Presentation on theme: "If you were to sit down and start reading the articles that have been published about bullies over the past few years you would discover that there are."— Presentation transcript:
1 If you were to sit down and start reading the articles that have been published about bullies over the past few years you would discover that there are a lot of people who believe that bullies perform a positive role in our society and that a lot of other people believe that bullies perform a negative and destructive role in our society.
2 Some people will argue that the world is tough and that the bullies are actually kind people who only bully others to make them stronger. Once the bully sees that they have made the other person stronger, they will look for someone else who they can also help to make stronger. Other people argue that bullies will do as much psychological damage as they can to their vulnerable target and will then totally ignore that person. Once the bully sees that they have weakened their target, they will look for someone else who they can also make weaker.
3 Bullying is hard to understand because one bully might bully other people for one reason and another bully might bully other people for another reason. Before discussing the reasons why the bully feels the need to bully others, it might be useful to discuss the difference between the types of spiritual worlds that most people (including the bully) live in and the type of spiritual world that the bully’s vulnerable target lives in.
4 Collective Subconscious of the Group Most of us feel that we have a pretty good idea as to what is right and what is wrong, and we are usually not afraid to express our opinions about what we consider to be right and what we consider to be wrong. How can we be so sure that we are right about an issue when the guy who lives down the block from us is so sure that we are wrong about the same issue?Collective Subconscious of the GroupGroup Member #1Group Member #2Group Member #3
5 Collective Subconscious of the Group The guy who lives down the block began a socialization process of automatically exchanging his subconscious spiritual thoughts and feelings with other people through the Collective Subconscious early in life. We also began the same socialization process early in life. How can our opinions be so different? Even though we were each developing spiritual links with other people as we were growing up, we were not developing our spiritual links with the same people.Collective Subconscious of the GroupGroup Member #1Group Member #2Group Member #3
6 Collective Subconscious of the Group The people who we developed our spiritual links with became an important part of our thought processes. They became like a conscience telling us what was right and what was wrong. Whenever we would express our opinions about an issue, we would feel that we were being “watched” and that we were being supported by these people who we were spiritually linked to. And the guy who lived down the block also felt that he was being “watched” and that he was being supported by the people who he was spiritually linked to.Collective Subconscious of the GroupGroup Member #1Group Member #2Group Member #3
7 Collective Subconscious of the Group Our spiritual connections with the people who we were spiritually linked to were very real and very dynamic and those spiritual connections were a very important part of our reality. And the spiritual connections of the guy down the block were very real and very dynamic to him. Those spiritual connections were a very important part of his reality. We lived on the same block as the other guy but we lived in different spiritual worlds.Collective Subconscious of the GroupGroup Member #1Group Member #2Group Member #3
8 Collective Subconscious of the Group There are a lot of vulnerable people in our physical world who do not consider their spiritual connections with other people to be an important part of their reality. When a vulnerable guy (or a vulnerable girl) hears other people talking about the spiritual worlds that they live in, the vulnerable guy will not really understand what those people are talking about.Collective Subconscious of the GroupGroup Member #1Group Member #2Group Member #3
9 The vulnerable guy (Number 4 below) might have originally gotten into the difficult position of not living in a real spiritual world because he was only given a limited role in his family.Number 4Number 4
10 If the family gives the vulnerable guy only a limited role in the spiritual entity that is made up of the family members (and takes away some of his spiritual energy), they might create a fantasy about the vulnerable guy that says that he was given an equal role in the family and that he is capable of normal exchanges of spiritual energy with other people.Number 4
11 When the vulnerable guy starts to develop relationships with people outside of his family, the people who he meets will be confused. Due to the fact that they believe the family’s fantasy that the vulnerable guy is living in a real spiritual world, they will wonder why they are only able to develop a very practical and very limited type of a relationship with him.
12 Most of the people who the vulnerable guy meets develop a deep set of emotions (which is the most important part of their soul). They also develop a practical set of emotions. An example of a person using their practical emotions might be a car saleswoman merging the practical part of her soul with the souls of her customers for the purpose of getting them to buy an automobile from her.
13 When a customer comes into the car dealership she tries to build rapport with that customer by developing a practical sort of spiritual attachment with them. After creating this spiritual attachment she will be exchanging subconscious spiritual thoughts with the customer. She might allow the customers to take a test drive with the car.
14 One customer who takes a test drive will take the car out into the country to see how fast it will go. Another customer will use the car to pick up their kids after school. When the customers come back and the salesperson realizes that the test drive has helped them to overcome their doubts about the car, she will be happy that they want to buy the car but she will not know where they took the car on the test drive.
15 But even though she does not know consciously where the customer took the car on the test drive she might know at a deep subconscious level where the customer took the car and she might know what the customer was thinking during the test drive because of the practical spiritual attachment that she formed with the customer when the customer walked into the car dealership.
