1. Choosing the Best Life

2. lesson one
Choosing the Best Life 8
For the next 8 lessons we will be studying Choosing the Best Life ,
a course to help teens make the best choices about sexual behavior.
750,000 teens get pregnant each year
25% of sexually active Grads have a STD

3. “Sex, Emotions and self-respect”
lesson one
Choosing the Best Life
“Sex, Emotions and self-respect”
The first lesson deals with sex, emotions and self-respect
Turn to page 6
We will discuss the questions on page 6 after watching Video Segment One: “Males vs. Females”
<6>

5. Video Segment 1 “Guys vs. Girls”
lesson one
lesson one
Choosing the Best Life
DVD
Video Segment 1 “Guys vs. Girls”

6. Guys: sex is physical, driven by hormones & peer pressure
lesson one
“Males vs. Females”
How do guys and girls view sex differently?
Guys: sex is physical, driven by hormones & peer pressure
Girls: sex is an emotional experience, involving strong feelings
<6>

7. lesson one
lesson one
“Males vs. Females”
2. Guys: What would you like girls to know to better understand about guys?
<6>

8. lesson one
lesson one
Choosing the Best Life
“Males vs. Females”
3. Girls What would you like guys to know to better understand about girls?
<6>

9. > Guys & Girls Can View Sex Differently
lesson one
> Guys & Girls Can View Sex Differently
Guys
1. Does not = personal relationship
2. Expect sex to happen sooner
3. Love & Commitment
4. Not Serious
5. Turned on/Curious/impress friends
6. Partner pressure
7. Less pleasure and satisfaction
Guys
Girls
Guys
Guys
Girls
Girls
<7>

10. Guys & Girls are different
lesson one
Guys & Girls are different
3 Ways Sex is Misused to Meet Emotional Needs 1.
Acceptance 2.
Man 3.
Valued
Why?
Disappointment
<7>

11. Guys & Girls are different
View Sex
Guys can focus more easily on the physical side of sex w/out relationship
Girls tend to have a broader view of sex, emphasizing the total relationship
Sex Hormones
How does testosterone affect guys?
How are girls affected by estrogen?
Stimulation
Sight? Guys can just see something sexual and be aroused.
Words, personality, touch? Girls are stimulated by the whole event.
BRAIN ACTIVITY
1 a time
Both sides together
<7 supplemental >

12. Guys & Girls Can View Sex
lesson one
Guys & Girls Can View Sex
BRAIN ACTIVITY
What does each side of the brain do?
LEFT PORTION
RIGHT PORTION
the Logical Side
the creative side
Deals with concrete thinking and reasoning
Deals with feelings and emotions
<7 supplemental >

13. Six Emotional Effects of Premarital Sexual Involvement
lesson one
Six Emotional Effects of Premarital Sexual Involvement
Why? Effect?
1. Worry
2. Regret & Guilt 3.
Impairs Personal Development 4.
Fear of Future Relationships 5.
Lowers Self-esteem
6. Depression
<8>

14. Six Emotional Effects of Premarital Sexual Involvement
lesson one
Six Emotional Effects of Premarital Sexual Involvement
Why? Effect?
1. Worry
Fear:
pregnancy
getting an STD or AIDS
parents finding out
Nervousness
loss of sleep
poor grades
possible long-term health problems
<8>

15. Six Emotional Effects of Premarital Sexual Involvement
lesson one
Six Emotional Effects of Premarital Sexual Involvement
Why? Effect?
2. Regret & Guilt
Relating sex to love and feeling loss when relationship ends
Regret about not reaching personal goals
Guilt about going against personal values
Being disappointed in self’ regret about hurting others
Medical problems such as ulcers
Eating disorders
<8>

16. Six Emotional Effects of Premarital Sexual Involvement
lesson one
Six Emotional Effects of Premarital Sexual Involvement
Why? Effect? 3.
Impairs Personal Development
May turn inward
Fail to develop healthy interests and relationships
Fail to develop a personal, independent identity
Experience feelings of betrayal that can lead to rage
Can use sex to escape pressures or to avoid
Learning how to communicate in a healthy way with opposite sex
<8>

17. Six Emotional Effects of Premarital Sexual Involvement
lesson one
Six Emotional Effects of Premarital Sexual Involvement
Why? Effect? 4.
Fear of Future Relationships
Difficulty trusting Inability to make a commitment to someone
Withdrawal from close relationships
pattern of use and abuse in relationships
Fear of being used or betrayed again
Have not learned healthy communication
Jealousy
<8>

