2 Do You Know Someone Who Has Experienced Abuse? If it was happening right now, are you sure you would know?Would they be too ashamed to speak about it?Would they hide it from you?Would they stop taking your calls? Stop attending social events?Would they give you strange explanations for their erratic behavior?Would they stop looking you in the eye when you talked?Would you be afraid to ask what was really going on?Domestic abuse is hidden and dangerous. Take the time tolearn more about it. Knowing what to do could help you save a life.
3 Domestic Abuse: Definition Domestic abuse is a pattern of intimidating and coercive behavior that includes the use or threat of violence and other menacing actions for the purpose of gaining power and control over another person.
4 Domestic Abuse in the U.S. One in every four women and nearly one in seven men in the U.S. have experienced severe physical violence by an intimate partner at some point in their lifetime.1 An estimated 1.3 million women are victims of physical assault by an intimate partner each year.2The cost of intimate partner violence exceeds $5.8 billion each year, $4.1 billion of which is for direct medical and mental health services.3Victims of intimate partner violence lost almost 8 million days of paid work because of the violence perpetrated against them. This loss is the equivalent of more than 32,000 full-time jobs. 3Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women between the ages of 15 and 44 in the United States; more than car accidents, muggings, and rapes combined.4
5 LocallyMost cases of domestic violence are never reported to the police.5 Even so, more than 12,000 DV arrests were made in Pima County in 2013.At least 17 people died in Pima County from domestic abuse in1. Intimate Partner Violence in the United States, 2010, a publication of the National Center for Injury Prevention and Control of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.2. Costs of Intimate Partner Violence Against Women in the United States Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, National Centers for Injury Prevention and Control. Atlanta, GA.3. Costs of Intimate Partner Violence Against Women in the United States Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, National Centers for Injury Prevention and Control. Atlanta, GA.4. "Violence Against Women, A Majority Staff Report," Committee on the Judiciary, United States Senate, 102nd Congress, October 1992, p.3.5. Frieze, I.H., Browne, A. (1989) Violence in Marriage. In L.E. Ohlin & M. H. Tonry (eds.) Family Violence. Chicago, IL: University of Chicago Press.6. AZ Coalition Against Sexual and Domestic Violence
6 Children & Domestic Abuse Witnessing violence between one’s parents or caretakers is the strongest risk factor of transmitting violent behavior from one generation to the next.1Boys who witness domestic violence are twice as likely to abuse their own partners and children when they become adults.230% to 60% of perpetrators of intimate partner violence also abuse children in the household.31. Break the Cycle. (2006). Startling Statistics.2. Strauss, Gelles, and Smith, “Physical Violence in American Families: Risk Factors and Adaptations to Violence” in 8,145 Families. Transaction Publishers (1990).3. Edelson, J.L. (1999). “The Overlap Between Child Maltreatment and Woman Battering.” Violence Against Women. 5:
7 Power & Control hitting criticizing forced sex choking pushing PsychologicalabuseMinimizing/ denyingIntimidationCoercion/ThreatsEntitlementEconomic abuseUsing Childrenhittingforced sexchokingname callingcriticizingpushingusing weaponsIsolation
8 Tactics an Abuser May Use IsolationDenying Access to MoneyPhysical AbuseAbusing ChildrenUsing WeaponsUnwanted TouchingRuining Your CreditBlamingSexual AbuseCriticizingCoercionName CallingDenying BehaviorBitingShifting BlameHittingThreatsForced SexPsychological AbuseHair PullingIntimidationChokingInfidelityCritical RemarksTreating You As InferiorThreatening or Cruelty to PetsMonitoring Your Calls or WhereaboutsMinimizingCultural wheels exist too.
