Presentation on theme: "GENDERED COMMUNICATION PRACTICES Communication between men and women can be like cross cultural communication, prey to a clash of conversational styles."— Presentation transcript:
GENDERED COMMUNICATION PRACTICES Communication between men and women can be like cross cultural communication, prey to a clash of conversational styles Deborah Tannen (1990)
WOMENS SPEECH n For Most Women Communication is: n to establish and maintain relationships n conversation is for sharing and learning about others n Talk is the essence of relationships
EQUALITY n Equality between people is generally important n try and achieve symmetry n often match experiences –youre not alone in how you feel –Ive done the same thing many times n respond and build on each others ideas –Rather than you-tell-your-idea- then-Ill-tell-mine, voices weave together to create conversations.
SHOWING SUPPORT n Often express understanding & Sympathy –Oh, you must feel terrible –I think you did the right thing –I really hear what you are saying
RELATIONSHIP LEVEL n Focus on feelings n Focus on relationship between communicators rather than content n often probe to understand feelings –Tell me about what happened? –How did you feel when it occurred? –Do you think it was deliberate? n Content is dealt with but also feelings involved.
CONVERSATION MAINTENANCE n Womens style is conversational maintenance work n efforts to sustain talk n often initiate topics for others –How was your day –Tell me about your meeting –Did anything interesting happen on your trip
INCLUSIVITY n RESPONSIVENESS n usually respond in some fashion n verbally and nonverbally more engaged n make other feel valued and included
PERSONAL, CONCRETE STYLE n Typical of women's conversation are personal disclosures details anecdotes concrete reasoning
TENTATIVENESS n Verbal Hedges I kind of feel you may be overreacting n Qualifiers Im not the best judge of this, but... n Keep Talk Provisional, Tag questions that invite response That was a pretty good movie, wasnt it? We should get out this weekend, dont you think?
MENS SPEECH n Goal of talk is exerting control, preserving independence, and enhancing status. n Conversation is the arena for proving oneself & negotiating prestige.
Mens Speech n General Tendencies n Use talk to establish and defend personal status and ideas n When comforting, they do so by respecting others independence and avoiding condescending
SHOW KNOWLEDGE, SKILL, OR ABILITY n Avoid disclosing personal information that might appear weak or vulnerable e.g., someone expresses concern about a relationship with a boyfriend –The way you should handle that is... –Dont let him get to you. –You ought to tell him....
ADVICE n Tendency to give ADVICE n Instrumental - not feeling, but rather what you should do n Superiority - Maintain control n Men see as give and take, Women as lack of concern
INSTRUMENTALITY n Instrumentality - The use of talk to accomplish instrumental objectives n Men socialized to do things, achieve goals n In talk this is expressed as problem-solving, getting information, facts, suggesting solutions n This focus on content works between men n Show support in ways learned to do so - solve the problem.
CONVERSATIONAL DOMINANCE n Men tend to dominate conversations - talk more than women n Talk more frequently n For longer duration n Select topic of talk Interrupt more Men interrupt to control conversation Women interrupt to show interest, affirm
ABSOLUTE, ASSERTIVE TALK –Language tends to forceful, direct, authoritative –Less use of hedges and disclaimers
ABSTRACT TALK n Speak in general terms n Fewer concrete experiences n More distanced from personal feelings n Works best in Public situation where theoretical & conceptual, talk is appropriate
LESS RESPONSIVE n More minimal response cues n Less sympathy and self- disclosure Sympathy seen as sign of condescension Personal problems seen as vulnerability
Talking about Troubles n Woman disappointed in not getting job –Man says, You shouldnt feel bad. Lots of people dont get jobs they want She thinks, he belittles her experience He thinks, he is showing respect by bolstering her independence
Talking about Troubles, Cont. n Man disappointed is not getting job –Woman says, Are you okay Whats bothering you? He thinks this points out his vulnerability She probes to show she cares
RELATIONSHIP TALK n WOMEN n Its going fine if there is talk n Talk is a process to sustain relationship n Talk is a way to show closeness –We need to talk, to affirm our caring n MEN n Its going fine if there is no need to talk n Talk is to solve problems n Talk indicate a problem –Duck when she say, we need to talk
GENDER QUESTIONNAIRE n Men talk more than women. T/F nTnT n Men are more likely to interrupt women than they are to interrupt other men. nTnT n Women tend to confront problems more directly and are likely to bring up the problem first. nTnT
Questionnaire, cont. n During conversation men spend more time looking at their partner than women do. nFnF n Women are more alert to nonverbal cues than men are. nTnT n Groups that use the male style of sticking to the task get more work done. nFnF n In general men and women talk about the same things. nFnF n Women use less personal space than men do. nTnT n When a man speaks, he is listened to more carefully than a woman, even if the presentation is identical. nTnT
Questionnaire, cont. n In general women speak in a more tentative style than men do. nTnT n Women are more likely than men to disclose personal information. nTnT n In general men smile more often than women. nFnF n Women are more likely than men to answer questions that are not addressed to them. nFnF n Women and men are equally emotional when they speak. nTnT n Men appreciate jokes more than women. nTnT
THE END Based on Julia Woods book Gendered Lives