18. Six Emotional Effects of Premarital Sexual Involvement
lesson one
Six Emotional Effects of Premarital Sexual Involvement
Why? Effect? 5.
Lowers Self-esteem
May feel used or damaged, unhappy or lacking dignity
May have sex again to feel control
May seek attention or turn to destructive behavior
May feel dehumanized or worthless
Weak or powerless if partner is selfish or controlling
<8>

19. Six Emotional Effects of Premarital Sexual Involvement
lesson one
Six Emotional Effects of Premarital Sexual Involvement
Why? Effect?
6. Depression
May lead to attempted or successful suicide
Girls sexually active = 6x more likely to attempt suicide than virgins
Boys= 8x
Feels like a failure
Feels deeper pain because already sees events in an emotional way
<8>

20. Character Application
lesson one
Character Application
SEX & Self-Respect
Heart Activity
What parts of the story did you respond to by tearing large parts of your heart?
Are there any differences in the piles of torn pieces on the boys’ vs girls’ desks?
<9>

21. Character Application
SEX & Self-Respect
Character Application
Heart Activity
Is it possible for Kendra to restore her life?
If Kendra respected herself, would she have given herself to Antonio without his commitment to her?
What is this commitment called?
Waiting for sex is called?
Consequences of abstinence?
<9>

22. Character Application
SEX & Self-Respect
Character Application
Character is who you are on the inside. It’s how you act and think when no one else is around. One part of healthy character development is self-respect. Respect for yourself begins with the idea that you are valuable and worthy. We’ve seen how sexual relationships before marriage often lower self-respect in both people. The emotional pain can cause a downward spiral of feelings.
Personal Application:
<10>

23. Character Application
SEX & Self-Respect
Character Application
Discussion Questions: PAGE 10
Answer all questions on this page
Personal Application:
<10>

24. Sex, alcohol and respect
lesson two
Sex, alcohol and respect
View video and then we will discuss:
“sex and alcohol don’t mix”
Take notes on page 12
Choosing the Best Life
<11>

25. Video Segment 2 “Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
Choosing the Best Life
DVD
Video Segment 2 “Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”

26. “Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
lesson two
“Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
What effect does alcohol have on a young person?
Increased risk of sexual activity
Date rape
Contracting STDs
Pregnancy
<12>

27. “Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
lesson two
“Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
2. Why do you think some teens drink alcohol?
Peer pressure
Like the calming feeling
Feel less inhibited and less anxious
<12>

28. “Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
lesson two
“Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
3. What are some of the risks of “hooking up” under the influence of alcohol?
Become less inhibited
Become less assertive in maintaining boundaries
Can lose consciousness
Can be unaware of partner’s actions
<12>

29. “Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
lesson two
“Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
Did she get pregnant?
Did either of them contract an STD?
What were the consequences for them?
Activity: One Guy and One Girl
<12>

30. What do you know about “Date Rape?
lesson two
What do you know about “Date Rape?
Force
Shame
Guilt
Sadness
Guy – school suspension
Girl – felt loss of respect
Drugs
Date Rape
Rape
Alone 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9.
10.
True
True
True
False
False
True
True
False
True
True
<13>

31. Character Application
lesson two
SEX & Self-Respect
Character Application
Read the first paragraph on page 16 and then Sarah’s Story
DATE RAPE:
Rape occurs when one person forces another to have sexual relations
Incidence of rape in U.S. peaks among women age ,000 rapes per year, 61% under age 18.
84% of those who reported unwanted sexual intercourse knew their assailant.
Rape victims should seek immediate medical attention and contact a rape crisis center/hotline.
The victim is NEVER to blame for rape.
Rape is not about sex, but about control.
<13>

32. Character Application
lesson two
SEX & Self-Respect
Character Application
7. Date rape drugs can facilitate sexual assault by causing sedation and amnesia to the point that the victim cannot or may not resist or remember. Mixing drugs and alcohol is dangerous and potentially fatal.
8. Date rape drugs are easy to hide – colorless and odorless, but somewhat salty tasting. Can be hidden in a drink. Never leave your drink unattended!
9. Rape is a CRIME and punishable by IMPRISONMENT.
10. Never be alone with anyone who makes you feel uncomfortable or fails to show you respect.
<13>

