 3. TS, LS & egs Christof seems to care more about ratings and the future of the show than Truman’s happiness and rights. 4. TS, LS & egs Christof does love Truman but in a paternalistic way. He thinks he is doing the right thing, trying to protect him but he is not.
6. WRITING INTRODUCTIONS Author, title General opening sentence that relates to the question Clearly respond to the topic Signpost your body paragraphs Clearly state your contention Possible incorporation of a quote/s
Do you think that Christof is right to prevent Truman entering the real world? The Truman Show directed by Peter Weir shows the connection of reality television to modern society through a television show called ‘The Truman Show.’ In this television show, the protagonist and ‘star’ of the show, Truman Burbank, has his life manipulated and filmed on an island inhabited by actors since his birth. Christof utilises every possible technique to prevent Truman entering the real world as he fails to regard the wishes of Truman, cares mainly about the success of the show rather than Truman’s happiness and manipulates not only Truman’s life but also his emotions. At times, Christof does show a genuine desire to protect Truman from harm, but his paternalistic love is ultimately not enough to prevent Truman from wanting to discover the real world for himself, to live his own life and follow his own dreams, not those created for him and controlled by Christof. Director, title General opening sentence that relates to the question Clear response to the question Signpost your body paragraphs Clearly state your contention Possible incorporation of a quote
STYLES OF INTROS Brief, main argument (contention) at the end Longer, more detailed Focuses on the quote (if the topic contains a quote) Main argument in the second sentence
7. BODY PARAGRAPHS Topic Sentence (T) Evidence (E) Explain (E) Link (L)
T OPIC SENTENCES State what the paragraph will be about, clearly showing how this relates to the topic - ALWAYS REREAD THE QUESTION AFTER YOUR TOPIC SENTENCE. Ask yourself, does the TS clearly relate to the question and your arguments? If not, rewrite it.
For which paragraphs on your plan could you use these TSs? At the end of the film when Truman and Christof ‘meet’ for the first time, Christof tries to convince Truman that he is trying to protect Truman and that he is better off staying in Seahaven. Truman was adventurous from a young age but Christof had to contrive ways of dissuading him from wanting to go out exploring the world. When Truman discovers that all the relationships in his life are with actors pretending to be his friend, his wife, his mother, his everything, he is devastated and goes in search of the only person who ever told him the truth, Sylvia. As director of the longest running reality tv show in history, Christof tries everything to stop Truman finding out the truth and leaving Seahaven and bringing his show to an end.
E VIDENCE & EXPLANATION - Choose only evidence that backs up your argument, nothing that might undermine it - Choose evidence that demonstrates complexity and depth Find evidence in the text (eg. Quotes) and explain how it supports your contention Eg. When (insert context/incident/filmic device) (insert quote-change it to fit sentence structure) (insert explanation).
LINK Your Linking Sentence must show the connection between + The Topic in your Body Paragraph Your Contention in the Introduction
(T) Truman was adventurous from a young age but Christof had to contrive ways of dissuading him from wanting to go out exploring the world. (E) For example, at school in Geography, Truman’s teacher tells him that there is nothing left in the world to be discovered. When Truman is older, however, Christof takes this manipulation much further by writing the ‘death’ of Truman’s father at sea into the show. (E) This devastating event in Truman’s young life creates in him a fear of water, thereby controlling him for the rest of his life, stopping him from being able to leave Seahaven, despite his wanderlust and desire to seek freedom outside of Seahaven. (L) Truman eventually battles with and overcomes his fear, asserting his own will to show Christof he is no longer under his control, but the way Christof plays with Truman’s emotions and life, as though he is a toy, not a human being, is cruel and wrong.
Next… 8. THE CONCLUSION Restate your contention, explaining briefly how you have shown it to be true in your body paragraphs. This is a summary of your argument. End with a strong statement, preferably concise (short and to the point)
Finally… 9. PROOF READING & EDITING Re-read your draft looking for improvements in: Punctuation (Capital letters, full stops, quote marks) Spelling Use of TEEL Presentation