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D2: WOW! Sexuality: Resources & Tips for Parents Struggling to talk about sexuality with your sons and daughters? This workshop will provide parents with.

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Presentation on theme: "D2: WOW! Sexuality: Resources & Tips for Parents Struggling to talk about sexuality with your sons and daughters? This workshop will provide parents with."— Presentation transcript:

1 D2: WOW! Sexuality: Resources & Tips for Parents Struggling to talk about sexuality with your sons and daughters? This workshop will provide parents with information, strategies, and tips on sexuality, social skills, and behavior to meet the unique needs of youth with disabilities. Presented by: Ruth Price, MPH, MEd, CHES

2 Remember when… Norman Rockwell: “Facts of Life”

3 S-E-X + Disabilities + Teens

4 What to Expect ① Explore personal values ② Understand myths & facts about sexuality & disability ③ Increase comfort level regarding talking to your teens & young adults about sex ④ Next steps: where to go for help and support

5 House Rules: Confidentiality What happens in Vegas… …stays in Vegas!

6 WHAT? S-E-X! SEXUALITY? O What is sex? O What is sexuality? O What is sexual health? O What is sexual identify? O What is sexual gender? O What is sexual intercourse? O What’s normal? What’s not?

7 Sexuality is…. O Large concept, multiple dimensions O Who we are, our sense of identity, and how we see our places in the world, and what we believe about our potentials and capabilities O Cumulative process, continuing throughout our lives O Shapes our sexual expectations & behaviors O As we grow and mature our needs change, our capabilities change, our desire for intimacy and closeness changes O Sex (male/female) O Gender identify/role O Biology O Sexual orientation O Psychology O Pleasures, desires and thoughts O Values O Social skills & relationships (ourselves, friends, care-givers, partners)

8 Myths About Sexuality & Disability O Asexual (undersexed) O Not desirable, can’t have “real” sex O More important things to worry about O Child-like (dependent) O “Shouldn’t have sex if live in institutions, group homes or with parents” O Sexually impulsive/uncontrollable (oversexed)


10 Check in…where are you?

11 3 Areas to Think About 2. Individual Values appropriate behavior depends on family values mutual/consensual/legal 3. Social Competence develop positive self image am I ‘normal’ social opportunities to grow & learn from social errors common mistakes 1. Basic Facts & Personal Safety Privacy Boundaries  body identification  correct terminology Personal space  self  others Safety issues  okay touch (good v. bad)  self-advocacy Pleasure/Intimacy

12 Parents & Older Siblings: Start Talking & Modeling O Recognize sexuality as a positive, healthy part of being human O Make information understandable O Use pictures O “Teachable moments” O Repeat, repeat, repeat O Review & check-in O Role model healthy relationships & boundaries

13 What goes where? On who? I’m not normal!

14 Bold + Uncomfortable =Safety O Prepare your child to be his/her own protector O Help your child understand his/her body O Know accurate terms O Talk about body ownership “your parts” O Intuitive signals: sweaty palms & underarms, shaky knees & legs, “tummy ache”, heart beat faster, “tingly down there” ??? O Ask parent or trusted adult

15 “M” Word O Private O Alone O 1 O Bedroom O Bathroom O Curtains O Door O Sign O Health O Hygiene Not a swear!

16 Sex ed. at home & school ? O Pre-K through Grade 12 Strands O Physical Health O Social & Emotional Health O Safety & Prevention O Personal & Community Health O Guiding principles for both parents & teachers O Sequential & coordinated teaching O Assess risks & make healthy decisions O Understand & communicate health information clearly O Create safe & supporting environment O Partnership O Repeat, repeat and repeat! Massachusetts Comprehensive Health Curriculum Framework, October 1999

17 Sample IEP Annual Goal O According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, the major objectives for sex education for all students with disabilities include: O Teaching children how to express physical affection appropriately O Discouraging inappropriate displays of affection, such as hugging strangers O Expressing clearly the expectation that their behavior should conform to family and societal standards for privacy and personal modesty O Teaching children the difference between behaviors acceptable in private setting and those acceptable in public O Teaching children their right to refuse to be touched at any time, and not to keep secrets from parents about having been touched inappropriately; and O Discussing pleasure and affection when educating children about sex The student will receive appropriate instruction to achieve understanding of body systems, human development, self-awareness, and sexuality.

18 Where to turn for help? O Look everywhere… Explore everyone… Ask others & share your experiences! O MA Department of Elementary & Secondary Education (DESE) MA Comprehensive Health Curriculum Framework, October 1999 ameworks/health/1999 O MA Department of Public Health: Bureau of Community Health and Prevention & MA Department of Developmental Services (DPH & DDS) Healthy Relationships, Sexuality & Disability Resource Guide 2013 Edition (available on line), Guide 2014 – coming soon ocs/dph/com- health/prevention/hrhs- sexuality-and-disability- resource-guide.pdf

19 P-O-W-E-R Approach O Preparation O prepare yourself, be informed, and (practice!) O Open Attitudes O comfortable talking about sex, dating, relationships, safety O Where are you? O Be present, be involved, be curious, ask, look & listen O Exposure O Need to see and interact people in varied relationships O Reality Check O YWD are Youth first! Teens, hormones, crushes, etc. experimenting with themselves and with relationships. Adapted from the National Consortium on Leadership & Disability for Youth

20 Questions ? ? ?

21 Thank you!

22 Health Quarters changing lives through health care & sexuality education 800.297.7738 O Non-profit, reproductive health & family planning agency O Provider of accessible health services in Beverly, Haverhill and Lawrence O HIV/STD’s screening, testing & treatment O Men, women, and teens O Affordable, knowledgeable & confidential services O Bilingual services O Outreach, education, technical assistance and professional development services

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