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U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 1 Welcome To Discover Your Giftedness!

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Presentation on theme: "U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 1 Welcome To Discover Your Giftedness!"— Presentation transcript:

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2 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 1 Welcome To Discover Your Giftedness!

3 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 2 What do you think? Why did God create us with specific giftedness? What do you think? Why did God create us with specific giftedness?

4 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 3 The Bible teaches That everyone is gifted! That everyone is gifted! 1 Cor. 7:7 The Bible teaches That everyone is gifted! That everyone is gifted! 1 Cor. 7:7

5 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 4 “Every man has his proper gift of God.” 1 Cor. 7:7 “Every man has his proper gift of God.” 1 Cor. 7:7

6 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 5 Only God gives perfect gifts — “Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above,” James 1:17 Only God gives perfect gifts — “Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above,” James 1:17

7 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 6 The Psalmist reminds us — “It is He Who has made us and not we ourselves,” Psa. 100:3 The Psalmist reminds us — “It is He Who has made us and not we ourselves,” Psa. 100:3

8 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 7 “And He gave some apostles and some prophets, and some pastors and teachers,” Eph. 4:11

9 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 8 “For the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body,” Eph. 4:12

10 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 9 “Till we all come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God unto a perfect (mature) man,” Eph. 4:13 (mature) man,” Eph. 4:13 “Till we all come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God unto a perfect (mature) man,” Eph. 4:13 (mature) man,” Eph. 4:13

11 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 10 The path of every search must pass beyond yourself toward knowing God better.

12 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 11 How does the Bible describe our condition without God? “All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned everyone to his own way,” Isa. 53:6 How does the Bible describe our condition without God? “All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned everyone to his own way,” Isa. 53:6

13 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 12 Search The Scriptures — Eph. 4:11-13 Eph. 4:11-13 Why did God give Spiritual Gifts to Christians? Spiritual Gifts to Christians? Search The Scriptures — Eph. 4:11-13 Eph. 4:11-13 Why did God give Spiritual Gifts to Christians? Spiritual Gifts to Christians?

14 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 13 What do you think? Why should we concentrate on a few gifts, rather than every gift listed in the Scriptures? What do you think? Why should we concentrate on a few gifts, rather than every gift listed in the Scriptures?

15 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 14 Discovering spiritual gifts helps identify your motivations and abilities from a supernatural perspective.

16 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 15 "I tend to motivate others to get involved." 5 — Almost Always true; 4 — Often true; 3 — Sometimes true; 2 — Seldom true; 1 — Almost Never true. 5 — Almost Always true; 4 — Often true; 3 — Sometimes true; 2 — Seldom true; 1 — Almost Never true. Spiritual Gifts Profile Instructions: Concerning the following statements, ask yourself how you feel about each one — How true is each statement about you? Simply respond with the numerical rating as follows: Avoid, as much as possible, a 3 "Sometimes" choice. Don't hesitate choosing 5 (Almost Always) or 1 (Almost Never). Your desire to be humble or not exaggerate may cause you to choose more moderate responses. This may affect your results. Try to be as honest and accurate as possible. Is this statement "Almost Always", "Often", "Sometimes", "Seldom" or "Almost Never" true about you? Try to choose the "5, 4, 2 or 1." Avoid choosing the 3 "Sometimes." Is this statement "Almost Always", "Often", "Sometimes", "Seldom" or "Almost Never" true about you? Try to choose the "5, 4, 2 or 1." Avoid choosing the 3 "Sometimes." Place your choice in the appropriate numbered box in the Numerical Ratings Chart. Notice the Scoring and Plotting Instructions and Example.

17 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 16 Instructions: 5 — Almost Always true 4 — Often true 3 — Sometimes true 2 — Seldom true 1 — Almost Never true 5 — Almost Always true 4 — Often true 3 — Sometimes true 2 — Seldom true 1 — Almost Never true

18 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 17 Instructions: Example: "I tend to motivate others to get involved." Example: "I tend to motivate others to get involved."

19 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 18 Instructions: Is this statement “Almost Always” “Often” “Sometimes” “Seldom” or “Almost Never” true about you? Try to choose the “5, 4, 2 or 1.” Avoid choosing the 3 “Sometimes.” Is this statement “Almost Always” “Often” “Sometimes” “Seldom” or “Almost Never” true about you? Try to choose the “5, 4, 2 or 1.” Avoid choosing the 3 “Sometimes.”

20 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 19 Scoring Instructions: Be sure to rate your response to each choice from your Spiritual Gifts questionnaire. Record your choice 5, 4, 3, 2 or 1 in the appropriate blank space in front of each statement. 1. ___ I love to hear evangelistic messages. 2. ___ I tend to be irritated when people sin. 3. ___ Education is very important to me Example:

21 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 20 Scoring Instructions: Be sure to rate your response to each choice from the separate Spiritual Gifts questionnaire. Record your choice 5, 4, 3, 2 or 1 in the appropriate numbered question box. Total each column. Then follow the Plotting Instructions. 1. ___ I love to hear evangelistic message 2. ___ I tend to be irritated when people sin. 3. ___ Education is very important to me Transfer your numerical ratings numbers to the appropriate Numerical Ratings boxes Numerical Ratings Chart Scoring Example:

22 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 21 Total the columns A through G below and use those totals to plot your graph. Total the columns A through G below and use those totals to plot your graph. To plot your Spiritual Gifts Profile, use the totals above. Find the appropriate letter A - G in the SGP graph (left) and circle the number of the total under each letter. Notice Plotting Example. To plot your Spiritual Gifts Profile, use the totals above. Find the appropriate letter A - G in the SGP graph (left) and circle the number of the total under each letter. Notice Plotting Example. Numerical Ratings Chart Plotting Instructions: A B C D E F G PlottingExamplePlottingExample Spiritual Gifts Graph

23 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 22 Total the columns A through G below and use those totals to plot your graph. To plot your Spiritual Gifts Profile, use the totals above. Find the appropriate letter A - G in the SGP graph (left) and circle the number of the total under each letter. To plot your Spiritual Gifts Profile, use the totals above. Find the appropriate letter A - G in the SGP graph (left) and circle the number of the total under each letter. Numerical Ratings Chart Plotting Instructions: A B C D E F G Reading Your Graph: To determine which gifts are most like you, connect the circles. Notice which gifts are most intense. The higher on the profile, the more intense that gift describes you. Also notice your next highest and lowest plotting points to learn more about your overall gift tendencies. To determine which gifts are most like you, connect the circles. Notice which gifts are most intense. The higher on the profile, the more intense that gift describes you. Also notice your next highest and lowest plotting points to learn more about your overall gift tendencies A B Plotting Example: Plotting Example: Total: Total:

24 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 23 A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Your Spiritual Gifts Graph Administ. / Ruling Apostleship/Pioneer Discernment Evangelism Encourag. / Exhort. Knowledge Leadership Showing Mercy Pastor / Shepherd Faith Giving Hospitality Prophecy / Perceiving Serving / Ministry Teaching Wisdom Total the columns A through W and use those totals to plot your graph. Plotting Instructions To plot your Spiritual Gifts Graph, first complete the Scoring Instructions at 1. To plot your Spiritual Gifts Graph, first complete the Scoring Instructions at 1. Then use the totals from your Numerical Ratings Chart to plot your graph below. Find the appropriate letter A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O or P in the Spiritual Gifts Graph below and circle the number of the total under each letter. Notice Plotting Example. Then use the totals from your Numerical Ratings Chart to plot your graph below. Find the appropriate letter A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O or P in the Spiritual Gifts Graph below and circle the number of the total under each letter. Notice Plotting Example. Plotting Instructions To plot your Spiritual Gifts Graph, first complete the Scoring Instructions at 1. To plot your Spiritual Gifts Graph, first complete the Scoring Instructions at 1. Then use the totals from your Numerical Ratings Chart to plot your graph below. Find the appropriate letter A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O or P in the Spiritual Gifts Graph below and circle the number of the total under each letter. Notice Plotting Example. Then use the totals from your Numerical Ratings Chart to plot your graph below. Find the appropriate letter A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O or P in the Spiritual Gifts Graph below and circle the number of the total under each letter. Notice Plotting Example.

25 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 24 “For who the whole body fitly joined together and compacted by that which every joint supplies,” Eph. 4:16

26 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 25 Become more Christ-like by serving the Lord through your giftedness!

27 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 26 What do you think? How has identifying your spiritual giftedness helped you? What do you think? How has identifying your spiritual giftedness helped you?

28 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 27 ReviewReview Which are the three highest gifts on your SG graphs?

29 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D Cor. 1:27 But God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God hath chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty.

