Presentation on theme: "Creating Safe Environment"— Presentation transcript:
1 Creating Safe Environment In Salesian SettingFr. Steve Ryan SDB
2 Youth Work is a rewarding Apostolate – but not without dangers
3 Don Bosco – A Man with Vision – A Model of Chastity “Be vigilant – regarding your words, your deeds, your touch, your demeanor. ….Upon words and looks, even when indifferent, a bad interpretation is often put by young people who have been the victims of human passion”. – Don Bosco
4 The Present Crisis in the Church The Church and the Salesian Society never condone or have never condoned the horrific acts of sexual misconduct with children!
5 What Can We Do?Practice the Preventive System – thoroughly and completelyAssistance: concern for the group – no favoritismPrevention: Prevent disorders, unhappiness, sin, immorality and the exploitation of young people by doing the right thing, at the right time – in the right way!
6 What Can We Do?RememberBOUNDARIES: never put yourself in a situation where an accusation could occurRESPONSIBILITY: Be where you are supposed to be – doing what you are supposed to be doing as someone assigned to be protecting and guiding young peopleACCOUNTABILITY: Always let your superior know what you are doingREPORT SUSPECTED VIOLATIONS
7 Practical PointsNever find yourself alone, in a secluded place, with a child –if no one else is around –get out into the public where people are!Watch your speech-careless remarks about someone’s body – even as a total joke can harm & hurt & may be used against you as sexual harassment/abuse.(Knick-names) – DO NOT USE THEMIf you find yourself enjoying working & being around 1 particular young person – examine your motivations – Are you going out of your way to help this “lost” or “obnoxious” child or are you just attracted to her/him?
8 Practical PointsYour office or meeting room should always have at least one window – keep the door open – Try to have private conversations in public placesBe out in the open! We conduct our mission with the young – publicly!No one should ever drive a minor home by him/herselfYour living quarters are your living quarters –keep them private. No minor is ever to be invited to your home or room.Correct/report & challenge suggestive talk – do not allow such talk at Salesian Youth centers.
9 Practical Points There is no reason to go to a young persons home. Be open to the families of the youth we serve, (not just the youngster in the family) – Get to know the family – the parents. Identify yourself to the parents—on the phone and in person.Know when you feel attracted to someone –put up a self-made boundarySex education is done in a group setting –if/when parents/institutional permission is granted for it. It is not your job to do sex education stuff!Movies – no R rated with minors!
10 Practical PointsDiscipline and Prayers! – Know yourself as a sexual person!TOUCH – There is “proper” & “improper”. Be prudent with touch – in general there is no reason to touch a minor.Modesty – appropriate dressACCOUNTABILITY: Tell your director/boss where you are going & what you are doing! – In a family you tell your parents what you are up to!KNOW YOURSELF AS A SEXUAL PERSON: Take care of your emotional health! Keep balance emotionally! When we have our affectivity needs met – there is very little chance for improper sexual behaviors being used.
11 Scope of the Problem 1 in 4 girls 1 in 8 boys 15% of school children 57% of abuse in schools is perpetrated by males43% of abuse in schools is perpetrated by females300% increase in child to child abuse40 – 50% of all child molestations are committed by juveniles
12 Effects of Sexual Abuse on Victims Poor self-esteemGuilt & ShameAnxiousWithdrawal form activitiesFears & PhobiasHomicidal ideationSuicidal IdeationLearned helplessnessPsychological
13 Effects of Sexual Abuse on Victims EducationalTruancyPoor concentrationDrop in grades
14 Effects of Sexual Abuse on Victims BehavioralEating disordersBed-wettingSubstance abuseNightmaresRunning awayImpulsivityDefianceSelf-mutilation
15 Effects of Sexual Abuse on Victims InterpersonalArgumentativeHostileDependentAggressivePoor boundaries
16 Effects of Sexual Abuse on Victims Preoccupation with sexIncreased masturbationConfused sexual orientationPromiscuityProstitutionMolestation of others
17 Who Abuses? Types of Offenders Type I. The Preferential OffenderThis is a person who would rather have a child for a social, romantic & sexual partner than an adult. This person will seek jobs, volunteer work, & other activities where he or she will have ample opportunities to access the preferred type of child (gender, age, physical characteristics).Type II. The Situational OffenderThis is a person who does not necessarily prefer children, but offends under a certain set of circumstances. This person often offends during a difficult time in his or her life & may be more likely to offend when he or she is intoxicated or severely depressed or anxious.
