Presentation on theme: "Healthy Relationships"— Presentation transcript:
1Healthy Relationships Self-EsteemRelationshipsDating & intimate relationshipsGrades 7-8Adapted From: Beyond the Basics: A Sourcebook on Sexuality and Reproductive Education.Canadian Federation for Sexual Health, 2005.
3Self-Esteem:Self-esteem is the value we place on ourselves. It is the knowledge that we are lovable, we are capable, and we are unique.Good self-esteem means:having a healthy view of yourself,having a sense of self-worth,having a positive outlook,feeling satisfied with yourself most of the time,setting realistic goals.
4Points about Self-Esteem: Self-esteem is crucial to our personal wellness.Self-esteem is based on life experiences and personal relationships.Self-esteem changes over time depending on life circumstances.Can anyone think of examplesto prove these points?
5Healthy Self-Esteem Includes: The ability to develop healthy relationshipsHaving healthy thoughts and feelings about your bodyAwareness/acceptance of personal strengths and weaknessesThe acceptance of one’s sexualityThe ability to accept responsibility for one’s behaviourFeelings of competence, independence, self- control and respect for othersThe ability to set limits for oneself and to create boundaries
6How is Self-Esteem Developed? By our environment?How others see us?Personal awareness of strengths?Support from significant others (family, friends)?Body image?Mental health?Physical abilities?Stereotypes?Culture?Gender?
7How Does Self-Esteem Contribute to Healthy Relationships? Self-esteem and relationships are really two sides of the same coin. . .Having healthy self-esteem allows you to develop healthy relationshipsAndHaving healthy relationships helps to develop healthy self-esteem.
9Relationships Defined: A relationship is simply a connection between two or more people.A relationship does not have to be a romantic relationship.Relationships are based on some commonly accepted values (e.g., respect, honesty, fairness, consideration, commitment).A healthy relationship is a shared responsibility and requires effective communication.A relationship can be affected by controllable and uncontrollable factors.
10Types of Relationships: There are many different types of relationships that serve many different purposes.Can you name some different types of relationships?
11Examples of Relationships: FriendshipAcquaintanceParent-ChildTeammateMentorSiblingBoyfriend/GirlfriendNeighborTeacher-StudentBoss-WorkerCo-workerClassmateWhat do you think these people get out of their relationships?
12Characteristics of a Healthy Relationship: ClosenessYou are caring and loyalYou trust each otherYou share your feelingsYou support each otherShared Goals & BeliefsYou share beliefs & valuesYou recognize & respect each other’s differencesShared ExperiencesShare interests & friendsTalk about your experiences; accept & respect each other’s differencesCommunicationYou are honest with each otherYou listen to each otherRespectYou use respectful language and actions with one anotherYou understand each other’s wishes and feelingsYou can compromiseHumourYou enjoy being with each other and can laugh togetherCaringYou show each other you care
13Unhealthy Characteristics in a Relationship: No trustNo respectJealousyAbuse: emotional/physicalLow self-esteemPower issuesFearLiesUnfair fightsLack of understandingLittle or bad communicationManipulationBased only on physical attractionPartner tries to change you
14Qualities of a Relationship Class ActivityAdapted from: Beyond the Basics: A Sourcebook on Sexual and Reproductive Health Education. Canadian Federation for Sexual Health, 2005.
15Stress and Pressure in Relationships: Unhealthy characteristics in a relationship will lead to stress and possible pressures in a relationship.Some of these characteristics may only apply in a dating relationship, but many can apply in all sorts of relationships (best friends, acquaintances, siblings).Remember, if you find yourself feeling pressured or controlled in a relationship, talk to someone you trust about the situation. Always ask for help when you need it.
16Making Positive Decisions: If you are faced with stress or pressure in a relationship, it is important to make positive decisions:Think of all your choicesThink of the most likely results of those choicesThink of the risks involved with each choiceAfter you have made a decision, learn from it. Did it work? Why or why not?