16 The vulnerable guy has exchanges of spiritual energy with other people that are similar to those of the saleswoman. The saleswoman has exchanges of spiritual information with her customers at a deep level, but it is a temporary sort of a spiritual exchange that will not lead to a relationship. And the vulnerable guy also has exchanges of spiritual energy with other people that tend to not become very strong.
19 The woman who the vulnerable guy meets is also exchanging her spiritual energy through the Collective Subconscious with other people who she knows. A lot of spiritually and psychologically vulnerable guys might have gotten into a pattern where they are interfacing with a woman (who we will call a “primary woman”) who is only merging the practical part of her soul with the vulnerable guy.
23 The vulnerable guy (Number 4 below) might be picking up some strong emotional feelings because he can sense that there is a magical exchange of spiritual energy taking place between himself and the secondary women. The secondary women are receiving the vulnerable guy’s spiritual energy through the Collective Subconscious and the vulnerable guy is receiving their spiritual energy.Number 4
24 The secondary women might get upset with the vulnerable guy for sending them his subconscious thoughts and feelings through the Collective Subconscious and then not developing a deeper relationship with them. They will think that the vulnerable guy is leading them on and they will want him to stop sending his subconscious thoughts and feelings to them through the Collective Subconscious.Number 4
26 The vulnerable guy might have also gotten into a pattern of interfacing with other men who don’t want to get close to him personally but who will relay the vulnerable guy’s subconscious thoughts and feelings to other men who they know.Number 4
27 These men who are receiving the vulnerable guy’s subconscious thoughts and feelings through the Collective Subconscious will wonder why they are sensing that the vulnerable guy is trying to start a friendship with them and is then backing off and not developing the relationship.Number 4
28 They do not understand that the vulnerable guy’s relationship with them is dependent upon another man transmitting his subconscious thoughts and feelings to them. The men who are receiving the vulnerable guy’s subconscious thoughts and feelings will eventually want to stop receiving these transmissions.Number 4
29 When the woman and the man who transmit the vulnerable guy’s subconscious thoughts and feelings (his emotions) to other people realize what is happening, they might take on the role of a bully and they might create a lie that says that the vulnerable guy purposely likes to hurt other people emotionally.Number 4
30 They might expand upon their lie and say that the vulnerable guy is not only guilty of leading other people on emotionally, but that he is also guilty of continuing to send his emotions to other people through the Collective Subconscious when he knows that they do not want to receive those emotions.
31 The woman or the man might purposely start an interaction with the vulnerable guy for the purpose of getting him in trouble. They know that by starting an interaction with him without really accepting him they will be relaying his emotions to other people through the Collective Subconscious.
32 The woman and the man also know that when the other people receive the vulnerable guy’s emotions through the Collective Subconscious they are going to reject those emotions, and they are going to send a lot of bad vibrations back to the vulnerable guy through the Collective Subconscious.
33 It would never occur to the vulnerable guy that he might be blamed for leading other people on emotionally. But the man bully and the woman bully created a lie saying that he was purposely sending unwanted emotions to other people through the Collective Subconscious and then these bullies purposely relayed his emotions to those people.
34 The vulnerable guy needs to somehow communicate to other people that he did not intend to force his emotions on other people and that it was the bullies who purposely relayed his emotions to other people through the Collective Subconscious. As he tries to convince other people of his innocence the bullies will try to convince other people that the vulnerable guy is guilty.
35 One of the arguments that the bullies might use to convince other people that the vulnerable guy is guilty is that he sometimes seems to think that he is in a relationship with another person when he is not. The vulnerable guy knows that he sometimes gives other people this impression, but he does not know why this happens and he feels that he does not really believe that he is developing a relationship when this happens.
36 What is happening in these situations is that when a man bully or a woman bully take advantage of the vulnerable guy by doing something to him that is unfair, some of bully’s emotions will be forced onto the vulnerable guy. After the vulnerable guy picks up these emotions he will, without his knowledge, pass those emotions off to other people. The other people who he passes these emotions off to will start to develop an emotional relationship with the bully because the vulnerable guy will be relaying the bully’s emotions to them through the Collective Subconscious.
37 The vulnerable guy knows that what is happening is a long way from being a relationship because he knows that he is not receiving strong emotions from the other person. But he does not understand why he cannot just relax with this person who he does not believe he has formed a relationship with. He cannot relax with this person because the bully has gotten him to force the bully’s emotions onto the other person and the bully will not allow the vulnerable guy to back off and relax.
38 During the time immediately before a man bully or a woman bully takes advantage of the vulnerable guy, it is very likely that the bully will start to act kind of odd. They will start saying stupid things that make the people around them start to avoid the bully and start to criticize them. The bully has at this point used up the spiritual energy that they had stolen from other people in the past and the bully is becoming weaker.