30 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 29 “Everybody is somebody in His body!” “Everybody is somebody in His body!” Every member is a minister!

31 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 30 The Gift of Administration / Ruling is seen in those who either like to organize or delegate to others. Administration / Ruling — In a word: Initiator Overuse: Expects too much Goal: Lead by example, not manipulation Scripture: Rom. 12:8, 1 Cor. 12:28; Acts 6:1-7 In a word: Initiator Overuse: Expects too much Goal: Lead by example, not manipulation Scripture: Rom. 12:8, 1 Cor. 12:28; Acts 6:1-7

32 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 31 Unlike Apostles of old, who actually saw the Lord and spread the Word from place to place, Apostles / Pioneers today have a clear vision to start new ministries where others may not. Apostleship / Pioneering In a word: Pioneer / Visionary Overuse: Pushes too hard / Too much authority Goal: Build deeper and stronger Scripture: Eph. 4:7,11; 1 Cor. 9:1-2; Gal. 2:8-10; 1 Cor. 12:28-29 In a word: Pioneer / Visionary Overuse: Pushes too hard / Too much authority Goal: Build deeper and stronger Scripture: Eph. 4:7,11; 1 Cor. 9:1-2; Gal. 2:8-10; 1 Cor. 12:28-29

33 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 32 The Gift of Craftsmanship is evident in those who are very handy at making things. They have the unusual ability to design and assemble things. Craftsmanship — In a word: Handy Overuse: Too focused on work, and not on others Goal: Create things to bless others, not glorify self Scripture: Ex. 31:3; 34:31-35; Acts 9:36-39; 2 Kings 22:5-6 In a word: Handy Overuse: Too focused on work, and not on others Goal: Create things to bless others, not glorify self Scripture: Ex. 31:3; 34:31-35; Acts 9:36-39; 2 Kings 22:5-6

34 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 33 The Gift of Creative Communication is obvious in those who enjoy performing or directing drama presentations. They love to express themselves and teach lessons through role playing and skits. Creative Communication — In a word: Actors or Actresses Overuse: Dramatic expression that leads to self glory Goal: Teach lessons, rather than focus on talent Scripture: Psa. 150:3-5; 2 Sam. 6:14-15; Mark 4:2, 33 In a word: Actors or Actresses Overuse: Dramatic expression that leads to self glory Goal: Teach lessons, rather than focus on talent Scripture: Psa. 150:3-5; 2 Sam. 6:14-15; Mark 4:2, 33

35 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 34 The Gift of Discernment is evident in those who have unusual ability to see through a lot of confusion and pinpoint problems and solutions. They are mostly concerned about right and wrong. Discernment — In a word: Listeners / Perceivers Overuse: Too critical or too quick to share Goal: Get more information before responding Scripture: 1 Cor. 12:7,10b; 1 Cor. 2:14 In a word: Listeners / Perceivers Overuse: Too critical or too quick to share Goal: Get more information before responding Scripture: 1 Cor. 12:7,10b; 1 Cor. 2:14

36 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 35 The Gift of Encouraging find themselves exhorting others. They are compelled to give advice. As counselors, they seem to often have steps-of-action. Encouraging / Exhorting — In a word: Encourager Overuse: Talks too much Goal: Apply truth, not create expectations Scripture: Rom. 12:6,8; Acts 11:23-24; Heb. 10:24-25 In a word: Encourager Overuse: Talks too much Goal: Apply truth, not create expectations Scripture: Rom. 12:6,8; Acts 11:23-24; Heb. 10:24-25

37 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 36 The Gift of Evangelism feel compelled to win souls. They seem to have the ability to communicate the gospel better than others. Their concern for witnessing to a lost and dying world is evident. Evangelism — In a word: Dynamic Overuse: Zeal Goal: Build disciples, not statistics Scripture: Eph. 4:7,11; Acts 8:26-40; Luke 19:1-10 In a word: Dynamic Overuse: Zeal Goal: Build disciples, not statistics Scripture: Eph. 4:7,11; Acts 8:26-40; Luke 19:1-10

38 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 37 The Gift of Faith is often found in those with the obvious ability to trust God in the most adverse circumstances. Every Christian has a measure of saving faith, but those with the Gift of Faith have a deeper dependence upon God and His Word. Faith — In a word: Optimist Overuse: Overly trusting and often proud of their faith Goal: Combine faith with works. Learn to be patient with others Scripture: 1 Cor. 12:7,9; Matt. 8:5-16; Heb. 11:1 In a word: Optimist Overuse: Overly trusting and often proud of their faith Goal: Combine faith with works. Learn to be patient with others Scripture: 1 Cor. 12:7,9; Matt. 8:5-16; Heb. 11:1

39 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 38 Givers tend to be seriously concerned about financial matters. The Gift of Giving also involves the "gift of getting." Givers are sensitive to how money is spent and saved. Giving — In a word: Steward Overuse: The power of money Goal: Sincere stewardship, not financial harassment Scripture: Rom. 12:6, 8b; Acts 4:32-35; 2 Cor. 9:7-8 In a word: Steward Overuse: The power of money Goal: Sincere stewardship, not financial harassment Scripture: Rom. 12:6, 8b; Acts 4:32-35; 2 Cor. 9:7-8

40 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 39 The Gift of Healing is evident in those with the divine power to pray and see people healed. They have unusual faith that God can heal anyone. The Gift of Healing is evident in those with the divine power to pray and see people healed. They have unusual faith that God can heal anyone. Healing — In a word: Restorer Overuse: Teaching everyone should be healed Goal: Focus on God's power and not their gift to heal Scripture: 1 Cor. 12:9, 28, 30; Acts. 3:1-16; Mark 2:1-12 In a word: Restorer Overuse: Teaching everyone should be healed Goal: Focus on God's power and not their gift to heal Scripture: 1 Cor. 12:9, 28, 30; Acts. 3:1-16; Mark 2:1-12

41 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 40 The Gift of Hospitality is that special interest in opening one's home for food and fellowship, or to just provide a place to stay for someone in need. Hospitality — In a word: Sociable Overuse: Take on too much / Get worn out Goal: Provide fellowship without sacrificing family time Scripture: 1 Pet. 4:9-10; Acts 16:13-15; Luke 14:12-14 In a word: Sociable Overuse: Take on too much / Get worn out Goal: Provide fellowship without sacrificing family time Scripture: 1 Pet. 4:9-10; Acts 16:13-15; Luke 14:12-14

42 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 41 The Gift of Intercession is found in those with a passion to pray. They feel compelled to intercede on behalf of those in distress. They faithfully petition God on a daily basis for specific needs. Intercession — In a word: Prayer Warrior Overuse: Neglect other practical needs and responsibilities Goal: Put feet on their prayers and do what needs to be done Scripture: Rom. 8:26-27; John 17:9-26; 1 Tim. 2:1-2; Col. 1:9-12, 4:12 In a word: Prayer Warrior Overuse: Neglect other practical needs and responsibilities Goal: Put feet on their prayers and do what needs to be done Scripture: Rom. 8:26-27; John 17:9-26; 1 Tim. 2:1-2; Col. 1:9-12, 4:12

43 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 42 The Gift of Interpretation is found in those who can translate what others speak in tongues. They have the unusual ability to glorify God through their miraculous interpretation of what would be otherwise unknown. Interpretation — In a word: Translator Overuse: Use translations to push own agenda Goal: Clarify what is spoken in tongues and build believers Scripture: 1 Cor. 12:10; 14:5; 14:26-28 In a word: Translator Overuse: Use translations to push own agenda Goal: Clarify what is spoken in tongues and build believers Scripture: 1 Cor. 12:10; 14:5; 14:26-28

44 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 43 The Gift of Knowledge is a supernatural revelation of certain facts in the mind of God, which gives instant and specific information that one would have no other way of knowing, except from God. Knowledge — In a word: Divine Insights Overuse: Make others feel inferior or ignorant Goal: Change lives, rather than impress others Scripture: 1 Cor. 12:7-8; 8:1b-2; Mark 2:6-8; John 1:45-50 In a word: Divine Insights Overuse: Make others feel inferior or ignorant Goal: Change lives, rather than impress others Scripture: 1 Cor. 12:7-8; 8:1b-2; Mark 2:6-8; John 1:45-50

45 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 44 The Gift of Leadership, much like the Gift of Administration / Ruling, is evident in those who demonstrate an unusual ability to influence others. They seem to have an independent determination to challenge and direct others toward a specific goal. Leadership — In a word: Dreamer Overuse: Too demanding and impatient Goal: Lead by example and willingness to be a servant Scripture: Rom. 12:6,8c; John 13:13-17; Heb. 13:17 ; John 1:45-50 In a word: Dreamer Overuse: Too demanding and impatient Goal: Lead by example and willingness to be a servant Scripture: Rom. 12:6,8c; John 13:13-17; Heb. 13:17 ; John 1:45-50