17Case Study 1:You have an agreement with your parents that you are to go home every day after school and do your homework until one of them gets home from work. Since this is an opportunity to get homework done, you are not allowed to have friends over after school. Today, however, a couple of friends try to talk you into hanging out with them after school. Since neither of your parents get home until almost 6:00 pm, you could hang out with your friends and then go home without your parents knowing. What should you do?Grades 5 to 7
18Case Study 2:Tina is out with her friend Cheryl, Cheryl’s boyfriend Tony, and another friend named Chris. After a while, Cheryl and Tony start to kiss. Chris then starts kissing Tina. This feels pretty good to Tina. But then Chris tries to get Tina to go into the bedroom. Tina says “NO”, but her friend Cheryl tells Tina not to be so lame. What should Tina do?Grade 8
19Communication Skills: Communication is an important part of all relationships.We all communicate verbally and non-verbally. Listening is also an important part of communicating.It is important that we all learn to communicate directly with one another.
20Types of Communication: Passive: giving in and saying yes when you don’t want to; keeping your concerns to yourselfAggressive: using threats or force; dominating others; putting yourself first at the expense of othersPassive-Aggressive: giving in or keeping your concerns to yourself but will later get back at the person in a sneaky wayAssertive: standing up for your rights without denying the rights of others; asking for what you want in a straightforward manner
21How to be Assertive:In order to communicate in an assertive manner, it is important to make eye contact and to speak in a clear, firm voice. Try using “I” messages.I feel _______ when ______ and I want ______.Try using an “I” message for these situations:A friend keeps asking to copy your homework and you don’t want to give it to him/her.Your partner tells you that he/she wants to have sex, but you just don’t want to.
23Dating Situations Class Activity Adapted from: White Ribbon Campaign in a Box: Promoting Healthy, Equal Relationships.Toronto: White Ribbon Campaign, 2007.
24When You Decide to Date: A healthy relationship makes you feel good about yourself and your partner.You have fun together and you and your partner can be yourselves.All relationships are different, but healthy relationships share at least five things in common - the S.H.A.R.E. qualities.S = safetyH= honestyA= acceptanceR= respectE= enjoymentSource: Healthy Relationships. SexualityandU.ca, 2010.
25Bad Reasons for a Relationship: Because many of your friends have girlfriends or boyfriendsBecause you are lonelyBecause you want to seem more matureBecause you want to prove somethingBecause your friends are pressuring you into dating someoneBecause someone is pressuring you about having sex
26Creating Boundaries in Relationships: These are like invisible lines that you set around yourself to separate “you” from others (your romantic partner included). They also set limits to protect ourselves physically and emotionally. They let us and others know what we are comfortable with and what we are uncomfortable doing.
27Relationships and Sexual Activity: There is no simple answer or checklist to tell you that you are ready to have sex.You need to look inside yourself to know if you are ready to have sex. You also need to be comfortable talking to your partner about sex, risks and how to have safer sex.If you’re not comfortable talking about sex and/or preparing to have safer sex, you’re not ready for it.
28Always Ask Yourself:Before deciding to have sex, look at how you feel about yourself and about your partner.Do you trust your partner?Do you enjoy being around them?Do you want to be intimate with them?Would you feel comfortable being naked with them?Remember…If you don’t feel like you can be yourself with your partner, or you feel pressured into doing things you’re not comfortable with or that you wouldn’t normally do, always talk to someone you trust and get help if you need it.
29Reasons for Not Engaging in Sexual Activity: It is normal and okay to wait as long as you want before having sex.The decision is yours to make, and it is going to be yours to live with.Make sure it is the right decision.Sex is a personal issue. It’s something that you should discuss with your partner, yourself and maybe your doctor. It’s your choice, and that’s all that matters.Don’t worry about what everyone else is doing; independence is a sign of maturity…having sex is not.
30Other Reasons to Wait: Religious beliefs Concerns about reputation Possibility of pregnancyPossibility of sexually transmitted infectionsPersonal belief in abstinenceWaiting for the right partnerLack of trust in your partner or the future of the relationshipNot feeling ready