1. Cherokee County District Attorney’s Office
TEEN DATING VIOLENCE
Presented by:
Cherokee County District Attorney’s Office

2. What do you think about when you hear the phrase “teen dating abuse?”
How many have known someone who was a victim of TDV? 50-80% of teens report knowing someone involved in a violent relationship 2

3. Dating Violence Questions
Which of the following could be considered a sign of relationship abuse?
My boyfriend didn't call me last night.
My boyfriend called me a slut in front of his friends because I was wearing makeup.
My boyfriend forgot our anniversary
2. What kind of behavior could be considered relationship abuse?
Keeping someone away from their friends or family
Calling someone names
Controlling what someone wears
All of the above 3

4. Talk to her, ask if everything's okay, in a calm non-judgmental way
3. I think a friend of mine might be in a violent relationship. What should I do?
Take her shopping
Talk to her, ask if everything's okay, in a calm non-judgmental way
Have your boyfriend beat up her boyfriend
Mind my own business
4. I think a friend of mine is hitting his girlfriend. What is the first thing I should do?
Sit down with him one-on-one, in a quiet place, and start talking to him about it.
Go immediately to a school counselor
Don't say anything 4

5. Talk to a teacher, counselor or another trusted adult All of the above
5. If everyone said you and your boyfriend were a cute couple but he was starting to get violent, what could you do?
Talk to a friend
Talk to a parent
Talk to a teacher, counselor or another trusted adult
All of the above
6. What can you do if you end a violent relationship, but your ex-boyfriend keeps trying to see you?
Explain your situation to an adult you can trust
Avoid situations where you might see your ex
Call the police if you are threatened or if you feel afraid 5

6. Myth or Fact??
Teen dating violence only happens to kids from bad homes.
Jealousy and possessiveness are a sign that the persons sees you as a possession. It is one of the most common early warning sign of abuse.
Males, as well as females, can be victims of teen dating violence and it can occur in any type of relationship.
My partner constantly checks up on me because he/she is worried about me.
Strangulation is a high risk indicator of domestic violence homicide.

7. What is Teen Dating Abuse?
Emotional
Verbal
Physical
Sexual
Controlling
Roles in TDV: Victim, abuser, bystanders (friends/family/community at large)
Teen Dating Abuse is a pattern of physically, sexually, verbally, and/or emotionally abusive or controlling behavior in a dating relationship 7

8. Dating Violence Facts
1 in 3 teenage females are victims of physical, verbal, emotional or sexual abuse
44% of the sexual assaults happen to victims under the age of 18 and 73% of sexual assault victims know their attacker (46% in Cherokee County are ages10-19)

9. Teen Cycle of Violence Who were you out with so late?
Let me see your phone.
You shouldn’t have done that
You are embarrassing me
I’m sorry!
Talk about escalation. Isolation, verbal, physical (shoving, slapping, punching/kicking, strangulation)
I’ll change.
You never do anything right!
Peer Acceptance
“Wrestling”

10. Technology and Abuse
Nearly 25% of teens ages 14 to 24 reported that partners check in multiple times a day to see where they are or who they are with and more than 10% said partners demanded passwords (Emotional Abuse)
1 in 4 teens have been harassed, put down, or called names via cell or text (Verbal Abuse)
1 in 5 teens have been harassed via social networking site (Verbal and Emotional Abuse)
Some abusers will make their partners afraid to not respond to a cell phone call, , IM, or text message because of what he or she might do

11. Technology and Abuse
1 in 3 teens say they are text messaged up to thirty times an hour by a partner or ex-partner inquiring where they are, what they are doing, or who they are with
1 in 4 teens in a relationship communicated with their partner by cell phone or text messaging hourly between midnight and 5:00 a.m (sleep deprivation is a form of physical abuse)
17% of teens in a recent survey report that a boyfriend or girlfriend has made them afraid to not respond to a cell phone call, , IM, or text message because of what he or she might do
How many of you believe computers and cell phones make abuse more likely to occur in a teen dating relationship and make it easier to conceal abuse from parents?

12. Cyber Abuse Abuse through phones, internet, or any type of technology
Password sharing
Spying, hacking, and monitoring with or without partner’s knowledge
Blocking or deleting certain friends on social networks
Constant harassing texts/phone calls/messages
Coerced Sexting
Certain actions are prosecutable, others are not. “I hate you”- not, “you’re a skank” –civil, “I’m going to come to your house and kill you”- criminal

13. What is sexting? So what’s the big deal? Sexting and the Laws
Sexting is a serious crime.
1. Anyone who creates, distributes, or possesses “child pornography,” even if it is an image someone voluntarily gave them can be charged and convicted under child pornography laws and be registered as a sex offender. Regardless of whether or not the person asked for the image, if he or she has it, the law presumes the person is in possession of child pornography.
2. Anyone along the chain of sharing, production, or possession can be labeled a sex offender.
3. Several cases have been successfully prosecuted against teens for taking sexting images, sharing them, and possessing them.
Sexting carries a sentence of
5-25 years in prison
(Ga Code ) 13

14. George Wesley Huguely V
Yeardly Love
UVA Star Student/Athlete

15. Yeardly Love Friends knew about:
* A player on an opposing team enters a bedroom to find Love in a choke hold at Huguely’s hands. He releases her and leaves.
* Threatening and text messages that Huguely sent to Love post-breakup
* Witness testimony of strangulation a week prior
* Days before her death, he sent her an that said "I should have killed you"
Days before her death, he sent her an that said "I should have killed you"
At trial, a witness testified to strangulation a week prior. The autopsy showed signs of strangulation and injuries to the carotid artery (supplies blood to the heart). Cause of death was blunt force trauma to the head.