46 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 45 The Gift of Miracles is obvious in those who do powerful deeds. They have the unusual enablement to authenticate through miracles a specific ministry or message of God. Miracles — In a word: Powerful Overuse: Expecting God to always perform miracles Goal: Trust God, with or without the miracle Scripture: 1 Cor. 12:10, 28-29; John 2:1-11; Luke 5:1-11 In a word: Powerful Overuse: Expecting God to always perform miracles Goal: Trust God, with or without the miracle Scripture: 1 Cor. 12:10, 28-29; John 2:1-11; Luke 5:1-11

47 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 46 The Gift of Pastor / Shepherding is obvious in those who really enjoy leading others in serving the Lord. Unlike the Gift of Ministry / Serving / Helps, this gift involves the motivation to lead. Pastor / Shepherding — In a word: Leader Overuse: Takes advantage of other's trust Goal: Strong leadership, not manipulating the flock Scripture: Eph. 4:11; 1 Pet. 5:2-4 In a word: Leader Overuse: Takes advantage of other's trust Goal: Strong leadership, not manipulating the flock Scripture: Eph. 4:11; 1 Pet. 5:2-4

48 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 47 Prophets / Perceivers today are not exactly like prophets of old. Old Testament Prophets spoke the literal Word of God. Today people with the Gift of Prophecy / Perceiving seem to have the same seriousness and straight forward attitude toward truth. Prophecy / Perceiving / Proclaiming — In a word: Bold Overuse: Fighter Goal: Declare truth, not divide Christians Scripture: Eph. 4:7,11; 1 Cor. 14:1,3; 2 Pet 1:19-21 In a word: Bold Overuse: Fighter Goal: Declare truth, not divide Christians Scripture: Eph. 4:7,11; 1 Cor. 14:1,3; 2 Pet 1:19-21

49 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 48 When you think of Christians who serve faithfully behind the scenes, you think of those with the Gift of Serving / Ministry / Helps. They are interested in blessing others to serve the Lord. They love to help others. Serving / Ministry / Helps — In a word: Selfless Overuse: Takes on too much Goal: Be a servant, not a martyr Scripture: 1 Cor. 12:28; Act. 6:1-3; Rom. 16:1-2 In a word: Selfless Overuse: Takes on too much Goal: Be a servant, not a martyr Scripture: 1 Cor. 12:28; Act. 6:1-3; Rom. 16:1-2

50 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 49 The Gift of Showing Mercy demonstrates genuine sensitivity to suffering. They are compelled to help people reduce pain. They are concerned more with the person, than the reason for the suffering. Showing Mercy — In a word: Caring Overuse: Too sensitive Goal: Wise insights, not foolish responses Scripture: Rom. 12:6,8d; Matt. 5:7 In a word: Caring Overuse: Too sensitive Goal: Wise insights, not foolish responses Scripture: Rom. 12:6,8d; Matt. 5:7

51 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 50 The Gift of Teaching prefers explaining why things are true. While the prophet declares truth, the teacher explains the reasons it is true. Interested in research, those with the Gift of Teaching like to dig into seemingly insignificant details. Teaching — In a word: In-depth Overuse: Digs too deep Goal: Reveal truth, not exhaust it Scripture: Rom. 12:6,7b; Col. 3:16; Jam. 3:1; 2; 2 Tim. 2:2 In a word: In-depth Overuse: Digs too deep Goal: Reveal truth, not exhaust it Scripture: Rom. 12:6,7b; Col. 3:16; Jam. 3:1; 2; 2 Tim. 2:2

52 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 51 The Gift of Tongues is found in those with the divine ability to speak other languages. They have the unusual endowment to speak in a language that is not understood by most everyone present. Tongues — In a word: Conduit Overuse: Disruptive, overbearing and confusing Goal: Edify and encourage believers through positive messages Scripture: 1 Cor. 12:10, 28-30, 13:1, 14:1-33; Acts 2:1-11 In a word: Conduit Overuse: Disruptive, overbearing and confusing Goal: Edify and encourage believers through positive messages Scripture: 1 Cor. 12:10, 28-30, 13:1, 14:1-33; Acts 2:1-11

53 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 52 The Gift of Wisdom is the unique ability to use knowledge in a practical way. Those with this gift like to combine what they know with a serious reverence of God in order to influence others. Wisdom — In a word: Perceptive Overuse: Speak down to people Goal: Consistently trust and ask God for wisdom Scripture: 1 Cor. 12:7-8; Jam. 3:13-18 In a word: Perceptive Overuse: Speak down to people Goal: Consistently trust and ask God for wisdom Scripture: 1 Cor. 12:7-8; Jam. 3:13-18

54 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 53 What do you think? What have you learned about your spiritual motivations?

55 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 54 What do you think? How do you think knowing this can help you serve the Lord better?

56 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 55 What do you think? Why did God create us with specific personalities? What do you think? Why did God create us with specific personalities?

57 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 56 Psalms 139:13 describes us as “knit” in the womb. “For You covered me in my mother’s womb.” The word “knit” means we were intricately “embroidered.”

58 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 57 What do you think? How have you become more Christ-like since becoming a Christian? What do you think? How have you become more Christ-like since becoming a Christian?

59 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 58 Reading People

60 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 59 Fatal Error

61 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 60

62 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D Kind, Nice, Caring Proper, Formal Proper, Formal Demanding, Asserting Demanding, Asserting Outgoing, Active Outgoing, Active M L Example: Choose only ONE "Most" and only ONE "Least"

63 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D Kind, Nice, Caring Proper, Formal Proper, Formal Demanding, Asserting Demanding, Asserting Outgoing, Active Outgoing, Active M L Example: Choose only ONE "Most" and only ONE "Least"

64 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D M L ___ ___ ___ ___ M L Example: Choose only ONE "Most" and only ONE "Least" SS BB DD II BB CC DD II SS II

65 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 64 = 24 D I S C B D I S C B "L" "M" Counting Instructions Count the “D”s, “I”s, “S”s, “C”s and “B”s marked and transferred on the three “M” columns on the following Markings Sheet page. Then add the total number of “D”s, “I”s, “S”s, “C”s and “B”s spaces counted in the Total Boxes below. They should total 24. Count the “D”s, “I”s, “S”s, “C”s and “B”s marked and transferred on the three “M” columns on the following Markings Sheet page. Then add the total number of “D”s, “I”s, “S”s, “C”s and “B”s spaces counted in the Total Boxes below. They should total 24. Total Boxes M L ___ C I B D S C M L ___ M L ___ D I S C B D I S C B

66 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 65 Take your D, I, S & C Totals from your Total Boxes and plot Graphs 1 & 2. Count, but do not plot the "B"s. If a number is not on the graph, plot the closest number. Take your D, I, S & C Totals from your Total Boxes and plot Graphs 1 & 2. Count, but do not plot the "B"s. If a number is not on the graph, plot the closest number. = 24 "L" "M" “M” / Graph 1 “L” / Graph 2 D I S C D I S C B D I S C B

67 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 66 Two DISC Graphs "M" Graph 1 "M" Graph 1 "L" Graph 2 "L" Graph 2 "This is expected of me" "This is me" D I S C

68 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 67 Understanding Your Natural Motivations

69 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 68 What do you think? How much effect does divine design and environmental influences have on developing our personalities?

70 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 69 Passive Types Active Types Introvertive Reserved Realistic Withdrawn Introvertive Reserved Realistic Withdrawn Extrovertive Outgoing Optimistic Involved Extrovertive Outgoing Optimistic Involved

71 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 70 What do you think? How do you exhibit active and passive behavior?

72 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 71 “And whatsoever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men;” Col. 3:23

73 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 72 Task-Oriented Types High-Touch Form & Function Feeling & Fellowship High-Tech Caring Sharing Relationships Emotions Caring Sharing Relationships Emotions Plans Programs Projects Process Plans Programs Projects Process People-Oriented Types

74 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 73 How do you exhibit task and people skills?

75 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 74 Task- Oriented Types People- Oriented Types Passive Types Active Types D I SC

76 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 75 Study in your profile booklet the page that explains “How To Read The DISC Graphs” and “Understanding The Two Graphs.”

