1. Hello and welcome to today’s training.
I hope you learn a lot.
Acknowledgement of country

2. Asking for what I want
Training today is about asking for what you want – and getting it!

3. There are 5 parts to this training
Thinking about what you want
Getting ready to ask for what you want
Using skills of persuasion
Saying your message effectively
Being brave about speaking up
During this training session you will be talking about ideas that will help you ask for what you want in a way that other people understand and act on.
You will get a chance to watch videos, write draw and practice what you learn.
We will be talking about
What you want to ask for
Getting ready to ask for what you want
Using skills of persuasion
Saying your message effectively and
Being brave about speaking up – this is about dealing with any fears you may have about speaking up

4. Write down what you learn
You can write down the things you talk about.
That way you will remember what you learn.

5. Getting to know you My name is… I come from…
I am doing this training because…
Let’s get to know each other better.
If there is enough time. Get people to say these things to the group.
If not, they could say them to the person next to them.
Great – so, let’s get started!

6. What do you want to change? What do you want to ask for?
Thinking about what you want
As a leader, you have a chance to make a difference. You will be able to work to make good changes in your life and in the community.
Give handout 1
But working to change things takes time and energy. It is good to think carefully about what you want to focus on.
What do you want to change? What do you want to ask for?
It could be something big. Or small.
For example
I want there to be more paths in my area.
I want employers to give more people with disability jobs.
I want a dog run at my local park.
I want some rules in my home so everyone does their share of housework.
You can use handout 1 to write down what you are thinking about. You may have lots of ideas. If you do, choose 1. Feel free to talk to the person sitting next to you.
Check that everyone has come up with something.
What ideas did people have? Get people to call out

7. Preparing to ask for what you want
Before you ask for what you want, you will need to prepare.
You are more likely to get what you want if you can show other people that what you are asking for is a good idea.
There is a framework that can guide your planning.
The framework will help you make your message be heard and be acted on.
Other words for a framework are a structure, process or guide.

8. 5 parts to explaining your message
1. What is the context?
What is the background?
2. What is the issue?
Talk about the whole picture.
Give out handout 2 – say what it is
There are 5 parts to the framework.
We will go through each part so don’t worry if it is not completely clear at first.
The first 2 parts are
What is the context or background?
When you explain the context it is like an introduction to what you are talking about. Explaining the context is important.
You can show that you understand what you are talking about.
You can also show how what you are talking about affects people.
A good way of showing how an issue affects people is by giving an example of a real person.
Next - what is the issue?
This is when you show why your issue or problem is important. And not just to you.
You give evidence of the problem. You show why what you are asking for is important.

9. 5 parts to explaining your message
3. Give a solution
How your idea will fix the issue you have said.
4. Benefits
Who else will get something out of the change you suggest? 
5. What you are asking for?
What do you want to happen?
The next 3 parts are
What is the solution? How will your idea fix the issue you have talked about?
This is when you say what the world would look if the issue was fixed. You can say what your project has to offer. It is the big picture of what you think should happen. It is great if you can motivate people with your solution.
What are the benefits of the change that you suggest?
The benefits are the good things that can happen. These are the things that will change if the person listens to you and acts on your message. It is helpful if you can say who will benefit. Or what will be good if what you ask for happens.
Finally, what you are asking from the person you are talking to?
This is what you want from who you are speaking to. It needs to be clear and able to be done.
Does anyone want to share their idea of what they want to ask for and we can work through it together as a group?
Go through an example from the group or choose 1 of your own if none are suitable.
Now use handout 2 to start to make some notes about the issue you are thinking about.
Make sure people know what they are doing. Allow time.

