2 What is Conscious Discipline? A comprehensive social and emotional intelligence classroom management program that empowers BOTH teachers and studentsBased in current brain research/child development and developmentally appropriate practices
3 What is Conscious Discipline? Promotes: permanent behavior changes in both teacher and studentsGoal: provide systematic change in schools- change from traditional compliance model of discipline to a relationship- based community model
4 What is Conscious Discipline? Traditional model looks like:- Rule based- upheld by consequences- in order to obtain obedience- compliance earns rewards- disobedience earns punishment- persistent disobedience means removalTool used in this model: FEARPremises traditional model is based on:- It is possible to control others- Rules govern behaviors- Conflict is a disruption of the learning process
5 What is Conscious Discipline? So why change?!- Brain research indicates fear is detrimental to optimal learning and brain development.- Both teachers AND students are empowered- Before we can change student behaviors, we must first change ourselves
6 What is Conscious Discipline? This program empowers teachers with 7 Powers for Self Control:Power of Perception: No one can make you mad without your permissionPower of Unity: We’re all in it togetherPower of Attention: What you focus on, you get more ofPower of Free Will: The only person you can make change is yourselfPower of Love: See the best in othersPower of Acceptance: The moment is what is itPower of Intention: conflict is an opportunity to teach
7 What is Conscious Discipline? Teaches 7 Basic Skills of DisciplineComposure: become the person you want children to beEncouragement: build school familyAssertiveness: saying “no” and being heardChoice: build self-esteem and willpowerPositive Intent: creating teaching momentsEmpathy: handing the fussing and fitsConsequences: helping students learn from their mistakes
8 What is Conscious Discipline? Creates classroom climate that models 7 Essential Life ValuesIntegrityInterdependenceRespectEmpowermentDiversityCompassionResponsibility
9 What is Conscious Discipline? Teaches Students Basic Social SkillsAnger ManagementHelpfulnessAssertivenessImpulse ControlCooperationEmpathyProblem Solving
10 Becoming Brain Smart Three Brain States Survival State- takes place in the brainstemEmotional State- takes place in the limbic systemExecutive State- takes place in the prefrontal lobes *This is where we want our students to be!*
11 ComposurePrinciple 1: Composure is self control in action. It is a prerequisite skill adults need before disciplining children.- Self Control is: being aware of your own thoughts and feelings- Without Self Control you may be turning your life, and power, over to people, events, and things.For example:- “You make me so mad!”- “Look what you made me do!”- Self-Control must be priority #1“When you lose self-control, you lose the ability to discipline yourself or your children.
12 Composure Out of control adults: Focus on what they don’t want to happen.“STOP!”See things from only their own point of view“You broke the rule!”Would rather punish than teach“Go to the office!”
13 ComposurePrinciple #2: Healthy, secure relationships require that we control our own upsets. No one can make us angry without our permission.- Whomever you have placed in charge of your feelings, you have place in control of you.- Upset is not caused by another person, it is triggered by another person“We see the world not as it is, but through the lens of our judgments about what is desirable.”