77 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 76 “D” Type Behavior Active / Task-Oriented Task-Oriented Dominant Direct Decisive Demanding Dominant Direct Decisive Demanding

78 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 77 “I” Type Behavior Active / People-Oriented People-Oriented Inspiring Influencing Inducing Impressive Inspiring Influencing Inducing Impressive

79 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 78 “S” Type Behavior Passive / People -Oriented Passive / People -Oriented Submissive Steady Sensitive Shy Submissive Steady Sensitive Shy “ S u c k e r ”

80 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 79 “C” Type Behavior Passive / Task-Oriented Task-Oriented Competent Compliant Cautious Correct Competent Compliant Cautious Correct

81 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 80

82 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 81 What do you think? Which of the four types, D, I, S, & C is most like you in Graph 1? What do you think? Which of the four types, D, I, S, & C is most like you in Graph 1?

83 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 82 What do you think? Which of the four types, D. I, S, & C is most like you in Graph 2? What do you think? Which of the four types, D. I, S, & C is most like you in Graph 2?

84 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 83 What do you think? Describe in your own words your overall “D” type behavior? What do you think? Describe in your own words your overall “D” type behavior?

85 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 84 What do you think? Describe in your own words your overall “I” type behavior? What do you think? Describe in your own words your overall “I” type behavior?

86 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 85 What do you think? Describe in your own words your overall “S” type behavior? What do you think? Describe in your own words your overall “S” type behavior?

87 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 86 What do you think? Describe in your own words your overall “C” type behavior? What do you think? Describe in your own words your overall “C” type behavior?

88 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 87 How has understanding the different temperaments help?

89 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D Two DISC Graphs "M" Graph 1 "M" Graph 1 "L" Graph 2 "L" Graph 2 "This is expected of me" "This is me" D I S C

90 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 89 DI C S Each graph describes a personality in a different way. Look at each graph and find the highest plotting point. Notice in Example A, the highest point is "C." The next highest point is "S." This profile is a "C/S" type personality. "C/S"s are cautious and steady. They like to do one thing at a time and do it right the first time. They also like stable and secure-oriented surroundings. They don't like to take risks or cause trouble. "C/S"s need to be more outgoing and positive. Their Behavioral Blend is "Competent Specialist." Notice in Example A, the highest point is "C." The next highest point is "S." This profile is a "C/S" type personality. "C/S"s are cautious and steady. They like to do one thing at a time and do it right the first time. They also like stable and secure-oriented surroundings. They don't like to take risks or cause trouble. "C/S"s need to be more outgoing and positive. Their Behavioral Blend is "Competent Specialist." Example A How To Read The DISC Graphs

91 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D Two DISC Graphs "M" Graph 1 "M" Graph 1 "L" Graph 2 "L" Graph 2 "This is expected of me" "This is me" D I S C

92 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D Two DISC Graphs "M" Graph 1 "M" Graph 1 "L" Graph 2 "L" Graph 2 "This is expected of me" "This is me" D I S C

93 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D Two DISC Graphs "M" Graph 1 "M" Graph 1 "L" Graph 2 "L" Graph 2 "This is expected of me" "This is me" D I S C

94 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D Two DISC Graphs "M" Graph 1 "M" Graph 1 "L" Graph 2 "L" Graph 2 "This is expected of me" "This is me" D I S C

95 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D Two DISC Graphs "M" Graph 1 "M" Graph 1 "L" Graph 2 "L" Graph 2 "This is expected of me" "This is me" D I S C

96 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D Two DISC Graphs "M" Graph 1 "M" Graph 1 "L" Graph 2 "L" Graph 2 "This is expected of me" "This is me" D I S C

97 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D Two DISC Graphs "M" Graph 1 "M" Graph 1 "L" Graph 2 "L" Graph 2 "This is expected of me" "This is me" D I S C

98 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 97 BIBLICAL EXAMPLES OF PERSONALITY TYPES BIBLICAL EXAMPLES OF PERSONALITY TYPES Mary and Martha are good examples of opposite types. Martha was more active and task-oriented, while her sister, Mary, was more passive and people-oriented. Martha demonstrated "D" type behavior while Mary showed "S" behavior (John 11:20).

99 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 98 BIBLICAL EXAMPLES OF PERSONALITY TYPES BIBLICAL EXAMPLES OF PERSONALITY TYPES What do you think? Give another example of someone you know of who might be an example of a “D” type? What do you think? Give another example of someone you know of who might be an example of a “D” type?

100 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 99 The Apostle Paul was definitely a "D" type. He was left for dead, imprisoned, stoned, forsaken and forgotten, yet he pressed on toward the high calling of God. BIBLICAL EXAMPLES OF PERSONALITY TYPES BIBLICAL EXAMPLES OF PERSONALITY TYPES

101 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 100 Sarah exhibited “D” behavior. She grew tired of waiting for God to give her the child He promised. So she “dominated” and devised her own way. She ordered Hagar to have a child. Sarah then raised it as her own. BIBLICAL EXAMPLES OF PERSONALITY TYPES BIBLICAL EXAMPLES OF PERSONALITY TYPES

102 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 101 Peter demonstrated "I" type behavior when he often spoke-up for the disciples. He was also very dramatic. One moment Peter promises, in front of a crowd, to never forsake Christ, then a little later he denies the Lord. Yet God used Peter in a great way at Pentecost. BIBLICAL EXAMPLES OF PERSONALITY TYPES BIBLICAL EXAMPLES OF PERSONALITY TYPES

103 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 102 Ruth showed “I” behavior when she enticed Naomi to let her travel with her. Ruth demonstrated family loyalty and an adventurous spirit by her willingness to move to a foreign country. BIBLICAL EXAMPLES OF PERSONALITY TYPES BIBLICAL EXAMPLES OF PERSONALITY TYPES

104 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 103 Moses seemed to show "S" behavior when God told him to lead the children of Israel out of Egypt. Moses was unsure of himself. He even tried to get Aaron to be the leader. BIBLICAL EXAMPLES OF PERSONALITY TYPES BIBLICAL EXAMPLES OF PERSONALITY TYPES

105 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 104 Hannah is a good example of “S” behavior. She was submissive and remained faithful, even though her dreams were not fulfilled. She may have appeared “unstable” when she prayed in the temple. Her reaction after praying shows she was very stable. BIBLICAL EXAMPLES OF PERSONALITY TYPES BIBLICAL EXAMPLES OF PERSONALITY TYPES

106 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 105 Thomas, the Disciple, exhibited "C" behavior when he doubted Christ's resurrection. Jesus didn't belittle Thomas, but gave him the evidence needed to serve the Lord in a great way. BIBLICAL EXAMPLES OF PERSONALITY TYPES BIBLICAL EXAMPLES OF PERSONALITY TYPES

107 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 106 Esther seems to be a good example of “C” behavior. As the Queen, she was willing to comply with the rules and requirements of her position. Yet, when it became necessary to “bend” those rules, she wanted to make sure that it was done correctly.

108 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 107 What do you think? Give another example of someone you know of who might be an example of “C” behavior? What do you think? Give another example of someone you know of who might be an example of “C” behavior?

109 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 108 Study the Interpretation page in relation to your highest plotting points on your two graphs. Which is your “DISC” personality type (which plotting point/s is/are above the mid-line) in both graphs?

110 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 109 Review Take a moment to read through your favorite Bible passage. Can you spot specific DISC behavior with which you might relate?

111 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 110 What is your “DISC” personality type (which plotting point/s is/are above the mid-line) in both graphs? Graph 1 ? Graph 2?

112 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 111 What stands out about your personality type?

113 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 112 What are the differences in your two graphs, if any in your two graphs?

114 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 113 What are your Behavioral Blend/s in Graph 1 & 2?

115 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 114 More Review Study the Interpretation page in relations to your highest plotting points on your two graphs?

116 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 115 What is your favorite Scripture reference? How does that reference relate to your Behavioral Blend?

117 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 116 With your Behavioral Blend in mind, what stand out in your Behavioral Blend description?

118 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 117 What do you think? Which Scriptures challenge you the most and why?

119 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 118 DISCOVERING YOUR BEHAVIORAL BLEND D: DETERMINED DOERS D I S C "D"s are dominant and demanding. "D"s are dominant and demanding. They win at all costs. They win at all costs. They do not care as much about what people They do not care as much about what people think as they care about getting the job done. think as they care about getting the job done. Their insensitivity to feelings makes them too strong. Their insensitivity to feelings makes them too strong. They are great at developing things, but they need to improve their ability to do things correctly. They are great at developing things, but they need to improve their ability to do things correctly. Their strong will should be disciplined to prepare and think more accurately about what they are doing. Their strong will should be disciplined to prepare and think more accurately about what they are doing. They are motivated by serious challenges to accomplish tasks. They are motivated by serious challenges to accomplish tasks.

120 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 119 What did you learn from your Behavioral Blend ? What did you learn from your Behavioral Blend ?