9 Some of the Warning Signs Controlling behaviors: Telling partner how to style hair, what to wear, or always deciding where to go/what to do on dates; accompanying partner to appointments; getting inappropriately angry if partner is late or unavailable.Cruelty to animals: Punishing animals harshly and being insensitive to their suffering.Cruelty to children: Having unrealistic expectations of children’s capabilities; bullying or teasing children until they cry.Disrespect: Speaking disrespectfully to partner; being rude to waiters and waitresses; expressing racist or sexist attitudes; being outwardly disrespectful to others of different social background, religion, race, or people with disabilities.Double-standards: Having a different set of rules and expectations for partner and self.Continues on next slide
10 Warning SignsHistory of violent behavior: Having a history of violence in past relationships is predictive of violence in future relationships. Many, but not all abusers were victims of domestic abuse in their families while growing up.Isolation: Monopolizing partner’s time; sabotaging partner’s relationships with family and friends; calling or texting frequently to check up on partner.Impulsivity and mood swings: Not thinking through the consequences of actions; having explosive mood swings ie. “Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde;” ranting and raving over minor things.Jealousy: Demonstrating excessive possessiveness; expressing ownership of partner; dropping by unexpectedly; having friends “keep an eye” on partner; accusing partner of flirting with others; making excuses for jealous behavior by saying it is out of love.Continues on next slide
11 Warning SignsMinimization and blaming: Avoiding taking responsibility for actions; blaming others for problems and feelings; denying or minimizing past history of abuse or violence.Quick involvement: Pushing a partner to commit to a serious relationship very quickly; wanting partner to move in, get married, or have children in a short period of time or before they are ready.Threats of violence: “I’ll kill myself if you leave me” or “I’ll kill you if you leave me,” and/or dismissing threats with comments like, “I was just joking,” or “I really didn’t mean it.”Unrealistic expectations: Expecting partner to be perfect and meet all of their needs; expecting partner to conform to rigid gender roles; demanding that their needs come before partner’s needs.Use of force or coercion during sex: Guilt-tripping partner into having sex; showing little concern over whether partner wants or does not want sex.
12 Barriers to Leaving an Abusive Relationship LoveHope the relationship will get betterFearFinancial dependenceGuilt/Feelings of obligationFeeling responsible for what is happeningSelf-esteemCultural/Religious valuesChildrenIsolation/Lack of supportEmotional dependenceImmigration status
13 Take an Active RoleOur response to domestic abuse as a society is slowly changing, and we need your help to keep up the momentum.Be a loud public voice that let’s your family, friends, co-workers and social groups know that you do not condone abusive behavior against anyoneWhen others make uneducated comments about abuse or those who are being abused, coach them about the barriers to leaving abuse, and how dangerous it really is—they probably don’t realize how their negative comments might impact othersKnow how to reach out if someone you know is being abused, how you respond could be the very thing that inspires them to find helpPass this presentation on, you may never need to use this information—but someone you know definitely will need it at some point
14 Know the Signs & Respond Your response to what they tell you may determine whether they seek the help they need.Speak somewhere privateBe concerned for their safety and say soIf they deny abuse – express concern and state your availability to talk in the futureIf they disclose abuse – believe them and say soTell them it’s not their faultRespect their choices – they are the expert in what is and is not safe for themDon’t confront the abuser – this will put both you and the victim in additional dangerGive them hope that there is help
15 Do You or Does Someone You Know Need Help? Don’t Go It Alone!The hotline is for everyone, from people in abusive relationships to friends, loved ones, or even employers who need more information and support.24-Hour Bilingual HotlineLocal:Toll-free:
16 Against Domestic Abuse About Emerge! CenterAgainst Domestic AbuseEmerge!’s role is not to take control of the situation.Our objective is to have the participant regain theirsense of control and find their own path to a safer life.We are a 501(c)(3) non-profit agency.We rely on government funding and private donations from people like you.
18 Comprehensive Services One-on-one Support:Crisis CounselingSafety PlanningInformation & ReferralSupport Groups—Day & EveningDomestic Abuse & Life Skills EducationLay Legal Services:Orders of ProtectionCourt AccompanimentVictim’s Rights InformationLawyer Referrals & General InformationVAWA/U-VisaSupport/Referrals Related to Divorce & Child CustodyInformation About Legal Rights Related to Breaking Leases Due to Domestic ViolenceChild & Family Services:Individual & Group Sessions for ChildrenSessions that Help Children form Trusting Bonds with their Non-abusing Parent & SiblingsAge-appropriate interventions & educationFamily Sessions & GroupsFamily SupportExpressive Art & WritingPet TherapyHelp Setting Up Abuse-Free Homes:Transitional & Permanent Housing
19 Safety PlanningSafety plans are intended to help increase safety and decrease risk. They are the first step toward a new life.The professionals at the Emerge! hotline are able to assist in developing safety plans for each individual’s unique situation.If the abused person chooses not to call Emerge!, family or friends can call to find out the best way to help based on the specifics of that person’s circumstances.Keeping foliage trim prevents stalkers from hiding around the houseSecurity bars could mean a broom stick in the track of a sliding door or window – doesn’t necessarily mean full bars across windowsPack emergency bag – secure important documents, if not in the home then with a trusted friend or family memberO of P – Order of Protection
20 Learn more at: www.emergecenter.org or call 520-795-8001. Get InvolvedYou Can Make a Difference with this Issue!VolunteerRaise AwarenessDonateLearn more at: or call