18 Who Abuses? Types of Offenders Type III. The Sadistic or Indiscriminant OffenderThis is a person who will simply prey on any available vulnerable person: a child, an adult with mental retardation, a teenager in the hospital or an elderly person. Their arousal pattern is attached more to the pain & suffering of the victim than to the specific physical characteristics of the victim.
19 Characteristics of Offenders Childhood HistoryMALE FEMALEAbused as a child Raised in excessively strict homePsychiatric problems Poor school performanceDelinquent or Caregiver inconsistencyantisocial actionsCaregiver inconsistency
20 Characteristics of Offenders Personality CharacteristicsMALE FEMALELow self esteem Exhibits poor judgmentDistorted beliefs Illogical or bizarre thinkingabout sexDistorted beliefs Overall sense of inadequacyabout childrenNot a team playerDenies stressSees self as a victim
21 Characteristics of Offenders BehaviorsMALE FEMALEUses alcohol or Uses alcohol orother drugs other drugsPoor impulse control Few accomplishmentsEasily Frustrated DeceitfulPrior arrests for othertypes of offenses
22 Characteristics of Offenders Interpersonal RelationshipsMALE FEMALEPrefers to interact Lonely, socially isolatedwith childrenPattern of dating Married as a teenagersingle mothersUnable to form Single, divorced orattachments dysfunctional marriage
23 Characteristics of Offenders EmploymentMALE FEMALEFrequent or abrupt More likely to berelocations caregiverUnstable work history Un–or underemployedAnxious to be hired forposition with children
24 Characteristics of Offenders Interactions with ChildrenMALE FEMALEDistorted perception More likely to use seductionof childrenPrefers one-on-one Seeks affection from childreninteractions w/ childrenPhotographs children Blames childrenSelect hobbies appealingto childrenIdentifies with childrenbetter than adults
25 Spot the Warning SignsPay attention to the warning signs of preferential offendersFinds reason to spend time alone with minors.Prefers time with minors than time with peers.Gives gifts to minors, especially without permission.Goes overboard with physical contact with minors.Always wants to wrestle or tickle minors.Shows favoritism toward certain minors.
26 Spot the Warning Signs Treats minors like equals or adults Keep secrets with minors.Ignores policies about interacting with minors.Break the rules.Uses inappropriate language with minors.Tells “off-color” jokes to minors.
27 Spot the Warning SignsPay attention to the warning signs of situational offendersExcessively using alcohol.Uses drugs.Experiencing anxiety or depression.Having trouble coping with loneliness.Facing rejection or disappointment.Coping with personal loss.Feels unappreciated & unrewarded for hard work.Becoming increasingly dependent on a “convenient” relationship with a minor, such as a minor who works in the house or is already involved with an individual.
28 Keep Yourself SafeBehaviors that have led to false allegations of abuse:Meeting alone in isolated places.Showing favoritism.Engaging in physical contact that was misinterpreted.Wearing provocative or revealing attire.Giving money to a “special” minor.Meeting in homes & in bedrooms without others present.Being nude in front of minors.Sleeping in the bed with minors.Giving special or secret gifts.
29 Keep Yourself SafeBehaviors that have led to false allegations of abuse:Graphically discussing sexual activities or allowing others to do so.Keeping “secrets” about relationships.Failing to adhere to uniform or accepted standards of affection.Showing affection when no one else was around.Staring while others were dressing.Commenting on minor’s bodies.Taking pictures while minors are dressing or showering.Shaming or belittling an individual.
30 Boundary ViolationsPhysical boundary violations means touching too much or touching in ways most adults would not touch a child.
31 Boundary ViolationsEmotional Boundary Violations means treating the relationship with a child as if it were a romantic or intimate adult relationship.
32 Boundary ViolationsBehavioral boundary violations means involving a child in activities that his or her parents would not allow the child to do.