10. Ways to prepare Talk to people you know and trust
Talk to be people who are experts
Look up information on the internet
Go to a library
Talk to the local council
There are lots of ways you can prepare to explain each part of the framework.
Here are some ways.
You can talk to people you know and trust about the issue and find out what they think.
You can talk to be people who are experts. These are people who have information that you could use.
You can look up information on the internet.
You can go to a library.
You can talk to the local council.
Can anyone think of any other ways?
Scribe up ideas
Have a discussion about ideas and the importance of planning
Other tips are - Keep notes of what you find out.
Think about information that agrees with you. Also look at information that does not support what you want to happen.
Knowing what people who do not agree with you say will help you to prepare.
It may help to guide you to ask more questions and find out more information.
You can use the framework to arrange your notes under headings

11. Persuasion – getting people to say yes to your dream
Being a leader in your own life or in your community, means getting other people say yes to your dreams and ideas.
The framework we have talked about will help you work out the basic reasons why someone should say yes to what you want.
But getting people to agree to what you want can be hard. And there may be other ideas that could help.

12. Persuasion means Convincing Encouraging Sweet talking
If you want people to help you achieve things it is good to have skills in persuasion.
Persuasion means getting someone to agree with your ideas.
Persuasion means:
convincing
encouraging
sweet talking.
It also means coaxing.
Can you think of any other words?
Can you think of a time when someone persuaded you to do something?
Give an example
Coaxing, convincing and sweet talking takes skill. Some people are better at it than others - but we can all get better.

13. How to use the video Watch all the video 1 time then…
Watch it again – 1 bit at a time.
It will help you remember all the ideas!
We have a video we can watch that talks about all of these ideas to be persuasive.
It is a really helpful video but it goes quite fast. So, we are going to watch the whole video.
You can go back to the video and watch it slowly later so don’t worry if it is too fast for you the first time.

14. Secrets from the science of persuasion
Here is the video. It is called Secrets from the science of persuasion. It talks about research we can learn from. It goes for about 11 minutes and 50 seconds
You can make some notes on handout 3. You will see that the handout includes notes about the 6 main ideas the video talks about.
Give handout 3
Does anyone have any comments about the video? Did anyone get any ideas?
Scribe ideas
Secrets from the science of persuasion

15. 6 ways to be persuasive
1. Reciprocity - meaning that people give back to each other
2. Scarcity - meaning there is not enough of something
3. Authority - meaning having expertise, specialist knowledge or skills
The video talks about 6 things you can do to get better at being persuasive.
The first 3 things that can help you be persuasive are
1. Reciprocity: meaning that people give back to each other
2. Scarcity: meaning a shortage or not enough
3. Authority: meaning having expertise, specialist knowledge or skills

16. 4. Consistency - meaning being stable or reliable 5. Liking someone
6. Consensus - meaning lots of people agree to something
The next 3 things that can help you be persuasive are
4. Consistency: meaning being stable, steady or reliable
5. Liking - someone
6. Consensus: meaning lots of people agree to something

17. Reciprocity – people give back to each other
We are more likely to say yes if we feel that we owe the person something.
We are more likely to feel that we should give something if we have received something.
Read slide and discuss
You can use the examples in handout 3 to illustrate – or choose your own examples

18. Scarcity – when there is not enough of something
We are more likely to want something if there is not much left.
We think it is worth more if there is not much left.
Read slide and discuss

19. Authority - when we think someone is an expert, has special knowledge or skills
We are more likely to believe people with titles and qualifications.
We are more likely to say ‘yes’ to someone who we think we can trust.
We trust people we have agreed with before.
Read slide and discuss

20. Consistency – stable and reliable
We are more likely to say ‘yes’ if something is similar to what happened before.
We are more likely to say ‘yes’ to a big thing, if we said ‘yes’ to something similar but smaller before.
Read slide and discuss

21. When we like someone
We are more likely to say ‘yes’ to someone if we like them.
We tend to like people more if they;
are like us
say nice things about us (compliment us)
work with us
Read slide and discuss

22. We are more likely to say ‘yes’ when other people say yes
Consensus – we like to agree on things
We are more likely to say ‘yes’ when other people say yes
Read slide and discuss

23. What can you add to the framework?
Now that you have thought about ways to persuade people is there anything that you can add to the framework we talked about earlier?
For example can you
Offer to do something to assist. This would be reciprocity.
Get an expert report. This would be using authority.
Find out if what I am asking for has happened somewhere else. This would be consistency.
Get people to sign a petition to say they support what I am asking for.
Find out about the person you are talking to. This would be consensus.
Can we compliment the person about previous work? This would make it more likely that they would like you.
Can you say that what you asking for is urgent for some reason? This would be about scarcity and could apply about something like an environmental issue.
I will give you time to write down your ideas.
Allow time
Does anyone want to share? (if time)

24. Asking for what you want
When you have done your research you should know what you are asking for and why.
You should also have thought about what could persuade someone to do what you want.
The next issue is working out how to ask.
How you go about asking can make a huge difference to whether you get what you want.
In this part of the training we will talk about good and bad ways of asking for what you want.