33. > How Alcohol effects a young Person
lesson two
> How Alcohol effects a young Person
Brain
Memory
Death
Inhibitions
Unconsciousness
Sex
Five
Alcohol
50 to 75 percent
unplanned
<14>

34. The Physical Effects of Alcohol Abuse
lesson two
The Physical Effects of Alcohol Abuse
Activity: Bat
Brain:
learning
Mental:
coordination
Heart:
Attack
Digestive Tract:
cancer
Immune System:
infections
ulcers
Stomach:
Liver:
cancer
Reproductive System:
Impotence, irregular
<15>

35. Character Application
lesson two
SEX & Self-Respect
Character Application
Read and listen to the story on page16
Then answer the discussion questions.
Personal Application:
<16>

36. lesson three
Sex, STDs and honesty
STDs are unique because they are contracted through at risk sexual behaviors.
Watch the video and make notes.
Choosing the Best Life
<17>

37. Video Segment 3 “A Visit to a Microbiology Lab”
Choosing the Best Life
DVD
Video Segment 3 “A Visit to a Microbiology Lab”

38. “A Visit to a Microbiology Lab”
lesson three
“A Visit to a Microbiology Lab”
How can you tell if a person has an STD?
You can’t!
2. Why are most teens not concerned about contracting an STD?
They think they’re invincible.
3. Most common STDs?
Chlamydia
Gonorrhea
Syphilis
Human papillomavirus (HPV)
Genital herpes
<18>

39. “Chlamydia” Read introductory paragraphs Slide 1 and 2
lesson three
Read introductory paragraphs
Slide 1 and 2
The Silent Disease
Bacterial,1.5 million no
oral
Cured
PID; infertility
3 to 10
<19>

40. “Gonorrhea” Read introductory paragraph Slide 3 and 4
lesson three
Read introductory paragraph
Slide 3 and 4
One of the Oldest STDs
650,000 no
Oral
PID 50
HIV
<20>

41. “Syphilis” Read introductory paragraph Slide 5-8 bacterial direct oral
lesson three
“Syphilis”
Read introductory paragraph
Slide 5-8
bacterial
direct
oral
sore
cured
death
<21>

42. lesson three
“Trichomoniasis”
parasite no
cured
<21>

43. “Human Papilloma Virus (HPV)”
lesson three
Read introductory paragraph
Slide 9-10
The Most Common Viral STD
Viral; 50%;43%
Genital; cancer
No; life
HPV; die
Pap
oral
<22>

44. Read introductory paragraph Slide 11-13 More Than 45 Million Infected
“Genital Herpes”
lesson three
Read introductory paragraph
Slide 11-13
More Than 45 Million Infected
Viral; 45
90%
life
Blisters
Skin to skin
Visual; not
<23>

45. 4 million; 10,959 daily; 457 hourly; 8 seconds No; multiple; cervix
lesson three
STDs Are Wide Spread 25
15.3 million; 65 million
4 million; 10,959 daily; 457 hourly; 8 seconds
No; multiple; cervix
<24>

46. lesson three
Here’s How they Spread
ACTIVITY 3 6 1 8 2
<24>

47. What about ”safe Sex” Condom Every Correctly Not Half
How well do condoms work for birth control?
Break;
15%
Reduce STD risk ?
85%; 15%
Fluids; 50%
Skin to skin
HPV No
Abstinence
<25>

48. Is ‘Safe sex really safe?
lesson three
What about ”safe Sex”
Is ‘Safe sex really safe?
What is the only way to ELIMINATE the risk of pregnancy or of contracting an STD?
<25>

49. What does abstinence involve?
lesson three
What about ”safe Sex”
What does abstinence involve?
Making an informed decision to not participate in risk-taking behaviors that can lead to pregnancy or an STD
<25>

50. What are at-risk behaviors?
lesson three
What about ”safe Sex”
What are at-risk behaviors?
Vaginal sex
Anal sex
Oral sex
Mutual masturbation
which can pass infected body fluids through skin-to-skin contact
<25>

51. Character Application
lesson three
Character Application
Sex and Honesty
Read two paragraphs on page 26
And answer the 2 questions
Personal Application: Answer
<26>

52. Sex, pregnancy and responsibility
lesson four
Sex, pregnancy and responsibility
Video “Nicole and Raoul”
Turn to page 28. read these as we start the video.
Watch the video and make notes.
Choosing the Best Life
<28>

