Presentation on theme: "Communication.. is a dance. Would you like to know how to … … … ? be honest without insulting people be heard to your complete satisfaction handle conflict."— Presentation transcript:
Would you like to know how to … … … ? be honest without insulting people be heard to your complete satisfaction handle conflict with confidence transform anger into positive communication never hear blame or criticism again inspire willing cooperation deepen your good relationships enjoy people NVC is a way to develop life-changing abilities.
The inner-outer dance Expressing myself Receiving you
8 INNER & OUTER Dances 3 inner-outer dances for role-playing 13 steps dance to learn and practise the basic skills integration & connection to internalize the process and develope connection fluency dance to remain compassionate.. whatever the situation 5 inner dances for transformative inner processes self-empathy dance Take time for self-care! to reach out for clarity and self-empowerment anger/shame dance transform anger and shame into constructive internal states and connect with what really matters Yes/No dance move beyond inner conflict & uncertainty to take a decision you won't regret educator/chooser dance explore something you did that you regret and gain genuine self-acceptance transforming pain dance transform the pain of unmet needs into the beauty of needs.. to heal deep pain from the past
Feel it !!Feel it !! Feel it.. in your body Feel the power of embodying this process.. step by step
How to use the Dance Floor 1 Learn how NVC works in a conversation Practice the 13 basic steps of NVC Transform judgments into need-based awareness. Discover the 3 modes: Connecting with myself – Receiving you – Expressing myself Choose between the 3 modes, moment by moment Dance on the Dance Floor Pause while you sense your intention for this 'dance' Now step onto the Dance Floor and choose which step to start on. You can start anywhere! Continue to make choices about where to go to next.
How to use the Dance Floor 2 Explore an imagined conversation The 13 steps Dance helps you explore an imagined conversation, using the NVC process in order to 'dance' the steps you need to know something about the path: Observation, Feelings, Needs, Request Imagine what the other person says Whenever you feel the other person would say something, include that in your imagined conversation. Say it aloud.. or just imagine them saying it. Or ask someone to play the role or the other person. The other person speaks from outside the intention frame. Everything inside the intention frame is you!
Non-emphatic responses are Advise “I think you should…” “How come you didn’t…?” One-upping “That’s nothing! Once I was…” Educate “This could turn into a positive experience for you if you" Console “It wasn’t your fault. You did the best you could.” Story-telling “That reminds me of the time …” Shut down “Cheer up. Don’t feel so bad." "Don't cry..” Interrogate “When did this begin? Where exactly was this?” Explain “I would have called but…”
First of all : be compassionate & loving with yourself !
J UDGEMENTS & B LAMES The very first dance though is.. Empty all your anger and disappointment.. Feel it, shout it, give space to all the ugly words and thoughts that want to come to your mind !! JUST KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT !! DO NOT SAY A WORD !! C ONNECT WITH ALL YOUR
NOW C ONNECT WITH YOURSELF What was my observation? What exactly did I see, hear.. where, when? How are my feelings? be precise! name what you feel right now. Which of my needs are (not) met? be specific! name what you need right now. What is my request to feel good? be specific! What would you like to be done.
E XPRESS YOURSELF This is what I observed. That's what I saw, read, heard... That's how I feel about it. These are my needs. This is my request to feel good? I woul like (you) to.......
R ECEIVE THE OTHER Aha, this is your observation. this is what you saw, heard, read.. Aha, that's how you feel about it. Aha, these are the needs that are (not) met for you right now. ä$ Aha, this is your request to feel good.