5Subjective rules make no sense How can I know how to behave? Maybe if I was in Europe
6Reality or Pretend? Propaganda or Truth? Is that real? Why does everyone lie? Am I a fool?
7Routines Are Never Routines Is Anything / Anyone Dependable? I’ll be there at 10.We will go outside rain or shine.You can have a piece of cake after your homework, and your big brother ate it and now it’s no more.
13Word Comprehension, Social Language, Tone Linguistics FollyLiteralWe aren’t deliberately rude, but…Context Clues ☐Meaning is constructed from a combination of the user & listener’s grammar & vernacular, background knowledge of the subject, inference of the speaker, & the ability of the listener to properly understand the speaker’s use of language & intent!Misunderstanding literary use of languageJokes, metaphors, idioms=We have our own lexiconWord Comprehension, Social Language, Tone
14The Assumptions… This kid is lazy. Why must that co-worker be so uncooperative?That boy in the grocery line sure is spoiled!That lady is just plain rude.Are you just plain stupid ?I think my neighbor is emotionally disturbed.You are just making things up to get attentionYou are not trying your hardest
16I got by with a little help from.. In the old days, communities watched neighborhood kids and offered guidance and support.
17BooksHow to: Make friends, Get a job, Understand language, Psych myself up to improve self-esteemLet me: Escape and learn skills that helped me get a job and take care of myself
18NeighborsWatched over me. Gave me advice. Made sure I went in during tornados I was fascinated with.Sharon and Steve – were guardian paid angels.
19Civic GroupsHated it, but it taught me I could be part of a group and still be alone. I could cook the bacon while the other kids ate. And I could relate to nature and calm down. I could walk the hillside and find peace. Meditation.
33I can believe in me. The part of me no one can take away I can believe in me. The part of me no one can take away. My intuition is real and alive and ready to help me apply what I’ve learned and figure out what I cannot yet figure out.
34I look at my children and think – I’ve put a few differently abled kids on this planet and one walks with the norm. I know together, they will continue to spread the message of respect and kindness, acceptance and support.
35Self- Affirmation Pledge I am not defective. I am different. I will not sacrifice myself worth for peer acceptance. I am a good and interesting person. I will take pride in myself. I am capable of getting along with society. I will ask for help when I need it. I am a person who is worthy of others' respect and acceptance. I will find a career interest that is well suited to my abilities and interests. I will be patient with those who need time to understand me. I am never going to give up on myself. I will accept myself for who I am.Liane Holliday Willey,Asperger Syndrome in the Family:Redefining Normal
36Language SupportsThink it don’t say itWrite it in a journalScript appropriate replies & inquiriesTeach literary terms: idioms, metaphors, subtext & sarcasm, similesReadwritething.orgTeach propagandaBeware your own speech doesn’t confuseBe concreteCheck for understandingTeach word histories & originsTeach euphemismsTeach conversation skillsEncourage Aspie to question & not fear asking- “What did you mean?”Realize the Aspie’s language is not technically wrong, just precise & very dependent on definition of terms, background schema & context.Discuss & illustrate other examples of the same thoughts that could have been expressed more simply or more naturally. For example, “My shoes lost their tensile strength” could be “My shoes sole broke”
37Social Interaction Supports Form a social skills groupDirectly teach the rules of friendshipRealize there are different types of friendshipUse cartoons and drawings to illustrate positive vs. negative social behaviorGoofus and GallantUse graphs to chart positive reactions to rocky situationsTeach situations and places and people to avoid- leave nothing and no one out!Offer tons of hands-on observingBuild that schema!!Establish a safe place and safe people to seek out when the need arrivesEstablish social behavior groups, but include NT kids, tooTeach nonverbal communication skillsTeach the exceptionsto the ruleRehearse personal spaceEstablish a peer aidPay a friend / hire a bullyIf necessary keep the Aspie out of unstructured work groupsUse movies, TV shows and plays to illustrate appropriate social behavior and inappropriate behavior
38Perseveration Supports Be careful when teaching subjects with potentially disturbing images (history and language arts)Add a transition image following the intense imageEstablish a safe place for self-dialogueProvide exercises that helps the Aspie have a self-regulated program for obsessing. For example, “Write down your thoughts on this piece of paper, then put the paper in this box. Put the box away for X amount of time. Think about the thoughts ONLY when you open the box.”Know that when the interest has to be put aside, the transition to change or stop might be traumaticUse the special interest as a motivator, reward & calming toolPraise effortBring the special interest into the academic setting or to family gatherings, etc.Time with the interest as a reward for appropriate behavior
39General Supports Defend Aspie individuality Social script Hear perseverationsCalm the AspieInterpret the world for the AspieProvide (or find some one to) whatever assistance seems necessaryEncourage the Self Affirmation pledgeDo your homework: read material that fits your situation, stay ahead of new ideas and form the ideas that make sense for the personal situation at handStudy and apply safety issues including how to address and interact with first responders, strangers, new situations, etc.
40And finally, I think of my father And finally, I think of my father. He was beat up, ridiculed, left out, ignored, without many friends… but he was the most dependable, kind-hearted, gracious, most intelligent and best grandfather in the world. He was a classic Aspie. And he deserved far better treatment than he received. WE WILL help the world see how fabulous our people are!