121 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 120 What do you think? Why does God give some people spiritual gifts that seem not to match their personality type? What do you think? Why does God give some people spiritual gifts that seem not to match their personality type?

122 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 121 Combination Personality and Spiritual Gift T ake it — Or leave it! Heaven — Or Hell, the choice is yours! No challenge is too big!" Commando For Christ" Enjoys "Confrontational Evangelism" "I" Type Personality With The Gift of Evangelism Christ has come to give you LIFE Christ has come to give you LIFE abundantly!T rust Christ and you'll be a better athlete, businessperson, etc. "Cheerleaders For Christ" "C" Type Personality With The Gift of Evangelism Come now and let us reason together! Ready always to give an answer! Process and structured approach. "W alking Encyclopedias For Christ" Prefers "One-on-one discussion / debate" "S" Type Personality With The Gift of Evangelism Christ is a friend who sticks closer than a brother! He will never leave you or forsake you! "Martyr For Christ" Desires "Friendship / Relationship Evangelism" Not confrontation! "D" Type Personality With The Gift of Evangelism

123 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 122 What do you think? How well does your combination personality and Spiritual Gifts describe you? What do you think? How well does your combination personality and Spiritual Gifts describe you?

124 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 123 What do you think? What other combinations seem to be contradictory? What do you think? What other combinations seem to be contradictory?

125 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 124 What are the advantages and disadvantages to having similar and different kinds of motivations ?

126 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 125 Be careful to not offend when you take charge— "The servant of the Lord must not strive (be pushy), but be gentle," 2 Tim. 2:24. Be careful to not offend when you take charge— "The servant of the Lord must not strive (be pushy), but be gentle," 2 Tim. 2:24. Anger is normal, but must be controlled— "Be angry and sin not," Eph. 4:26. Anger is normal, but must be controlled— "Be angry and sin not," Eph. 4:26. Be motivated to purity and peace— "Wisdom from above is first pure, peaceable...," James 3:17. Be motivated to purity and peace— "Wisdom from above is first pure, peaceable...," James 3:17. Focus on doing ONE thing well—"This ONE thing I do," Phil. 3:13. Focus on doing ONE thing well—"This ONE thing I do," Phil. 3:13. Always remember, God is the Master of your fate— "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom," Prov. 1:7. Always remember, God is the Master of your fate— "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom," Prov. 1:7. CONTROLLING YOUR BEHAVIORAL BLEND D: DETERMINED DOERS

127 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 126 What did you learn from studying your Behavioral Blend ?

128 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 127 What do you think? Why does God give some people spiritual gifts that seem not to match their personality type ? What do you think? Why does God give some people spiritual gifts that seem not to match their personality type ?

129 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 128 What do you think? How well does your combination personality and Spiritual Gifts describe you ? What do you think? How well does your combination personality and Spiritual Gifts describe you ?

130 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 129 Combination Personality and Spiritual Gift Take it — Or leave it! Heaven — Or Hell, the choice is yours! Take it — Or leave it! Heaven — Or Hell, the choice is yours! No challenge is too big!” No challenge is too big!” Commando For Christ" Commando For Christ" Enjoys "Confrontational Evangelism" Enjoys "Confrontational Evangelism" "D" Type Personality With The Gift of Evangelism

131 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 130 Combination Personality and Spiritual Gift "I" Type Personality With The Gift of Evangelism Christ has come to give you LIFE abundantly! Christ has come to give you LIFE abundantly! Trust Christ and you'll be a better athlete, businessperson, etc. Trust Christ and you'll be a better athlete, businessperson, etc. "Cheerleaders For Christ" "Cheerleaders For Christ"

132 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 131 Combination Personality and Spiritual Gift "S" Type Personality With The Gift of Evangelism Christ is a friend who sticks closer than a brother! Christ is a friend who sticks closer than a brother! He will never leave you or forsake you! He will never leave you or forsake you! "Martyr For Christ" "Martyr For Christ" Desires "Friendship / Relationship Evangelism” Not confrontation! Desires "Friendship / Relationship Evangelism” Not confrontation!

133 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 132 Combination Personality and Spiritual Gift "C" Type Personality With The Gift of Evangelism Come now and let us reason together! Come now and let us reason together! Ready always to give an answer! Ready always to give an answer! Process and structured approach. Process and structured approach. Walking Encyclopedias For Christ" Walking Encyclopedias For Christ" Prefers "One-on-one discussion / debate" Prefers "One-on-one discussion / debate"

134 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 133 What do you think? How well does your combination personality and Spiritual Gifts describe you?

135 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 134 What do you think? What other combinations seem to be contradictory?

136 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 135 What are the advantages and disadvantages to having similar and different kinds of motivations?

137 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 136 Search The Scriptures— Joshua 1:8 This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate in it day and night, that you may observe to do according to all that is written in it. For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have good success.

138 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 137 What do you think? How do you think God can use your combination giftedness?

139 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 138 What do you think? Why should every member be involved in a ministry of the church?

140 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 139 Search The Scriptures — Hebrews 5:12 - 6:1 How would you describe maturity in Christ?

141 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 140 "D" BEHAVIOR Reward: Follow your spiritual leaders. Allow Christ to be the Lord of your life, and God will use you in a great way to move the ministry forward. Warning: You want to control everyone, but must first control yourself. Remember "to have authority, you must be under authority.” Be loyal to your leaders. Opportunities: Organize needed ministry, chair Stewardship Committee, head Usher's Committee, commit to specific challenge. Abilities: Lead, take stand, confront issue, persevere, dictate, make decisions and control. Prayer: “Dear God, control my driving, demanding and dominant personality, so I can be a strong and peace-making leader for your glory.” Involvement / Personality Perspective

142 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 141 Band Big Brothers Bowling Choir Coaching College/Career Communicatn. Concerts Counseling Deacons Discipleship Drama Altar Counsel. Baptism Benevolence Bereaving Big Brothers Book Store Bowling Carpentry Children Child Care Cleaning Clerical College/Career Communion Concerts Counseling Deacons Decorating Discipleship "I" Types — Elders Elementary Encouragemt. Evangelism Follow-up Foods Grounds Hispanic Min. Hospital Hospice HousingVisitors Infant/Toddlers Interpreting Interc. Prayer Kid's KampVBS Kitchen Library Mailings Maintenance EMT Evangelism Finances Media Men's Min. Missions Carpentry Coaching Construction Deacons Discipleship Elders "D" Types — Tutor Trustee Vehicles Video Visitors Cards Weddings Worship Writing Yard Work Preschool Printing Publicity Records Scrip. Reader Search Com. Secretarial Security Serving Meals Set-up Sound System Supplies Steering Com. Tape Ministry Teaching Transportation Long Rng. Pln. Maintenance Meals Missions Music Newsletter Nurse Nursery Office Machin. Orchestra Organ Personnel Photography Physician Piano Prayer Drama Elders Electrical EMT Evangelism Finances Follow-up Food Floral Arrange. Graphic Arts Grounds Infants/Toddl. Interpreting Kitchen Library Mailings Accounting Band Benevolence Book Store Carpentry Children Cleaning Clerical Communion Computer Concerts Construction Curriculum Deacons Decorating Discipleship "C" Types — "S" Types — "Choose You This Day Who and Where You Will Serve" Meals Missions Newcomers New Members Newsletter Nurse Nursery Office Machine Orchestra Organ Physician Piano Preschool Printing Records Receptionist Refuge/Hmless. Scripture Read. Search Com. Secretary Senior Adults Serving Meals Set-up Shut-ins Single Adults Small Groups Sound System Summer Camp Supper Club Supplies Support Groups Tape Ministry Teaching Telephone Call. Tutor Transportation Trustees Ushers Vehicles Visitation Visitors Cards Weddings Women's Min. Worship Writing Yard Work Youth Choir Elders Elementary Evangelism Encouragemt. Greeters Graphic Arts High School Hispanic Min. Housing Visitors Jr. High Interpreting Kid Kmp/VBS Scripture Read. Receptionist Recreation Secretary Senior Adults Single Adults Song Leading Summer Camp Supper Club Support Group Song Leader Teacher TelephoneCall. Trustee Usher Video Visitation Women's Min. Worship Youth Youth Choir Security Steering Com. Teaching Trustees Ushers Vehicles Long Rng Pln. Personnel Publicity Prayer Recreation Search Comm. Worship Yard Work Media Men's Min. Missions Music Newcomers New Mem. Orchestra Organ Photography Piano Prayer Publicity