39 The man bully or the woman bully needs to make a conquest The man bully or the woman bully needs to make a conquest. They need to connect their shallow soul to the soul of another person, and they use the vulnerable guy to accomplish this. When the vulnerable guy starts an interaction with another person after being bullied, the soul of the man bully or the woman bully will attach itself to that other person. That is why it appears that the vulnerable guy is in a relationship. But the relationship is not between the vulnerable guy and the other person. It is between the bully and the other person.
40 The man bully or the woman bully will now start to feel emotionally satisfied and the people who had been laughing at them for their insecurity will now start to respect the bully once again. The vulnerable guy will notice that the new person who he started an interaction with might act friendly towards him for a short period of time thinking that he has started a relationship with them, but after a while they will turn cold towards him when they realize that he has done something that activated their emotions and then did not follow through and develop the relationship further.
41 Deep in the vulnerable guy’s mind he might believe that someday the man bully or the woman bully might want to become friends with him. He knows that his interactions with the bully have been positive for the bully. He has seen how the bully gets transformed from a somewhat shallow person into a person with a certain amount of confidence after the bully has an interaction with him and for this reason he might imagine that the bully might like him. But that is not really true.
42 The bully will eventually “use up” the spiritual energy that they received from the person who the vulnerable guy had relayed their emotions to. And in “using up” that spiritual energy they also “used up” the energy that the vulnerable guy had put into the bully’s relationship with that person. For this reason, in most situations there is no potential for additional spiritual energy exchanges between the man bully or woman bully and the vulnerable guy once the bully has used up that energy.
43 But if the bully and the vulnerable guy are in a work situation or a school situation where they are forced to continue interacting with each other, the bully may end up bullying the vulnerable guy several times over a period of months or years. In this type of situation the energy exchanges between them might eventually become fairly strong, but it will be negative type of energy that is being exchanged that cannot develop into a positive relationship.
44 There is another type of bullying that can happen when a bully and a vulnerable guy are in a work situation or a school situation. If the bully is in a position of power and if somebody in the group has a behavior problem, the bully might be reluctant to punish that person if the person who has a behavior problem is somebody who the bully likes. They might decide to punish the vulnerable guy instead.
45 When this sort of thing happens the people in the group know that the person with the behavior problem has done something wrong and they are waiting to see what the punishment will be. They know that this person must “pay for their sins”. If the bully at this point starts to lean unfairly on the vulnerable guy, the people in the group will realize that the bully is trying to transfer the punishment that was supposed to go to the person with the behavior problem to the vulnerable guy.
46 If the vulnerable guy doesn’t have the spiritual strength to stop this from happening the group might join together spiritually to transfer the blame from the person who has the behavior problem to the vulnerable guy. Not only is this psychologically damaging to the vulnerable guy, but once this happens the person with the behavior problem might start to purposely do things that are wrong and then enjoy watching while the vulnerable guy is forced to accept the shame and the blame.
47 The vulnerable guy may not have the spiritual strength to stop this sort of thing from happening, but he should make sure that he does not start to subconsciously think that he should be held responsible whenever somebody with a behavior problem gets away with something at his expense. The vulnerable guy should not have to take the blame for things that other people do.
48 Bullies are not really getting revenge against the vulnerable guy when they bully him for the purpose of getting him to force the bully’s emotions on other people. They are doing something that they feel that they need to do for themselves and the vulnerable guy is just a tool that they are using. The same thing is true when bullies use the vulnerable guy to divert shame and blame away from people who have behavior problems.
49 The point at which the bully might start wanting to get revenge against the vulnerable guy would be if the vulnerable guy started getting insight into what was taking place with his interactions with the bully and started to break free of the power that the bully has over him. At this point it might become personal for the bully, and the bully might actually develop some emotions towards the vulnerable guy (but they would naturally be negative emotions).
50 The bully might try to discourage the vulnerable guy by saying something to him such as “you seem to be annoyed by my abusiveness and by my bullying. Well, vulnerable guy, I am annoyed by your nervousness and your insecurity.” At this point the vulnerable guy should be careful not to apologize to the bully for not being more confident. The bully has not done anything to help the vulnerable guy become more confident.
51 When bullies make comments such as this they are only stating a half truth because the bullies are not acknowledging that people such as themselves are largely responsible for the lack of confidence that they are complaining about. It is similar in some ways to a person beating up another person and then afterward complaining that the other person doesn’t look very good. The vulnerable guy should remember that he is not responsible for pleasing the bully.
52 Bullying is a complex subject and as the future unfolds we will certainly be hearing a lot more about it. Hopefully the people who think that bullying is a normal part of life will realize that the bullies in today’s world have a lot more power than bullies had in the past, and these bullies will abuse that power if they are allowed to.Copyright 2013 Don Bergquist