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SWISH! #1 Imagery (Showing Instead of Telling) Choose two emotions from the list below and then write two separate short paragraphs (50+ words each) bringing.

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Presentation on theme: "SWISH! #1 Imagery (Showing Instead of Telling) Choose two emotions from the list below and then write two separate short paragraphs (50+ words each) bringing."— Presentation transcript:

1 SWISH! #1 Imagery (Showing Instead of Telling) Choose two emotions from the list below and then write two separate short paragraphs (50+ words each) bringing those emotions to life. However, you may not use the word selected and you may not tell. Rather, you must show. For example, if my emotion was anger, I might start mine off like this: The weary, crimson-faced truck driver slammed his fists repeatedly on the diner’s marble counter. “I need service,” he hollered, “and I need it now!!” Be sure and alternate between narration and dialogue like my example. Lastly, underline the key imagery words.

2 Ebullient Depressed Shocked Enraged Disappointed Surprised (in a good way) Confused Giddy (Look it up!) In love Embarrassed Peaceful

3 SWISH! #2 Showing versus Telling Choose three words from the list below, and write Dried chocolate caked corners of mouth smooth left cheek At least two or three sentences that could serve as an example for each of the chosen words. For example, if my word was “filthy,” I might write the following sentences: “Dried chocolate caked the corners of his mouth, flecks of hardened black beans dangled from his chin and smooth left cheek, and smeared avocado painted the left-center of his upper lip. Somewhere in Macon County a bathtub was shuddering.” Use at least 2 types of imagery. Highlight or underline your examples. Disgusting * Smelly * Beautiful * Greasy * Horrible * Hyper * Odd * Hideous * Sweltering * Frigid * Gloomy * Amazing * Uplifting * Dry

4 SWISH! #3 Showing Through Anecdote Anecdote – a short amusing or interesting story about a real person or event Pick one of the examples from the next slide. Then, write an anecdote (75+ words) that would show a reader what the example is without telling the reader what the example is. If the example was “He is afraid of cupcakes,” you might start like this: Bosco skittered past the tray of chocolate cupcakes; his countenance a dark portrait of fear and anxiety. “Would you like one?” his mother asked. “N-N-No, thank you,” Bosco

5 stammered. “Really, try one,” his mother said, picking one up and moving it towards him. Thinking quickly, Bosco slapped the cupcake out of his mom’s hand and sprinted from the room. From the stairs you could hear: “Cupcakes are evil!” You get the picture. 1. My dad is rarely there for me. 2. Bill is my best friend. 3. I always feel angry when I’m around Harriet (or Harry). 4. Nigel is always making me laugh. 5. My math teacher is an antidote for insomnia. 6. I loathe Hugh more than anyone in the world. 7. The cafeteria at lunchtime is a zoo. 8. Skateboarding is my life, man. 9. If it weren’t for Nancy, I wouldn’t be standing here right now. 10. Alex (or Alexa) is one weird dude (dudette). Choices

6 SWISH! #4 – Word Choice [Word Choice] Verbs of being are overused and lack the punch of many other verbs. Your assignment is to read the example on the next slide and get rid of all the “to be” verbs. A list of them follows: There are some words that are repeated often. Try to come up with different words to replace them. Use the right word, not the easy word. Imagery! Word choice involves picking powerful verbs and using different words for words repeated a lot. Finally, there is a lot of telling go on in this. I want you to show, baby! Think imagery.

7 There was a robbery at the Amesworth Jewelry Store. One of the tellers was able to sound the alarm. The police came as fast as they could, but there was so much traffic that they weren’t able to get to the store fast enough. The robbers were all tall and skinny and were wearing ski masks. Fortunately, there was a security camera in the store and the police saw what the getaway car looked like. It was dark blue with shiny rims and was a 1972 Chevy Camaro. The police, then, set up a roadblock to stop the car from leaving town. It was successful; they found the car and the robbers were arrested. am, is, isn’t, was, wasn’t, were, weren’t, are, aren’t, be, being, been, had been, has been, was being, were being, is being, are being, am being

8 SWISH! #5 – Word Choice [Word Choice] Verbs of being are overused and lack the punch of many other verbs. Your assignment is to read the example on the next slide and get rid of all the “to be” verbs. That is, rewrite each sentence replacing the “to be” verb with an active, more vivid verb. Also, feel free to move sentences around. Maybe the last sentence would work better as the second sentence and so on. Lastly, feel free to rearrange the words within a given sentence.