143 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 142 "Choose You This Day Who and Where You Will Serve" Men's Min. Missions Long Rng Pln. Personnel Publicity Elders EMT Evangelism Finances Media Carpentry Coaching Construction Deacons Discipleship "D" Types — Prayer Recreation Search Comm. Security Steering Com. Teaching Trustees Ushers Vehicles Worship Yard Work Youth Ministry

144 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 143 "Choose You This Day Who and Where You Will Serve" “I” Types — Interpreting Kid Kmp/VBS Media Men's Min. Missions Music Newcomers New Mem. Orchestra Organ Photography Drama Elders Elementary Evangelism Encouragemt. Greeters Graphic Arts High School Hispanic Min. Housing Visitr. Jr. High Band Big Brothers Bowling Choir Coaching College/Career Communicatn. Concerts Counseling Deacons Discipleship Piano Prayer Publicity Script. Read. Receptionist Recreation Secretary Senior Adults Single Adults Song Leader Summer Camp Supper Club Support Group Teacher Telephone Call. Trustee Usher Video Visitation Women's Min. Worship Youth Youth Choir

145 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 144 "Choose You This Day Who and Where You Will Serve" “S” Types — Altar Counselr. Baptism Benevolence Bereaving Big Brothers Book Store Bowling Carpentry Children Child Care Cleaning Clerical College/Career Communion Concerts Counseling Deacons Preschool Printing Records Receptionist Refug/Hmless. Scripture Read. Search Com. Secretary Senior Adults Serving Meals Set-up Shut-ins Single Adults Small Groups Sound System Summer Camp Supper Club Kid Kamp/VBS Kitchen Library Mailings Maintenance Meals Missions Newcomers New Mem. Newsletter Nurse Nursery Office Machn. Orchestra Organ Physician Piano Decorating Discipleship Elders Elementary Encouragemt. Evangelism Follow-up Foods Grounds Hispanic Min. Hospital Hospice Housing Visitors Infant/Todd. Interpreting Interc. Pray. Supplies Support Groups Tape Ministry Teaching Telephone Call. Tutor Transportation Trustees Ushers Vehicles Visitation Visitors Cards Weddings Women's Min. Worship Writing Yard Work Youth Choir

146 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 145 "Choose You This Day Who and Where You Will Serve" “C” Types — Steering Com. Tape Ministry Teaching Transportation Tutor Trustee Vehicles Video Visitors Cards Weddings Worship Writing Yard Work Physician Piano Prayer Preschool Printing Publicity Records Scrip. Reader Search Com. Secretarial Security Serving Meals Set-up Sound System Supplies Library Mailings Long Rng. Pln. Maintenance Meals Missions Music Newsletter Nurse Nursery Office Machin. Orchestra Organ Personnel Photography Discipleship Drama Elders Electrical EMT Evangelism Finances Follow-up Food Floral Arrang Graphic Arts Grounds Infants Todd. Interpreting Kitchen Accounting Band Benevolence Book Store Carpentry Children Cleaning Clerical Communion Computer Concerts Construction Curriculum Deacons Decorating

147 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 146 Fitly Joined Together Altar Counsel. Adult Choir Band Big Brothers Choir Coaching College/Career Communication Concerts Counseling Deacons Discipleship Drama Elders Encouragement Evangelism High School Jr. High Media Men's Ministry Newsletter Nurse Prayer Printing Receptionist Script. Reader Single Parents Tape Ministry Teaching Trustees Video Visitation Women's Min. Worship Writing Fitly Joined Together Encouraging / Exhorting

148 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 147 Kitchen Meals Newcomers Nurse Nursery Organ Physician Piano Prayer Preschool Refug./Homeless Serving Meals Set-up Shut-ins Telephone Call. Tutoring Trustees Weddings Women's Min. Worship Writing Yard Work Bereaving Big Brothers Carpentry Child Care Children Cleaning Communion Construction Counseling Deacons Discipleship Elders Elementary EMT Evangelism Foods Greeters Housing Visit. Hospital Hospice Infants/Toddler Interpreting Intercess. Prayer Kids Kamp / VBS Fitly Joined Together Showing Mercy

149 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 148 Vehicles Video Visitation Visitors Cards Weddings Women’s Min. Worship Writing Yard Work Youth Youth Choir Single Parents Small Groups Song Leader Sound System Steering Comm. Supplies Supper Club Tape Ministry Teaching Telephone Call. Tutoring Transportation Trustees Ushers EMT Encouragement Evangelism Floral Arrange. Foods Graphic Arts Greeters Grounds Hispanic Min. High School Housing Visitor Hospital Hospitality Hospice Infants/Toddlers Interpreting Intercess. Prayer Jr. High Kids Camp/VBS Kitchen Library Mailings Maintenance Martial Arts Meals Media Men Ministry Missions Musician Newcomers Newsletter Nurse Nursery Office Machines Orchestra Organ Personnel Photography Physician Piano Prayer Preschool Printing Publicity Records Receptionist Recreation Script. Reader Secretarial Senior Adults Serving Meals Set-up Shut-ins Single Adults Adult Choir Altar Counselor Band Baptism Bereaving Big Brothers Bookstore Bowling Carpentry Child Care Children Choir Cleaning Clerical Coaching College / Career Communion Concerts Construction Counseling Decorating Deacons Discipleship Drama Elders Electrical Elementary Fitly Joined Together Serving / Ministry

150 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 149 Bookstore Clerical Coaching Computer Curriculum Deacons Discipleship Elders Electrical Elementary Finances Interpreting Library Mens Ministry Missions Prayer Printing Records Script. Reader Search Comm. Steering Comm. Tape Ministry Teaching Tutoring Trustees Video Women’s Min. Worship Writing Fitly Joined Together Teaching

151 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 150 What do you think? When and how are you happiest in the church? What do you think? When and how are you happiest in the church?

152 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 151 Search The Scriptures — Ex. 4:10-15 What lesson did God want Moses to learn? And Moses said unto the, O my, I am not eloquent, neither heretofore, nor since thou hast spoken unto thy servant: but I am slow of speech, and of a slow tongue. And the said unto him, Who hath made man's mouth? or who maketh the dumb, or deaf, or the seeing, or the blind? have not I the ? Now therefore go, and I will be with thy mouth, and teach thee what thou shalt say. And he said, O my, send, I pray thee, by the hand of him whom thou wilt send. And the anger of the was kindled against Moses, and he said, Is not Aaron the Levite thy brother? I know that he can speak well. And also, behold, he cometh forth to meet thee: and when he seeth thee, he will be glad in his heart. And thou shalt speak unto him, and put words in his mouth: and I will be with thy mouth, and with his mouth, and will teach you what ye shall do. And he shall be thy spokesman unto the people: and he shall be, even he shall be to thee instead of a mouth, and thou shalt be to him instead of God. And Moses said unto the L ORD, O my L ORD, I am not eloquent, neither heretofore, nor since thou hast spoken unto thy servant: but I am slow of speech, and of a slow tongue. And the L ORD said unto him, Who hath made man's mouth? or who maketh the dumb, or deaf, or the seeing, or the blind? have not I the L ORD ? Now therefore go, and I will be with thy mouth, and teach thee what thou shalt say. And he said, O my L ORD, send, I pray thee, by the hand of him whom thou wilt send. And the anger of the L ORD was kindled against Moses, and he said, Is not Aaron the Levite thy brother? I know that he can speak well. And also, behold, he cometh forth to meet thee: and when he seeth thee, he will be glad in his heart. And thou shalt speak unto him, and put words in his mouth: and I will be with thy mouth, and with his mouth, and will teach you what ye shall do. And he shall be thy spokesman unto the people: and he shall be, even he shall be to thee instead of a mouth, and thou shalt be to him instead of God.

153 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 152 Search The Scriptures — Hebrews 10:23-25 What can we learn from this passage? Let us hold fast the profession of our faith without wavering; (for he is faithful that promised;) Let us hold fast the profession of our faith without wavering; (for he is faithful that promised;) And let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works: And let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works: Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching. Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching.

154 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 153 What do you think? How have some Christians been frustrated by certain ministries? What do you think? How have some Christians been frustrated by certain ministries?

155 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 154

156 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 155 Choose you this day Who and where you will serve?

157 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 156 In what ministries are you gifted to serve?

158 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 157 What do you think? How can your giftedness help these ministries?

159 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 158 What can we learn from this passage? Deut. 30:19 “ I call heaven and earth to record this day against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing: therefore choose life, that both thou and thy seed may live” What can we learn from this passage? Deut. 30:19 “ I call heaven and earth to record this day against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing: therefore choose life, that both thou and thy seed may live”

160 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 159 Joy in Ministry God gifted you to glorify Himself. He also blesses you for honoring Him. Joy in Ministry God gifted you to glorify Himself. He also blesses you for honoring Him.