25. Who, when, where, how? Who should you ask? Who should ask?
When should you ask?
Where should you ask?
How should you ask?
Who, when, where, how?
Give handout 4 - Tell people they can take notes on handout 4
A man called Ric Thompson from Queensland has written an article with tips for the act of asking. He suggests some things to think about. He says to think about read slide
Let’s write up our ideas about each question
Who should you ask? [Decision maker, if possible, someone who is an ally]
Who should do the asking? [You, more than one person, take an expert?]
When should they ask? [When person has time to listen, not when doing something else, allowing enough time to do the thing]
Where should they ask? [Somewhere person can listen – maybe office – depends on what asking for]
How should you ask?
Sometimes it may be good to use written words to ask for something. Maybe a letter, an or a report.
Sometimes it could be enough to talk on the phone.
Sometimes it will be good to meet face to face.
It will depend on what you asking for.

26. How should I ask? Assertive Passive Aggressive
If you are going to meet to discuss want you want, the way you say your message will be very important.
It is important to say your message effectively.
There are 3 main ways you can say a message. You can be
assertive or
passive
aggressive.

27. Being assertive Confident Show respect
We will start by talking about saying what you want assertively.
If you are assertive you are confident and respectful.

28. Being assertive also means…
Saying things in a way that
does not hurt other people – that is aggressive
does not let you be hurt by other people – that is passive
So being assertive means saying what you want – but in a way that does not hurt another person. That would be aggressive.
Some people do not say what they want. They let things happen to them without speaking up. They could be hurt because they do not speak up. They are passive.
Other words for passive are quiet, long suffering, hands off and submissive.

29. What does being assertive look like?
Assertive people stand up for their rights
2. They are honest and respect the rights of other people
Read slide
What do you think being assertive looks like?
Give people a chance to say things. If people don’t say these things you could say…
It is not angry. It is not passive.
It is calm. It is honest. It is respectful. It is strong.
It is firm and pleasant.

30. Passive, Aggressive, Assertive
This is a video that gives an example of a person talking to her daughter.
The mum is first
passive
then she is aggressive or angry
then she is assertive.
It will help you understand what each type of communication can look like.
Give handout 5
You can take notes on handout 5.
Watch the video.
What do you think worked best?
Give people a chance to discuss
Passive, Aggressive, Assertive

31. Practice getting someone to say ‘yes’
Think about 1 thing you want someone to say ‘yes’ to.
Think about something that you want to say.
It could be something that has been annoying you for a long time.
Maybe it is making you sad?
Maybe it is making you angry?
It could be something small like
I want my housemate to do her share of the dish washing
or something big like
I want businesses to employ more people with disability.
What do you want to change? Write or draw what you are thinking about so that you remember.
Get people to write on handout 5

32. Practice saying things in different ways
Try being passive – like a mouse.
Pretend you are not important
Use a soft voice
We are now going to practice saying things in different ways. We will start with being passive.
It may help to think of yourself as a mouse. Being little and having a little voice.
Pretend you are someone who is not important and that you have no respect for yourself.
You could get someone to show the group. If nobody volunteers or if they don’t quite understand, you demonstrate.
Think about the thing you want someone to say yes to.
Turn to the person sitting next to you and practice saying it in a way that is not assertive. Say it in a way that is passive.
Let people try.
How did that feel? You can take notes on handout 5.
Discuss

