1DEFINITIONSReclaimingTo recover,To take back what was taken
2WHAT IS RAPE / SEXUAL ABUSE IDENTIFYING CRIMESWHAT IS RAPE / SEXUAL ABUSERape is any kind of sexual intercourse (vaginal, oral, or anal) that is committed against a person's will or is committed with physical force or with a threat to hurt the victim or another person. It is also considered rape if the victim is intoxicated or unconscious and unable to give consent. Rape and sexual assault are not about sexual desire--they are about power and control.American society is the most violent in the industrialized world. Many aspects of the American culture contribute to a climate that fosters rape, including the objectification of women in advertising, violent pornography, and the oppression of women in the legal system.Karen Calivart -And He Restoreth My Soul published by Westbow Press a Division of Thomas Nelson and Zondervan 2011
3IDENTIFYING CRIMES Molestation is the crime of sexual acts with children up to the age of 18, including touching of private parts or exposureBabies as young as 1 to 8 days old havebeen reported to have been sexuallypenetrated and sodomized by teenageand adult abusersThe 15 year old who raped his 8 day old daughter was release because of a technicality he didn’t received a speedy trial. 1-day-old and still in the hospital, after a routine examination, vaginal tears were found on the infant. Police are only saying the tears were made with an “unknown object”. He received 10 minus the 11 months he had served. At the information I found was that the remaining part of his time would be served on probation.
4IDENTIFYING CRIMES Child abuse (maltreatment) physical abuse molestationpsychological abuse (what are some examples)neglect
5WHO ARE THE ABUSERS?Abusers can be parents or other family members, caregivers such as teachers or babysitters, acquaintances (including other children), and (in very rare instances) strangers
6IDENTIFYING CRIMES Domestic Violence The willful intimidation, physical assault, sexual assault, and/or other abusive behavior perpetrated by an intimate partner against another
7WHO IS AFFECTEDWomen are attacked about six times more often by offenders with whom they had an intimate relationship than are male violence victimsNearly 32 percent of all female homicide victims are killed by their husbands, former husbands or boyfriends
8WHO IS AFFECTEDIn contrast, only 3 percent of male homicide victims are killed by their wives, former wives or girlfriendsEveryday in the US, more than three women are murdered by their husbands or boyfriendsBecause husband/boyfriends rarely report intimate relationship abuse. Therefore, most of the data I will share today is related to women.
9WHO IS AFFECTED BY DOMESTIC VIOLENCE Every 9 seconds in the US a woman is assaulted or beatenNearly 1 in 5 teenage girls who have been in a relationship said a boyfriend threatened violence or self- harm if presented with a breakupStudies suggest that up to 10 million children witness some form of domestic violence annuallyHow many of you know of someone who experienced Domestic Violence?
10WARNING SIGNS The existence of emotional, mental and verbal abuse Threats and intimidationIsolation from family and friends
11WARNING SIGNS Controls all the family finances Violence may escalate when alcohol / drugs are usedGives expensive gifts after violent actsUses electronic devices to keep track of your locationDo you know of anyone who receives excessive phone calls from their spouse or intimate partner?
12TRUE OR FALSE Children make up stories about being sexually assaulted People who sexually assault children are strangers to the childMost sexual assaults happen in the home or in the home of people the child knowsANSWERS - FALSE , FALSE, FALSE, TRUE, FALSE
13TRUE OR FALSE30% to 60% of perpetrators of intimate partner violence also abuse children in the householdThe cost of intimate partner violence exceeds $5.8 billion each year, $4.1 billion of which is for direct medical and mental health servicesDomestic violence is one of the most chronically under reported crimesTrue, True, True
14INJURIES DUE TO INTIMATE-PARTNER VIOLENCE scratches, bruises, broken bones, dislocated jointshead or spinal cord injurieschipped or broken teethinternal injuriesNearly 80% of those who receive medical care are treated in a hospital, and 43.6% of those victims spend one or more nights thererape.http://www.whitehouse.gov/sites/default/files/docs/sexual_assault_report_ pdfDomestic Violence Victims and Rape Victims lose days from work which impacts their co-workers as well as the bottom line (Employer Income)
15DAMAGES CAUSED BY DOMESTIC VIOLENCE Emotional/Mental BlackmailLoss of Safety, Loss of boundaries, fearAbandonment – when incest is the crimeDepression – psychological imbalanceSadness, overwhelmedFeelings of Betrayal – especially when the crime involves someone the victim knows or when a parent is the perpetratorGuilt – blaming oneselfShameDeath – as a result of the crime
16THE ECONOMIC IMPACT- COSTS Studies indicate from $87,000 to $240,776 per rapeThe cost of domestic violence to the US economy is more than $8.3 This cost includes medical care, mental health services, and lost of productivityuse.gov/sites/default/files/docs/sexual_assault_report_ pdf
17FEDERAL SENTENCINGA favorable decision from the courts does not bring healingFederal law maximum sentence for sexual assault is 20 years + monetary finesFederal law provides compensation to victims for expenses directly related to the crime such as medical, physical and occupational therapy, attorney fees and other related expensesSee more at:
18PENALTY FOR RAPE IN CALIFORNIA Victim over 14 years of age (but not age of consent) the potential sentence seven to eleven yearsVictim under 14 years of age the potential sentence nine to thirteen years (this is Statutory Rape)
19PENALTY FOR THE CRIME Domestic Violence Prosecution Attorney determines if the crime is aMisdemeanor vs.FelonyPlease consult an attorney specializing in Domestic Violence Law.
20PENALTY FOR THE CRIMEThe state might also consider the defendant's prior or current criminal record and decide whether to pursue enhanced sentencingNote: State laws are constantly changing -- please contact a California criminal defense attorney or conduct your own legal research to verify the state law(s) you are researchingHow then can a survivor move from a fragmented state of being to wholeness?
21WHAT CAN WE DO?A Home is ALWAYS meant for a family to live peacefully.Healing means acknowledging, accepting that we were hurt. And that that hurt involved three areas:body, mind, and spiritSo, is healing possible? YES!If YES then HOW?
22A Safety Plan - A prevention center can help with this HEALINGHealing is not an overnight process. It takes time…..A Safety Plan - A prevention center can help with thisCenter For Community SolutionsTherapy - Choose carefully (recommendations/ referrals)
23Healing - ContinuedBeyond Survivor - Is a Three Stage Process for healing developed by Rachel Grant orNetwork - Develop a strong network of trusted friends/family to help you throughGroups - Joining a recommended group is very helpful because you don’t feel so alone.
24DEVELOPING A NEW MIND-SET Parents - Make an effort to know children's friends and their families.Boundaries - Teach, communicate and setEducation - parents, schools, higher educationCreate and develop - listening communication skillsDemonstrate RESPECT in the HOME
25DATING ETIQUETTE TO REMEMBER! Trust your instincts and Trust yourself and act accordinglyExamine your own feelings about sexNon-verbals signals- these are 70% to 90% of our communicationBe Independent and Aware of your Surroundings
26The soul is a lot more fragile than the human flesh.” So Be Kind To YOU!Thank you it has been my pleasure to be in your presence.