14 Composure Triggers Categories: 1. Assumed Intent 2. Magnification 3. LabelingSkill #1: Changing trigger thoughts to calming thoughts.- 2 ways to change:1. Calming self-talk2. Refute the trigger thoughts
15 ComposurePrinciple #3: Start the day the Brain Smart Way and implement stress redirection activities.Starting the Brain Smart Way uses activities to:1. Unite2. Disengage the stress3. Connect students to teacher and each other.4. Commit themselves to learning
16 Composure Brain Smart Start - Unity activities bring everyone together.pledge, song- Disengage the stress activities involve deep breathing and stretching.pretzel, balloon, rollercoaster- Connecting activities pull people together through touch or eye contacthandshakes, waving hello- Commitment/ affirmation activities help tap the power of positive thinkingdaily commitments
17 Composure Skill #2: Reduce Stress 3 Skills of stress reduction are: - being able to relax- being able to focus- being able to breathe
18 Composure Relaxation techniques: - drain - pretzel - balloon - stretchingFocus techniques- saying hello- feeling the heartbeat- body tune upActivities to Breathe- belly breathing- be a STAR
19 ComposurePrinciple #4: Your job is to keep the classroom safe so children can learn. The child’s job is to help keep it safe.“My job is to keep you safe. Your job is to help keep it safe.”- Structure: Safe Place
26 Encouragement Principle #1: We are ALL in this together. Old way of thinking:- one size fits all- change occurs through getting other to comply- students who do not adhere to rules can be removed without damage to the whole“Cooperation, not competition, is the cornerstone of evolution.”“Classrooms an schools need to embrace community…”“Schools must think of themselves school families…”
27 Encouragement School Climate: the mood or feel of the school 4 key factors that lend to the school climatePhysical Environment (looks, smells, feels like…)Social Environment (heath of relationships and interactions)School Routines, Rituals, and Rules (what creates “order”)Expectations (belief about how people learn and change)
29 EncouragementRoutines and Rituals: The heart and soul of school climate- Routines and Rituals are NOT the sameRoutines: establish patterns, add predictability, help regulate, set expectations- Create routines for as many tasks as possible (attendance, lunch count, snack, transitions, lining up, arrival, dismissal, hygiene- tissues, hand washing, using the restroom, etc)- Systematically teach routines- picture representations easy for young students to ‘read’
34 Encouragement Rituals: Have connections as their goal - Most important to creating the school family- produce a calming affectTypes of Rituals:- Greeting- School Family Song- Absent child- New Student/Student moving away- Holdays/birthdays
37 Encouragement School Family Structures Friends and Family Board/Book School Family JobsWays to be Helpful chart/book
38 Encouragement Friends and Family Board/Book Display pictures of children and their familiesHelps students get to know one anotherInclude your own familyClassroom friends (principal, specialists, security, etc)School Family Job BoardEach child holds a jobJobs should be meaningful and helpful to the classroom
40 EncouragementPrinciple #2: Contributing to the welfare of others builds self-worthSkill #1: Meaning Jobs for all (morning message writer, greeter, kindness recorder, visitor greeter, STAR helper, etc)Skill #2: Service jobs for a school community(keeping playground and school clean, cheering on others, etc)
41 Encouragement Skill #3: Noticing children’s contributions to others. Notice strengths- ask students to share their strengths.Avoid ones that describe the strength as being special.Make student strengths publicBasic Formula:“You ________ so _________. That was helpful!”Steps for Noticing-“You….Describe what child didRelate how child’s behavior was helpfulEnd by saying, “That was helpful!”
42 Encouragement Principle #3: How you “see” others defines who you are. The manner in which you perceive others defines who you are.What do you see?Teacher A – “sees” a child off task. Says “What should you be doing?”Teacher B – “sees a child who need helps focusing. Says “What would help you to focus or…”
43 Encouragement Skill #4: The “call for help” perceptual frame. Teachers play a significant role in how children perceive each other and view misbehaviors.We can teach them that:- Inappropriate behavior is bad and needs rejection.- Inappropriate behaviors are a call for helpLabeling a child ‘bad’ – 1 step process- Step 1: deliver perscribed consequenceCall for help – 2 step teaching processStep 1: empower students to respond. *Go to the victim first!*Step 2: Use a “call for help” perceptual face. *Ask what helps the student could use.
44 Encouragement Principle #4: We are all unique, not special. Specialness prevents people from feeling connected to one another.Principle #5: Some forms of praise can be discouraging.Effective praise relies on describing, not judging
45 Encouragement Ways praise can be discouraging: Too generalRelies on value judgmentsFocus on how you feel or think teachings a child to seek approvalFor only successful/completed tasks; effort doesn’t matterNoticing children instead of judging:Start with “You…”Describe exactly what you seeEnd descriptive with a tagPraise is about forcing our judgments of who we think they should be onto our children.Encouragement is about accepting children for who they are.
