Presentation on theme: "Social Styles Raising self awareness and enhancing your influence"— Presentation transcript:
1 Social Styles Raising self awareness and enhancing your influence Professor Robert BontempoColumbia University Graduate School of Business
2 ASSERTIVENESS - is a measure of the degree to which you see yourself as tending to ask or as tending to tell as you interact with others..
3 ASK ASSERTIVE TELL ASSERTIVE cautious and reserved about sharing opinions;questioning;low-key, quietTELL ASSERTIVEopinionated,forceful; makesstatements anddeclarations;directs actionsof others
4 Assertiveness ME ASKS TELLS Ask Assertive Slower pace Fewer Statements Quieter VolumeNon-Directive/Relaxed Use of HandsLeans BackIndirect Eye ContactTell AssertiveFaster PaceMore statementsLouder VolumeDirective Use of Hands/Points for EmphasisLeans forwardDirect Eye Contact
5 RESPONSIVENESS - is a measure of the degree to which you see yourself as tending to control - i.e. keep your feelings and emotions inside - or, it is the degree to which you emote - i.e. outward display your feelings and emotions with others.
6 CONTROL EMOTE focus on ideas, things, data and tasks; tend not to sharefeelings publiclyEMOTEreadily shares feelings;expresses anger, joyhappiness, hurt feelings
7 Responsiveness More Controlling Monotone Task Subjects Facts/Data Less Use of HandsRigid PostureControlled Facial ExpressionsCONTROLSMore EmotingInflectionsPeople SubjectsOpinions/StoriesMore Use of HandsCasual PostureAnimated Facial ExpressionsMEEMOTES
8 CONTROL ASK ASSERTIVE TELL ASSERTIVE EMOTE focus on ideas, things, dataand tasks; tend not to sharefeelings publiclyASK ASSERTIVEcautious andreserved aboutsharingopinions;questioning;low-key, quietTELL ASSERTIVEopinionated,forceful; makesstatements anddeclarations;directs actionsof othersEMOTEreadily shares feelings;expresses anger, joyhappiness, hurt feelings
9 Verbal and Non-Verbal Cues 1. Monotone2. Task Subjects3. Facts/Data4. Less Hand Movement5. Rigid Posture6. Controlled Facial ExpressionsCONTROLS1. Slower Pace2. Fewer Statements3. Quieter Volume4. Non-directive/RelaxedUse of Hands5. Leans Back6. Indirect Eye Contact1. Faster Pace2. More Statements3. Louder Volume4. Directive Use ofHands/Pointsfor Emphasis5. Leans Forward6. Direct Eye ContactEMOTESASKSTELLS1. Inflections2. People Subjects3. Opinions/Stories4. More Hand Movement5. Casual Posture6. Animated Facial Expressions
10 Social StylesCONTROLSAnalyticalDrivingASKSTELLSEMOTESAmiableExpressive
12 More Telling + More Controlled Behavior Driving StyleMore Telling + More Controlled BehaviorCONTROLASK ASSERTIVETELL ASSERTIVEEMOTEPresent time frameDirect actionTends to avoidinactionSwift actionMaximum effort to controlMinimum concern forcaution in relationships
13 More Telling + More Emoting Behavior Expressive StyleMore Telling + More Emoting BehaviorCONTROLASK ASSERTIVETELL ASSERTIVEEMOTEFuture time frameImpulsive actionTends to avoidisolationRapid actionMaximum effort to involveMinimum concern forroutine
14 More Asking + More Emoting Behavior Amiable StyleMore Asking + More Emoting BehaviorCONTROLASK ASSERTIVETELL ASSERTIVEEMOTEPresent time frameSupportive actionTends to avoidconflictUnhurried actionMaximum effort to relateMinimum concern foraffecting change
15 More Asking + More Controlled Behavior Analytical StyleMore Asking + More Controlled BehaviorCONTROLASK ASSERTIVETELL ASSERTIVEEMOTEHistorical time frameCautious actionTends to avoidpersonal involvementSlow actionMaximum effort to organizeMinimum concern forrelationships
17 Style Risk Advice Analytical Amiable Expressive Driver Inflexible, nit pickingDecide, take a standAmiableConforming, permissiveSet/achieve goals, challenge others to do their bestExpressiveOverbearing, unrealisticRestrain yourselfDriverDomineering, unfeelingListen to others
18 Analytical Driver Amiable Expressive DECISION MAKING Uses Facts Historical EvidenceData, and ExperienceRelationship BasedTrust and ReassuranceCost Benefit AnalysisPushing to ConclusionVivid DramaticTestimonyDECISION MAKINGUses FactsAvoids RisksTakes RisksUses OpinionsReference: Williams and Miller (2002). Change the Way You Persuade, HBR.