161 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D ___ Musician 75. ___ Newcomers 76. ___ New Members 77. ___ Newsletter 78. ___ Nurse 79. ___ Nursery 80. ___ Office Mach. 81. ___ Orchestra 82. ___ Organ 83. ___ Personnel 84. ___ Photography 85. ___ Physician 86. ___ Piano 87. ___ Prayer Preschool Preschool 88. ___ Sunday 88. ___ Sunday 111. ___ Summer Camp 112. ___ Supplies 113. ___ Supper Club 114. ___ Support Groups 115. ___ Tape Ministry 116. ___ Teaching 117. ___ Telephone Call ___ Tutoring 119. ___ Transportation 120. ___ Trustees 121. ___ Ushers 122. ___ Vehicles 123. ___ Video 124. ___ Visitation 125. ___ Visitor Cards 126. ___ Weddings Place an "E " next to each area you have experience. Place an "I " in the areas you find interesting. Place an "H " in the areas that are your heart’s passions. Opportunities For Ministry 1. ___ Accounting 2. ___ Adult Choir 3. ___ Altar Counselor 4. ___ Band 5. ___ Baptism 6. ___ Benevolence 7. ___ Bereaving 8. ___ Big Brothers 9. ___ Bookstore 10. ___ Bowling 11. ___ Carpentry 12. ___ Child Care 13. ___ Children 14. ___ Choir 15. ___ Cleaning 16. ___ Clerical 39. ___ Floral Arrang. 40. ___ Follow-up 41. ___ Foods 42. ___ Graphic Arts 43. ___ Greeters 44. ___ Grounds 45. ___ Hispanic Min. High School High School 46. ___ Sunday 46. ___ Sunday 47. ___ Mid-week 47. ___ Mid-week 48. ___ Special Evts. 48. ___ Special Evts. 49. ___ Housing Visitor 50. ___ Hospitals 51. ___ Hospitality 52. ___ Hospice Infants / Toddlers Infants / Toddlers E E E H I H

162 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 161 What do you think? How do conflicts affect churches? What do you think? How do conflicts affect churches?

163 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 162 What do you thin k? How would your giftedness been affected on the Day of Pentecost? What do you thin k? How would your giftedness been affected on the Day of Pentecost?

164 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 163 God's specific will is that every Christian honor and serve Him! We glorify God best when we allow Him to use our giftedness in ministry. God's specific will is that every Christian honor and serve Him! We glorify God best when we allow Him to use our giftedness in ministry. Joy In Ministry

165 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 164 Joy In Ministry "If any man serve me, him will my Father honor," John 12:26.

166 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 165 "D" Leaders — Leadership Styles Take control Take control Seek power and authority Seek power and authority Don't like being told what to do Don't like being told what to do Can be too pushy and forceful Can be too pushy and forceful Are hard workers Are hard workers Accomplish difficult tasks Accomplish difficult tasks Are direct and decisive Are direct and decisive Need to control their demanding ways Need to control their demanding ways Need to slow down and be gentle Need to slow down and be gentle Need to be more sensitive to others Need to be more sensitive to others

167 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 166 Leadership Styles "I" Leaders — Are inspiring and enthusiastic Are inspiring and enthusiastic Love to be up-front and influence Love to be up-front and influence Are persuasive and articulate Are persuasive and articulate Talk too much Talk too much Need to listen more Need to listen more Need to not be so sensitive to rejection Need to not be so sensitive to rejection Are impressive and positive Are impressive and positive Love crowds and seek attention Love crowds and seek attention Need to be interested in individuals Need to be interested in individuals Often proud and self-center Often proud and self-center

168 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 167 Leadership Styles Are more kind and nicer Are more kind and nicer Seldom demanding Seldom demanding Friendly and loyal Friendly and loyal Need to be more aggressive Need to be more aggressive Need to be more assertive Need to be more assertive Overly sensitive to their shortcomings Overly sensitive to their shortcomings Need to be more confident Need to be more confident Dislike taking risks Dislike taking risks Are reliable, relaxed and reserved Are reliable, relaxed and reserved Submissive and security-oriented Submissive and security-oriented "S" Leaders —

169 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 168 Leadership Styles Are competent and compliant Are competent and compliant Go by the book Go by the book Want to do everything just right Want to do everything just right Are thorough and detailed-oriented Are thorough and detailed-oriented Often informative and opinionated Often informative and opinionated Need to be more positive Need to be more positive Need to be more enthusiastic Need to be more enthusiastic Answer questions people aren't asking Answer questions people aren't asking Extremely influential Extremely influential Need to see solutions, not problems Need to see solutions, not problems "C" Leaders —

170 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 169 Leadership Styles “D” Followers — "D"s respect strong leaders. "D"s respect strong leaders. They want to be part of a winning team. They want to be part of a winning team. They follow with power and authority in mind. They wonder, "Will this action make me more respected and / or get the job done?" They follow with power and authority in mind. They wonder, "Will this action make me more respected and / or get the job done?" "D" followers need choices, rather than "get-in or get-out" ultimatums. "D" followers need choices, rather than "get-in or get-out" ultimatums. They need opportunities to do their own thing. They need opportunities to do their own thing. "D"s respect strong leaders. "D"s respect strong leaders. They want to be part of a winning team. They want to be part of a winning team. They follow with power and authority in mind. They wonder, "Will this action make me more respected and / or get the job done?" They follow with power and authority in mind. They wonder, "Will this action make me more respected and / or get the job done?" "D" followers need choices, rather than "get-in or get-out" ultimatums. "D" followers need choices, rather than "get-in or get-out" ultimatums. They need opportunities to do their own thing. They need opportunities to do their own thing.

171 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 170 Leadership Styles “I” Followers — "I"s follow with their hearts. "I"s follow with their hearts. They tend to be impulsive followers. They tend to be impulsive followers. They want opportunities that will make them look good. They want opportunities that will make them look good. "I" followers talk a lot. They make great first impressions. "I" followers talk a lot. They make great first impressions. Their high egos and ability to persuade often turn them into the leaders in order to rise to the top. Their high egos and ability to persuade often turn them into the leaders in order to rise to the top. Sometimes you don't know who's leading whom. Sometimes you don't know who's leading whom. "I"s follow with their hearts. "I"s follow with their hearts. They tend to be impulsive followers. They tend to be impulsive followers. They want opportunities that will make them look good. They want opportunities that will make them look good. "I" followers talk a lot. They make great first impressions. "I" followers talk a lot. They make great first impressions. Their high egos and ability to persuade often turn them into the leaders in order to rise to the top. Their high egos and ability to persuade often turn them into the leaders in order to rise to the top. Sometimes you don't know who's leading whom. Sometimes you don't know who's leading whom.

172 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 171 Leadership Styles “S” Followers — "S" followers don't make quick decisions. They like leaders who are understanding and gentle. They want to establish a relationship with a leader who will be around for a long time. "S"s are concerned about service and stability. When it comes to sensible and slow judgment, "S" followers feel right at home. They like familiar and low-key environments. "S" followers don't make quick decisions. They like leaders who are understanding and gentle. They want to establish a relationship with a leader who will be around for a long time. "S"s are concerned about service and stability. When it comes to sensible and slow judgment, "S" followers feel right at home. They like familiar and low-key environments.

173 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 172 Leadership Styles “C” Followers — "C"s are "Consumer Report" type followers. They analyze each decision. They love research and development. "C"s are quality oriented followers. They don't like quick or costly decisions. Picky and precise, they follow with their minds, rather than hearts. "C"s seldom respond positively at first. They often want time to think about their decisions. Once convinced, they follow best. "C"s are "Consumer Report" type followers. They analyze each decision. They love research and development. "C"s are quality oriented followers. They don't like quick or costly decisions. Picky and precise, they follow with their minds, rather than hearts. "C"s seldom respond positively at first. They often want time to think about their decisions. Once convinced, they follow best.

174 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 173 Most of the problems in the church today are not theological, they are relational — personality clashes among members!

175 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 174 How To Handle Conflicts "D" Behavior — Under Pressure: Becomes dictatorial, domineering, demanding, angry, intense, forceful, direct, bossy. Sources of Irritation: Weakness, indecisiveness, laziness Lack of — discipline, plan, purpose, direction, authority, control, challenge. Needs To: Back off, seek peace, relax, think before reacting, control self, be — patient, loving friendly, loyal, kind, sensitive.

176 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 175 How To Handle Conflicts "I" Behavior — Under Pressure: Becomes hyper, overly optimistic, immature, emotional, irrational, silly, wordy, selfish. Sources of Irritation: Disinterest, slowness, pessimism, details, time restraints, antagonism, doubt, structure, lack of — enthusiasm, team participation. Needs To: Listen, count the cost, control emotions, be — humble, strong, disciplined, punctual, careful with words, conscientious.