46 EncouragementPrinciple #6: Children need encouragement, especially when they have made poor choices. Encouragement is basically a dose of hope. People need hope to feel safe.
47 Assertiveness Principle #1: What you focus on, you get more of! Don’t think about a purple alligator!We must tell the brain what TO do.
48 AssertivenessPrinciple #2: When you are upset, you are always focused on what you DON’T want.Skill #1: Pivoting, “About face!”Skill #2: Assertiveness- adults must set limits respectfully.When you focus on what you want, assertiveness comes naturally.Many times we fail to give students information on what TO doWe teach others how to treat us.Doubtful/unsure: invites others to boss and ‘help’Assertiveness: lets us set boundaries to say no when appropriate
49 AssertivenessGoal: to teach that speaking is more powerful than attacking verbally or physicallyYou have a right and responsibility to say “No!”Saying things like “I’m waiting!” or “Line up at the door, ok?” puts students in charge of the classroom- not you.Assertiveness is a learned behavior. To learn it, you must:Achieve self-awarenessMonitor your own thought patternsTeach and utilize assertiveness in all relationships
50 AssertivenessPrinciple #3: Passivity invites aggression, aggression begets aggression, and assertiveness dissipates aggression.Passivity:Wants to pleaseLongs to be perfectFear that decisions are not the correct onesAggression:Aims to winUses you-me accusationsSpeaks for others and acts as mind readerAssertiveness:Makes straightforward statementsGoal is clear communication
51 AssertivenessAssertiveness clearly tells children what to do so they may successfully meet your expectationsYou cannot be assertive if:You quiz othersThink for othersThink about what other think of youAssertive Teachers:Tell children what to doSend nonverbal messages “just do it” with toneAre clear and directGive children usable informationOwn and express feelings directlySpeak in concrete termsAre conscious of the intent behind the communication
52 Assertiveness Skill #3a: Assertive commands to individuals At eye level, make eye contactState student’s nameVerbally tell what you want them to doTouch student gently on armUse visual cues through gesturingSkill #3b: Assertive commands to groupsUse a signal or unifying experience to get the group’s attentionTeach an auditory and verbal signal
53 Assertiveness Skill #4: Tell and Show If students do not follow an assertive command, they are indicating they need additional support.Step 1: Give assertive command. If ignored, go to step 2.Step 2: Make eye contact (student makes contact with you) and say, “There you are!”Step 3: Say “I’m going to show you what I want you to do.”
54 Assertiveness Skill #5: I-messages help when frustration sets in. Indirect expression of emotion attacks children. Direct expression communicates with them.I-messages are direct expressions. They:Describe the behaviorDescribe the feeling you are having.Describe a tangible impact of the behaviorDescribe a different behavior that is helpful.“I don’t like it when you _____. It ________ because ________. Please _________ instead.”“When you ________, I feel ________ because _______. Please _________.”
55 AssertivenessPrinciple #4: Children must learn that they teach others how to treat them. They must learn to assertively deal with intrusive behaviors.Students tattle because they don’t know how to solve the problem.Skill #6: Tattling as a teaching tool.Passive/aggressive tattling: attempts to get revenge and punish the uncooperative personTattling out of fear: classroom isn’t safe, do something about it!Child feels intruded upon: child feels violated and doesn’t know what to do to fix it.
56 Assertiveness Tattling usually takes on one of three forms The child feels victimized.Your response: “Did you like it? Go tell ________, ‘I don’t like it when you ______.”Have them practice once or twice with you first, before sending them off.The child witnessed someone getting hurt.Your response: “I am the safekeeper. It’s my job to keep you safe. I’ll take care of it.”The child wants to get someone in trouble.Your response: “Are you telling me to be helpful or hurtful?”Many times the child will say helpful. Your response? “HOW is that helpful?”Have them tell you how they can be helpful instead of hurtful.