53. Video Segment 4 “Nicole and Raoul”
Choosing the Best Life
DVD
Video Segment 4 “Nicole and Raoul”

54. “Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
lesson four
“Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
How did getting pregnant affect Nicole’s life?
Scared during pregnancy
Thought he would help
Teenage years of freedom gone
<28>

55. 2. How did getting pregnant affect Raoul’s life?
lesson four
“Nicole and Raoul”
2. How did getting pregnant affect Raoul’s life?
Hard to get a job & make $
Relationship changed
Did not know the amount of attention a baby needed.
< 28 >

56. 3. What happen to their relationship after the baby?
lesson four
“Nicole and Raoul”
3. What happen to their relationship after the baby?
Less time together
Strain
Could not do things together the way they once did.
< 28 >

57. Teen pregnancy is a significant problem.
lesson four
Teen pregnancy is a significant problem.
highest
750,000; 10; 19 20
<29>

58. Who Suffers the Consequences?.
lesson four
Who Suffers the Consequences?.
1/3
health
poverty
low
<29>

59. Reducing the Risk of Teen Pregnancy
lesson four
Reducing the Risk of Teen Pregnancy
Read Chart page 30
Activity: 7 volunteers
Activity: Cards
<30>

60. Consequences of Choices
lesson four
Consequences of Choices
Teen Parenting
Adoption
Abortion
Medical
Complications
Physical
guilt
shame
later regret
sadness
Sadness,
Emotional
Regret
Parenting
Social
income
<31>
responsibility

61. Sex and Responsibility
lesson four
Sex and Responsibility
Read paragraph
Answer discussion questions
<32>

62. Sex, HIV/AIDS and compassion
lesson five
Sex, HIV/AIDS and compassion
Turn to page 34.
Read the question before we start video
Watch the video and make notes.
Choosing the Best Life
<33>

63. Video Segment 5 “A Life-Changing Visit to an AIDS Clinic ”
Choosing the Best Life
DVD
Video Segment 5 “A Life-Changing Visit to an AIDS Clinic ”

64. “A life-Changing Visit to an AIDS Clinic”
lesson five
“A life-Changing Visit to an AIDS Clinic”
What did you learn from Lisa? Just hold off?
infected while engaged, almost died many times, medicine not a cure, she will eventually die
<34>

65. “A life-Changing Visit to an AIDS Clinic”
lesson five
“A life-Changing Visit to an AIDS Clinic”
2. What did you learn from Dottie?
acquired the disease at 16 from a boy she hardly knew and several years later developed AIDS
Incubation ? As long as 10 years as short as months
Fastest grow under 24
<34>

66. “A life-Changing Visit to an AIDS Clinic”
lesson five
“A life-Changing Visit to an AIDS Clinic”
3. Do teen need to be concerned about contracting HIV/AIDS?
YES
<34>

67. What Happens If You contract HIV?
lesson five
What Happens If You contract HIV?
stage
Effect 1
Sexual
Initial Infection
<35>

68. What Happens If You contract HIV?
lesson five
What Happens If You contract HIV?
stage
Effect 2
not
Initial Symptoms
<35>

69. What Happens If You contract HIV?
lesson five
What Happens If You contract HIV?
stage
Effect 3
many
Asymptomatic Stage
<35>

70. What Happens If You contract HIV?
lesson five
What Happens If You contract HIV?
stage
Effect 4
immune
Early AIDS Symptoms
<36>

71. What Happens If You contract HIV?
lesson five
What Happens If You contract HIV?
stage
Effect 5
Opportunity
AIDS
<36>

72. What Happens If You contract HIV?
lesson five
What Happens If You contract HIV?
stage
Effect 6 NO
Treatment
<36>

73. lesson five
Activity: Cups
<36>

74. <37> Ten Common Myths About HIV/AIDS
lesson five
NO. Medication can prolong life but with severe side affects
Does not always know
Cannot tell by how a person looks
You can become infected from only one sexual encounter
Can from oral sex
Do not live health normal lives
not spread by casual contact
Affects BOTH…25% under 22
Cannot
Practice Abstinence
Ten Common Myths About HIV/AIDS
<37>

75. READ page 38 and answer questions
lesson five
Compassion
READ page 38 and answer questions
<38>

76. Sex, love and choices Turn to page 40.
lesson six
Sex, love and choices
Turn to page 40.
Read the question before we start video
Watch the video and make notes.
Choosing the Best Life
<39>