177 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 176 How To Handle Conflicts "S" Behavior — Under Pressure: Becomes subservient, insecure, fearful, weak-willed, withdrawn, sympathizer, sucker. Sources of Irritation: Pushiness, instability, inflexibility, anger, disloyalty, insensitivity, pride, discrimination, unfairness. Needs To: Be — strong, courageous, challenging, aggressive, assertive, confrontational, enthusiastic, outgoing, expressive, cautious, bold.

178 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 177 How To Handle Conflicts "C" Behavior — Under Pressure: Becomes moody, critical, contemplative, negative, worrisome. Sources of Irritation: Incompetence, disorganization, foolishness, dishonesty, inaccuracy, wastefulness, inconsistency, blind faith, false impressions. Needs To: Loosen up, communicate, be — joyful, positive, tolerant, compromising, open, trusting, enthusiastic.

179 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 178 Search The Scriptures — Job 14:1 “Man who is born of woman will have troubles!” Why do you think everyone has trials and troubles in life? trials and troubles in life? Search The Scriptures — Job 14:1 “Man who is born of woman will have troubles!” Why do you think everyone has trials and troubles in life? trials and troubles in life?

180 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. What do you think? How do you respond under pressure? What do you think? How do you respond under pressure?

181 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. What do you think? What are your specific sources of irritation? What do you think? What are your specific sources of irritation?

182 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 181 What do you think? What do you need to do with your specific personality type in mind when in conflict? What do you think? What do you need to do with your specific personality type in mind when in conflict?

183 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 182 Covenant — Follow the Principle of Priorities. Follow the Principle of Priorities. Glorify God, build harmony in the church and avoid conflicts. Glorify God, build harmony in the church and avoid conflicts. Do as Matthew 18 admonishes—go to an offending brother "first alone." Do as Matthew 18 admonishes—go to an offending brother "first alone." Biblical Resolution Management

184 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 183 First Step — I will not first share the offense with another person. I will not first share the offense with another person. I am committed to restoring the relationship, rather than exposing possible sin I am committed to restoring the relationship, rather than exposing possible sin I recognize most problems with people are personality clashes. I recognize most problems with people are personality clashes. I will try to understand their actions based upon their perspective. I will try to understand their actions based upon their perspective. Biblical Resolution Management

185 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 184 Why is this first step absolutely vital?

186 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 185 Second Step — Seek a neutral and mature individual who will listen to each of our perspectives. This person will hopefully be able to shed light on one or both of our blind spots or areas of needed growth in order to glorify God. Recognize that the "witness" may reveal or say things I won't like. Believe God is using him or her to resolve the conflict, rather than take sides. (The "witness" must be an individual with deep spiritual wisdom and highly respected by everyone involved.) Second Step — Seek a neutral and mature individual who will listen to each of our perspectives. This person will hopefully be able to shed light on one or both of our blind spots or areas of needed growth in order to glorify God. Recognize that the "witness" may reveal or say things I won't like. Believe God is using him or her to resolve the conflict, rather than take sides. (The "witness" must be an individual with deep spiritual wisdom and highly respected by everyone involved.) Biblical Resolution Management

187 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 186 Warning — Don't seek to find others who have also been offended. Don't share concerns with potential "witnesses" prior to the meeting. The purpose of having a "witness" is not to validate hurts, but rather open hearts and minds to the possible needs regarding our relationships with others. Realize friends may naturally listen to concerns, but also take up offense. Whenever I feel an urge to share the offense with my friends, I will pray and commune with God about my hurt. Warning — Don't seek to find others who have also been offended. Don't share concerns with potential "witnesses" prior to the meeting. The purpose of having a "witness" is not to validate hurts, but rather open hearts and minds to the possible needs regarding our relationships with others. Realize friends may naturally listen to concerns, but also take up offense. Whenever I feel an urge to share the offense with my friends, I will pray and commune with God about my hurt. Biblical Resolution Management

188 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 187 Why is this second step and warning absolutely vital?

189 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 188 Confronting Ministry Leaders — I believe in the scriptural admonition to not rebuke an Elder (spiritual leader), other than in grave matters of misconduct and open sin (1 Timothy 5:19). I will earnestly pray for and follow those God has placed in leadership over me. I will not allow anyone to criticize them without following the principles in Matthew 18 and without the specific person present. Confronting Ministry Leaders — I believe in the scriptural admonition to not rebuke an Elder (spiritual leader), other than in grave matters of misconduct and open sin (1 Timothy 5:19). I will earnestly pray for and follow those God has placed in leadership over me. I will not allow anyone to criticize them without following the principles in Matthew 18 and without the specific person present. Biblical Resolution Management

190 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 189 If I have a problem with my ministry leader, I will go "first alone" to them. I will not share my concern with anyone. I will listen and try to understand their perspective of the problem. If I am not satisfied with their explanation and continue to have animosity, I will ask permission and counsel to find a "witness" who may help our conflict. If I have a problem with my ministry leader, I will go "first alone" to them. I will not share my concern with anyone. I will listen and try to understand their perspective of the problem. If I am not satisfied with their explanation and continue to have animosity, I will ask permission and counsel to find a "witness" who may help our conflict. Biblical Resolution Management

191 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 190 If the "witness" finds I have misunderstood the situation and should continue no further, I will trust God to complete His work in my life by casting my burden on the Lord and leaving it there. Biblical Resolution Management

192 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 191 If the "witness" agrees with my concern and finds the ministry leader wrong and the leader refuses to hear the "witness," we will then find a group of two or three other "witnesses" who will hear the matter and determine what God is doing through this conflict. Biblical Resolution Management

193 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 192 Serious Step — If I continue to find fault with a ministry leader and cannot worship in "spirit and truth," I will seek to join another ministry, rather than cause any conflict and disharmony. If I continue to find fault with a ministry leader and cannot worship in "spirit and truth," I will seek to join another ministry, rather than cause any conflict and disharmony. I am committed to pleasing God through resolving my conflicts, even if it means separating myself from the source of my irritations. I am committed to pleasing God through resolving my conflicts, even if it means separating myself from the source of my irritations. Biblical Resolution Management

194 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 193 Ultimate Goal — I commit myself to be spiritual, rather than "normal" and supernatural, rather than "natural" when it comes to solving my problems with others. I commit myself to be spiritual, rather than "normal" and supernatural, rather than "natural" when it comes to solving my problems with others. I want God's will and way to resolve my conflicts and will do as the Holy Bible teaches, regardless of my normal and natural feelings. I want God's will and way to resolve my conflicts and will do as the Holy Bible teaches, regardless of my normal and natural feelings. Biblical Resolution Management

195 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 194 My ultimate goal is to glorify God through bearing much fruit, getting involved in ministry, and avoiding and resolving conflicts. Biblical Resolution Management

196 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 195 Call For Commitment "Present your bodies living sacrifices to God... to discover what is that good and acceptable will of God,” Rom. 12: 1, 2 to discover what is that good and acceptable will of God,” Rom. 12: 1, 2 "Present your bodies living sacrifices to God... to discover what is that good and acceptable will of God,” Rom. 12: 1, 2 to discover what is that good and acceptable will of God,” Rom. 12: 1, 2

197 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 196 What do you think? Why is giving God our giftedness important to discovering the will of God in our lives?

198 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 197 Search The Scriptures — Eph. 4:16 How will discovering and exercising our giftedness help us and our churches? ” From whom the whole body fitly joined together and compacted by that which every joint supplies, according to the effectual working in the measure of every part, makes increase of the body unto the edifying of itself in love.” ” From whom the whole body fitly joined together and compacted by that which every joint supplies, according to the effectual working in the measure of every part, makes increase of the body unto the edifying of itself in love.” Search The Scriptures — Eph. 4:16 How will discovering and exercising our giftedness help us and our churches? ” From whom the whole body fitly joined together and compacted by that which every joint supplies, according to the effectual working in the measure of every part, makes increase of the body unto the edifying of itself in love.” ” From whom the whole body fitly joined together and compacted by that which every joint supplies, according to the effectual working in the measure of every part, makes increase of the body unto the edifying of itself in love.”

199 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 198 Success or Failure “I have set before you life and death, blessings and cursings; therefore choose life, that both you and your seed may live,” Deut. 30:19 Success or Failure “I have set before you life and death, blessings and cursings; therefore choose life, that both you and your seed may live,” Deut. 30:19

200 U niquely Y ou ® © Copyright, 2004 Mels Carbonell, Ph.D. 199 Above all, allow God to use your giftedness for His glory!


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