33. Practice saying things in different ways
Try being aggressive – like a monster
Use a loud voice
We are now going to practice saying things in a way that is aggressive.
If it helps, you can think of yourself as a monster or a hammer that smashes others in your way.
Pretend that you have no respect for the person you are talking to.
You could get someone to demonstrate for the group. If nobody volunteers or if they don’t quite understand, you demonstrate.
Think about the thing you want someone to say yes to.
Turn to the person sitting next to you and practice saying it in a way that is aggressive.
Let people try.
How did that feel?
Discuss

34. Practice saying things in different ways
Try being assertive.
Be strong and kind at the same time
Finally, we will practice saying something in a way that is assertive.
It may help you to think of yourself as being strong and kind. Having respect for yourself and having respect for the other person at the same.
You could get someone to demonstrate for the group. If nobody volunteers or if they don’t quite understand, you demonstrate.
Think about the thing you want someone to say yes to. How could you say it in a way that is assertive?
This is a good way to communicate so turn to your partner and have a go.
Let people try.
Debrief in large group about whole session:
What is easy about this?
What is hard?
What did you notice?

35. More tips to get people to listen to your message and take action
Keep it simple.
Be surprising. You could have an interesting and unexpected way of thinking about something.
Make it real. Give details and examples.
Be believable.
Tell the story.
More tips to get people to listen to your message and take action
Here are a few more tips to get people to listen to your message and act on it.
Read dot points
Discuss slide – ask if people have any other suggestions
Could give other tips if not mentioned like
don’t speak too fast
project your voice
use eye contact
stay on topic

36. Questions?
Does anyone have any questions about all the things we have talked about so far?
Answer questions ort continue

37. Practice!
It is now time to bring it all together and practice asking for want you want using all the ideas we have talked about.
You can do this in pairs or pick one person to do it for the group

38. Being brave about speaking up
Did everyone feel good about asking for what they want?
Would you still feel ok talking to people you don’t know?
Allow people to discuss or move on
Some people have lots of things to say and know how to say them but they stay quiet.

39. Let go of what is stopping you
Getting your message across will mostly mean speaking up in front of
other people
How do you feel about that?
Let go of what is stopping you
Read slide – not heading
Have a discussion

40. People who are afraid of speaking up say things like
I am afraid of what could happen next
I do not feel confident
I am scared of what other people will think
Nobody listens to me anyway
I feel like I do not know how to say things
I am too shy
I do not want people to laugh at me
People who are afraid of speaking up say things like
Read slide
Do any of you feel like that?
Discuss
If you feel scared to talk in front of other people there are a few things you can do.
Here is one.

41. How I beat stage fright How I beat stage fright
A man called Joe felt scared about talking in public.
He had stage fright.
Stage fright is when you are scared to do something in front of other people.
We are going to watch a video about what Joe did to work on his problem.
The video goes for 8 minutes.
Could note that some parts may offend some people
Give handout 6– say what it is.
Watch video
Talk about the video – note key points
Make sure that people understood
How I beat stage fright

42. Being brave about speaking up
Tell someone how you feel before you start
Take big breaths
Practice in front of a mirror
Practice in front of people you trust
Meditate
Be scared but do it anyway
I am scared
Take a breath
We cannot all do what Joe did.
We cannot all sing. But here are some other ways you can deal with stage fright
Read points from slide
Write 2 things you will do to beat stage fright. There is a space on page 6 of handout 6.
You can practice doing all of these things. Let’s practice 2 things in the list.
1st – tell the person next to you how you feel about speaking in public. Allow time
Now - take big breaths Allow time
How did that make you feel?
Try taking a big, slow breaths the next time you want to say something and see how it makes you feel.
Optional – scribe up an inspirational quote and discuss. Use this one or choose your own
“If you don’t go after what you want, you’ll never have it. If you don’t ask, the answer is always no. If you don’t step forward, you’re always in the same place.”
Nora Roberts (American author)

43. Evaluation What did you learn at this workshop?
What 2 actions will you take?
What else do you want to learn about?
We have come to the end of the training session.
What did you learn at this workshop?
What 2 actions will you take?
What else do you want to learn about?
Give out evaluations or use PowerPoint and take notes.