16. George Wesley Huguely V Sentenced to 23 years in prison.
GUILTY
Expected release date He will be 45 years old.
UVA Star Student/Athlete
Prison Is Now Home

17. Strangulation
It takes only 4 lbs. of pressure to cut off both jugular veins
10 seconds brain damage
10-20 seconds loss of unconsciousness
2 minutes full unconsciousness
4 minutes DEATH
Victims of prior attempted strangulation are 7 times more likely of becoming a homicide victim at the hands of the same abuser.
Strangulation is placing your hands or other object around someone’s neck and cutting off their oxygen supply.
Choking is what you do on food.
Using 11 lbs of pressure, both jugular veins AND both carotid arteries are cut off, which speeds up the timeframe for damage
Share experiences regarding working with victims and their reactions to strangulation. “he puts his hands around my neck” Minimizing the incident.
DJ Elrod was previously strangled by Trevor Nuckles, he shot her in 2012.
*High lethality indicator*

18. Obstacles teens face in seeking help
Ending the relationship can be difficult and dangerous
Abusers rationalizing their abuse to their victims
“It’s not really abuse”
“I didn’t mean to hurt him or her”
“It’ll never happen again”
“She (or he) got me so angry, it just happened”
“She (or he) likes it”
“I can’t control myself”
-Not uncommon for a young person to try to end the relationship more than once. Sexual active increases the difficulty of breaking off a relationship.

19. Support
Do get medical attention for a friend if the relationship becomes physically abusive. Do offer your unconditional friendship and support.
Do be clear that you are there to listen, and not to judge. Do tell your friend it's not his/her fault. Do accept what he/she tells you. Do identify the unhealthy behaviors.
Do acknowledge the scariness of dating violence. Do encourage the victim to build a support system.

20. Increasing Safety Talk with a trustworthy adult Create a safety plan
Call the police
Get a restraining or protection order
Stay at a place that the abuser doesn’t know about

21. Escaping The Relationship
Reality check
Make the decision
Make a plan
Follow through
Realize you are in a violent relationship. If you believe you are in an unhealthy relationship you probably are.
Begin looking to leave. You should make this choice and be prepared to follow through.
Leaving the relationship. You should create a safety plan. Involve friends and family so that you have a support group and are surrounded by people who love you. Seek the advice of a counselor who can guide you in legal advice.
Actually leaving the relationship. This can be very hard but continue to remind yourself that you are loved and that you can do this. Ask for help-you are not alone. 21

22. Creating A Safety Plan
Every safety plan should be formatted to fit your
life because every situation is different.
PERSONALIZED
PREPARED
SUPPORTED BY YOUR COMMUNITY
REALISTIC
INCLUSIVE
Every safety plan should be formatted to fit your life because every situation is different.
Plans should be made before there is immediate danger if possible because it will be easier for you to think through the process.
Work through the plan with a friend or family member. Identify community resources that you can access when needed.
Make the plan address the reality of your situation. A safety plan will not work if it is difficult to follow.
Your plan should include safety issues for your home, your school, your job, online, and in social issues. 22

23. Temporary Protective Orders
A legal document that orders the abuser to stay away from,
and have no contact with the victim.
Enforceable by law enforcement
The court may order the abuser to:
Stay away from victim’s home and work;
Stay away from the victim while at school or at school activities 23

24. Temporary Protective Order Requirements for Minors
An adult over the age of 18 must petition for the order on the minor’s behalf. Georgia law does not specify whether the parent or guardian of the minor will be notified about the TPO.
A judge may issue a TPO if the abuser has physically abused, sexually abused, or stalked the victim; or damaged the victim's property. 24

25. What does a healthy relationship look like?

26. Dating Bill of Rights To always be treated with respect.
In a respectful relationship, you should be treated as an equal.
To be in a healthy relationship.
A healthy relationship is not controlling, manipulative, or jealous.
A healthy relationship involves honesty, trust, and communication.
To not be hurt physically or emotionally.
You should feel safe in your relationship at all times. Abuse is never deserved and is never your fault. Conflicts should be resolved in a peaceful and rational way.
To refuse sex or affection at anytime. 26

27. Dating Bill of Rights (cont)
A healthy relationship involves making consensual sexual decisions. You have the right to not have sex. Even if you have had sex before, you have the right to refuse sex for any reason.
To have friends and activities apart from my boyfriend or girlfriend.
Spending time by yourself, with male or female friends, or with family is normal and healthy.
To end a relationship.
You should not be harassed, threatened, or made to feel guilty for ending an unhealthy or healthy relationship. You have the right to end a relationship for any reason you choose. 27

28. Resources Cherokee Family Violence Center
24 hour English hotline number
24 hour Spanish hotline number
YWCA Rape Crisis Center
District Attorney’s Office Victim/Witness Assistance Program

29. QUESTIONS?