Presentation on theme: "Helping your child succeed in school (and life)"— Presentation transcript:
1Helping your child succeed in school (and life) LOVE & SUPPORTHelping your child succeed in school (and life)Mrs. CJ Fisher & Mrs. Katie Brown ELL Family Night, 12/12/12Shuksan Middle School
2Why We’ve Gathered Tonight Families’ attitudes and actions can ensure students success.Families will gain practical strategies for supporting their child's learning and success at schoolFamilies will choose two learning actions to try at homeFamilies will learn that other parents face similar difficulties at home and feel a sense of community.
3Truth #1#1. Children need love and support before they need academic tutoring
4What leads to student success? "Studies show that children who feel respected and valued in their families do better in school, have more friendships, and live healthier, more successful lives.”Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child, Dr. John Gottman
5Support = showing empathy What it is:Empathy is an understanding what a child feelsIt is a true understanding that the task is difficult.You don’t have to agree to empathizePOSSIBLE ACTIONWhat it sounds like:"Yes, it will probably be a tough [assignment] today. C'mon, let me help you get ready."youthsports.rutgers.edu
6Support = speaking love & encouragement POSSIBLE ACTIONTry to up your ratio of positive to negative comments.4:1? 5:1? 8:1?The number doesn’t matter… the impact is what matters.On average, we have 20 minutes a day to…register a complaint, a command, or a request for assistanceAs kids grow older, the ratio of negative to positive comments appears to increasefamilyeducation.com
7Words that make kids feel great Yes Good Fine Very good Very fine Excellent Marvelous That’s right Correct Wonderful I like the way you do that I’m pleased with (proud of ) you That’s good Wow Oh boy Very nice Good work Great going Good for you Great effort That’s the way Much better O.K. You’re doing better Good idea What a clever idea That’s it Good job Great job controlling yourself I like the way you ______ I noticed that you ____ Keep it up I had fun ______ with you You are improving at ______ more and more You showed a lot of responsibility when you ______ Way to go I appreciate the way you ______ You are great at that You’re the best Good remembering That’s beautiful I like your______ I like the way you ______ with out having to be asked
8Truth #2Families do play a critical role in students’ academic success as strategic coaches, not demanding bossesYes!
9ATTITUDES OF SUPPORTIVE FAMILIES Praise kids for working hard, not for being smartBrain Rules by Dr. John MedinaWhat can happen when we praise kids for being smart?Encourage “personal best”Personal best does not mean perfectLearning is not the same thing as high gradesWe all need the freedom to learn from our mistakesShow interest in school workAvoid nagging and over-interrogating about home workHere are some more great ideas….
10Show Interest In School by… Talk about school each day.Ask to see class work.Listen to your child read aloudRead to and with your child from a variety of material in your first language.Contact teachers for Wednesday meetings
11ACTIONS OF SUPPORTIVE FAMILIES Help set goals.GradesActivitiesBehaviorsOrganize with your child.BackpackAgenda/PlannerBinderEstablish homework routineSame place and time every daySupport100 % attendanceAttendance linked to graduation rates
12Truth #3All families experience academic and school difficulties. There are many resources (other parents included) to help solve specific problems.
13ADVICE FROM “Help on the Home Front for Disappointing Grades,” from Getting to Calm by Dr. Laura KastnerDon’t make it worse.Keep a positive relation-ship.Link homework and good grades to social freedoms or to temporary prizes.Organize the home space.
14Organize the home space. Teens may need their parents’ help in planning, organizing and persisting.Intrude as little as possibleHelp a disorganized teen manage his social and athletic life to include a time and place for concentrating on schoolwork.POSSIBLE ACTIONDecide on a block of time for home study hallLimit access to media.Figure out the best locationDetermine whether parent “coaching” will be effectiveConsult with teachers or school counselors, who may have additional ideas and insights into the problem.
15Strategies When Grades Slip Make a plan with your student’s inputMake homework time, learning timeAsk for help
16Make a plan with your student’s input. They won’t do it, if they don’t buy in.What plan can you create with your student to improve grades?POSSIBLE ACTIONCreate a homework contract with your studentUse it for a limited timeMonitorCheck inAdjustCelebrateGetting to Calm (Kastner, p. 213)
17Make homework time, learning time. How can you respond if your student says, “I don’t have homework!POSSIBLE ACTIONMake study time a priorityUse Learning Time Checklist or other resources for additional learning activities
18Reach out for help.Since all families experience these problems, there are many, many resources.POSSIBLE ACTIONUse problem/solution cards for strategic interventionCall your student’s teachersJoin a parent class like “Strengthening Families”
19Sometimes, we all benefit from taking a step back. Truth #4Sometimes, we all benefit from taking a step back.
20The Big 10 Characteristics of a Successful Teen Motivation and drivePractical reasoning and judgmentMoral attentiveness and characterEmotional awarenessHealthy habitsSelf-control and emotional managementSocial skillsCommunication skillsIntellectual interests and abilitiesSpiritual awarenessGetting to Calm (Kastner), p. 225
21How can we set up our students for success in life? Focus on an authoritative and warm relationship with studentsView intellectual interests as only one of a whole set of developing characteristicsGetting to Calm (Kastner), p. 225
22What are some take-aways from tonight’s discussion? *Let’s review our checklist. Select 2-4 strategies you would like to start using with your student.*Write a note of encouragement. If you’d like to take a moment to connect with your student, blank note cards are available.*Thank you for attending tonight. This presentation and other handouts will be available on Shuksan’s webpage in the “Families” section. Please contact any Shuksan staff member with any questions or concerns.
23Resources These resources were consulted in the preparation of this class U.S. Department of EducationBrain Rules by John MedinaBeyond Smart by Linda MorganGetting to Calm by Kastner & Wyatt“Parent to Parent” videos on King 5 or at parentmap.com40 Developmental Assets for AdolescentsThe Lawrence Hall of Science at UCAL, Berkeleysupport