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Create Snapshots Find places to show a person’s movements/gestures. Paint a setting with description of a place. Listen to sounds and speech. Zoom in close.

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Presentation on theme: "Create Snapshots Find places to show a person’s movements/gestures. Paint a setting with description of a place. Listen to sounds and speech. Zoom in close."— Presentation transcript:

1 Create Snapshots Find places to show a person’s movements/gestures. Paint a setting with description of a place. Listen to sounds and speech. Zoom in close with a physical detail of a person or place. Try to use more than one of the five senses. Paint a feeling in a setting without saying what the feeling is.

2 Snapshot Find places to show a person’s movements/gestures. First Draft: My mom told me to listen to her. Revised Draft: Mom stood still, her arms crossed for what seemed like hours. Then, she pointed to the kitchen chair I used to do time out as a preschooler and commanded, “Sit. It’s time you listen to me.”

3 Snapshot Paint a setting with a description of place. First Draft: My bedroom was a safe place to hide from the day’s stress. Revised Draft: Crawling into my white antique iron bed, I nestled into the worn, denim, patched quilt given to me by Grandma Sally. The whir of the ceiling fan whispered and then lulled me to sleep.

4 Snapshot Listen to sounds and speech. First Draft: I heard them coming up the stairs. Revised Draft: I heard Tessa giggle, “Let’s yell surprise when Jackson arrives.” A clump, clump, clump on the stairs followed, and I knew my 6 foot 4 inch Uncle Albert was with her.

5 Snapshot Zoom in close with a physical detail of a person. First Draft: My baby sister sat on the bench and cried. Revised Draft: My baby sister’s mouth, wide as a baseball, howled all the way home; tears streamed like waterfalls down her blotchy red cheeks.

6 Snapshot Zoom in close with a physical detail of a place. First Draft: We sat in the kitchen and argued. Revised Draft: Debating widely, we hurled insults across the kitchen counter, littered with old newspapers, empty Starbucks cups, half-eaten powered donuts, and last night’s greasy onion rings.

7 Snapshot Try to use one or more of the five senses. First Draft: We drove to the hospital. Revised Draft: Driving to St. John’s Mercy, we inched through Highway 270’s traffic in fog thicker than winter’s chimney smoke and wondered which screaming siren yelled about our grandfather.

8 Snapshot Paint a feeling in a setting without saying what the feeling is. First Draft: Everyone in the gymnasium was nervous. Revised Draft: While most fans held their breaths and pressed their palms together in that let’s- pray-to-God-we-win manner, I bounced in the red bleacher seat motored by the high speed jiggling of my feet.

9 Create Snapshots Find places to show a person’s movements/gestures. Paint a setting with description of a place. Listen to sounds and speech. Zoom in close with a physical detail of a person or place. Try to use more than one of the five senses. Paint a feeling in a setting without saying what the feeling is.


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