9 Totem poles are not religious artifacts. Although they are not used for worship, they are an important part of tribal life. They are historical records and monuments of honor. The poles are carved with pictures showing actual events and mythological legends. Many are made to honor a dead chief or other community personages. Mortuary posts are hollow and contain cremated remains. In Ketchikan, Alaska, there is a totem pole with a carving of Abraham Lincoln on top. He is wearing a frock coat and tall top hat. It is a tribute to Lincoln’s freeing the slaves, including Native American slaves. am, is, isn’t, was, wasn’t, were, weren’t, are, aren’t, be, being, been, had been, has been, was being, were being, is being, are being, am being

10 SWISH! #6 – Word Choice [Word Choice] Verbs of being are overused and lack the punch of many other verbs. Your assignment is to read the example on the next slide and get rid of all the “to be” verbs. That is, rewrite each sentence replacing the “to be” verb with an active, more vivid verb. Also, feel free to move sentences around. Maybe the last sentence would work better as the second sentence and so on. Lastly, feel free to rearrange the words within a given sentence.

11 The potato was not very popular in Europe as a whole until the nineteenth century. It was locally successful, however, at earlier dates. It was established in Ireland by the eighteenth century and was the almost exclusive diet of peasants. It was grown in England also, but for a long time it was mostly exported rather than being grown for home consumption. France was particularly backward as far as the potato was concerned; it continued to be disliked there until much later than in other countries, which is strange considering the most popular potato now is the French fry. am, is, isn’t, was, wasn’t, were, weren’t, are, aren’t, be, being, been, had been, has been, was being, were being, is being, are being, am being

12 SWISH! #? [Word Choice] Below are two sentences. You are to begin your paragraph with the first one and end your paragraph with the second one. Here are the rules: 1] You may not use “to be” verbs. 2] You must have three “money” words. Underline them. 3] You must have at least three lines of dialogue. 4] You must have 12 sentences minimum. 5] Show as much as possible. 6] Use at least two of the six types of imagery. Highlight them. [Start] Vrotmaer fell madly in love. [End] After a while, Vrotmaer couldn’t get a date with anyone. am, is, isn’t, was, wasn’t, were, weren’t, are, aren’t, be, being, been, had been, has been, was being, were being, is being, are being, am being

13 Adverbs, although good for beginning writers, invite vague (not clear enough, difficult to understand) description. Choose three of the adverbs listed below. Then, write a short showing paragraph (for each selection) that removes the offending adverb but gives great visual description. For example, if the adverbial phrase was “left quickly,” I might write the following: Gomer raced down the stairs; his alarm still buzzing in the background and bed-hair severely attached to his oval-shaped dome. On his way to the door, he snatched up a donut and stuck it in his pocket, downed a small glass of orange juice, said goodbye to his mother, latched on to his backpack, threw open the door, and sprinted to the bus stop. He made it with three seconds to spare. SWISH! #? [Word Choice]

14 1] shuffled slowly2] moved slyly 3] responded sadly4] lied deceptively 5] cutely shrugged6] gazed dreamily 7] entered regally8] played badly 9] prepared hastily10] laughed hysterically 11] drove crazily12] talked incessantly 13] asked relentlessly14] denied vehemently 15] stated rudely16] create one of your own

15 SWISH! #? Today, I’ll be reading you an excerpt from the J. Peterman Catalog. Then, you must think of your favorite article of clothing, and write an entry on that piece of clothing as though it were going to be placed in the J. Peterman Catalog. Before you write, though, think about your audience. What VOICE should you be using to address a person that would typically buy from this catalog? The next slide is my example. [Audience & Voice]

16 Back off, city slicker. This adornment is far too rugged for your dainty noggin. Only the eyes of the intrepid and untamed should peruse. Made with rich and intricate organic cotton, welcome this year’s Outback Sombrero. It commands respect as the kingly lion causes the rest of the animal kingdom to cower. Dazzling, vibrant, and vivid colors bring this must-have piece to life. Careful, though, gentlemen; ladies will be attracted to you like eyes to the late night campfire. Available in chestnut, tan, obsidian, khaki, and royal blue. Price: $187 Audience: Men who like to explore the wilderness.

17 SWISH! #? [Voice] Step One: Choose an animal from the first column Step Two: Choose a descriptor for this animal from column two Step Three: Choose a second animal in column one Step Four: Choose a descriptor for this second animal from column two Step Five: Now, compose a scene where the two animals interact somehow. Some examples are: A blind date, an argument, discussing the meaning of life, a marriage proposal, commenting on a painting, critiquing a play, movie, or band, etc. Step Six: Convey each animal’s descriptor so we can easily guess what it is.

18 Animal Choices:Voice Descriptor Choices: FishShy TurtleSneaky CrowFrightened MouseSelfish SnakeDestructive WolfSarcastic TigerStrong ScorpionCute DolphinLoyal Jack rabbitGenerous BunnyHumorous LizardBoasting CanaryLazy MonkeyCheerful BearCrazy HorseFearless FoxRude FalconKind FrogNagging SharkInconsiderate


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