77. Video Segment 6 “Choosing Abstinence”
Choosing the Best Life
DVD
Video Segment 6 “Choosing Abstinence”

78. Choosing Abstinence to be in control of their own lives
lesson six
Choosing Abstinence
Why are these teens choosing abstinence?
to be in control of their own lives
to set priorities
to stay focused on future goals
because its not safe
<40>

79. Choosing Abstinence Wasn’t worth it, Emotional consequences,
lesson six
Choosing Abstinence
2. Why become ”secondary virgins”?
Wasn’t worth it,
Emotional consequences,
Physical consequences,
Focus education and personal goals
<40>

80. Choosing Abstinence Show respect
lesson six
Choosing Abstinence
3. How does abstinence help a relationship develop?
Show respect
Focus on inner qualities not just physical
Better see compatibility and character issues
<40>

81. Activity: Groups of 4-5 Decisions about Sex Page 41 Brainstorm
lesson six
Decisions about Sex
Activity: Groups of 4-5
Page 41 Brainstorm
Each team work together and fill in both list. (in all work books)
<41>

82. Choosing the Best Life A. not To: <42> B. FROM:
lesson six
Choosing the Best Life
A. not
vaginal sex, anal sex, oral sex , mutual masturbation and intimate skin-to-skin contact
B. FROM:
Abstinence Provides Freedom
fear of pregnancy, HIV, STDs, worry,
guilt, depression
To:
Pursue life goals, be free from worry or guilt, establish, a marriage built on trust, enjoy life as a teen
<42>

83. Choosing the Best Life C. Renewed Virginity <42> Renewed People
lesson six
Choosing the Best Life
C. Renewed Virginity
Renewed
People
share
accountable
<42>

84. Infatuation or Love relationship
lesson six
Infatuation or Love relationship
Infatuation
Love
1. I
Focus
1. other
2. very
2. levels
Feelings
3. short
3. long
Time together
4. problems
4. through
Tested
5. my
5. other
Commitment
<43>

85. Abstinence Helps Relationships Develop
lesson six
Abstinence Helps Relationships Develop
READ STORY of TOM and KRISTINE
1. Intense with strong emotions NO.
2. Physical focus and keep them from getting to know one another
3. Help them BUILD the relationship over time
<43>

86. Infatuation or Love relationship
lesson six
Infatuation or Love relationship
Infatuation
Love
1. Emotional
1. Commitment
2. Untested
2. Tested
3. feelings
3. Level out
4. Hormone
4. Knowledge
5. Weakens
5. Strengthens
6. Self
6. Caring
7. Jealous
7. Open
<42>

87. Sex, limits and self-discipline
lesson seven
Sex, limits and self-discipline
Turn to page 46.
Read the question before we start video
Watch the video and make notes.
Choosing the Best Life
<45>

88. Video Segment 7 “Dealing with Pressure”
Choosing the Best Life
DVD
Video Segment 7 “Dealing with Pressure”

89. “Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
lesson four
“Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
How did getting pregnant affect Nicole’s life?
Scared during pregnancy
Thought he would help
Teenage years of freedom gone
<28>

90. Sex, saying “no” and courage
lesson eight
Sex, saying “no” and courage
Video “ Taking a Stand”
Turn to page 52. read these as we start the video.
Watch the video and make notes.
Choosing the Best Life
<51>

91. Video Segment 8 “Taking a Stand”
Choosing the Best Life
DVD
Video Segment 8 “Taking a Stand”

92. “Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
lesson four
“Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
How did getting pregnant affect Nicole’s life?
Scared during pregnancy
Thought he would help
Teenage years of freedom gone
<28>

93. “Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
lesson two
“Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
Tape activity Unused a lot of Bonding Power.
1. Is this first relationship likely to last?
2. What happened to the bonding tape each time it was used?
3. What happens to two pieces of tape (two people in a relationship) that have never been used when they bond for the first time?
Ten Stages of Bonding
<12 supplemental >

94. “Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
lesson two
“Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
Tape activity Unused a lot of Bonding Power.
1. Is this first relationship likely to last?
2. What happened to the bonding tape each time it was used?
3. What happens to two pieces of tape (two people in a relationship) that have never been used when they bond for the first time?
Ten Stages of Bonding
<12 supplemental >

95. Stages of Emotional Bonding
1. Eye to Body contact
2. Voice to voice
3. Eye to eye
4. Hand to hand
5. Kiss- affection
6. Kiss- Passion
7. Hand to Head
8. Hand to breast contact
9. Hand to genital contact
10. Intercourse
lesson two
<12 supplemental >